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for those who have lost thier fathers...

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 
I thought this was very touching and I wanted to share it with you all.

Dear Ann Landers: When my father died seven years ago, I decided to start a new tradition on Father's Day. Instead of crying over Dad every time this holiday comes around, I honor his memory by participating in one of his favorite activities.

For the first few years after Dad died that meant a trip to the track to watch the stock car races. Last year, I did something I knew Dad had always wanted to do -- I went to Poland to visit his cousins.

By doing these things, I have discovered that even though Dad is no longer with us, he is very much alive in our hearts. Simple things make me think of him -- like hearing a song he used to hum, or feeling the urge to wear black pants with a navy blue jacket. (We used to kid him about that.)

I hope other readers will use my suggestion as a way to honor their fathers, even if they are no longer alive. Instead of spending Father's Day moping around, I now get a lot of pleasure out of enjoying Dad's favorite activities, and in doing so, I have found a special peace. -- Daddy's Girl

I do not mean to imply in any way shape or form that any one is 'moping' around on fathers day, or to take away from someones grief, I just appreciated this persons take on what can be an incredibly painful day. I hope noone takes this the wrong way. I simply thought it was a nice sentiment, and having lost my mother, I can appreciate how hard the holidays are.
post #2 of 6
Hey AP,

That was a great letter and wonderful suggestion. Unfortunately my father chose to stay at home and drink, which is something I don't care to do. It's funny though, that when Mother's Day came around, I was a basket case (she's been gone for over 28 years now, and was glad when that holiday was over with. I guess I didn't care about Father's Day because I was kept busy at the Cape this past weekend. I don't mope about it even though I miss my dad terribly. I do go to the cemetery and spend a couple of hours there, either reading a book, talking to my parents (posthumously) or just getting some fresh air and sun. It helps clear my head and makes me feel better.
post #3 of 6
The holidays can be so hard on people who have lost loved ones - we don't celebrate the traditional holidays at my house so last Sunday came and went - but I will often think of my father - (he died in 89 and mom in 86) and find a tear or a smile coming.
Let's see...if I was doing something dad would have liked - I would be eating cashews, watching Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom or tv wrestling - We think he thought it was real! LOL
post #4 of 6
Thank you for the wonderful idea regarding how one might spend Fathers Day! My father died when I was still a kid, so I'll have to check with my (older) brother and find out what our father enjoyed doing when at leisure.

I do recall him watching baseball and boxing on television, back in the "early days" of that medium. See what you've gone and done? You've made me stop and think about some things I need to know. Thank you!

post #5 of 6
Thank you for this post, AP. I would like to take my nieces and nephews fishing the way my Dad used to take me, but we are all pretty well spread out now; maybe I can encourage them to start traditions now with their kids and not wait until the greatnieces and nephews loose a father.
post #6 of 6
This was my very first fathers day without my father. the sad thing is that not one single person who knows me, asked if I would be okay on this day. Not even my hubby.
If I did on fathers day, what my father enjoyed doing....I would first go to church....praise the Lord, then go out to eat, and eat WAY too much food...and top it all off, at home, with neopolitan ice cream.

God rest his soul.

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