Meet Horatio

I'm with you on leaving the kitty door unlocked at all times, Laurie. Horatio knows he can go back down there when he's had enough and honestly I don't know if the girls can even fit through the kitty door:-) They are big boned! But my husband is worried that they will gang up on him when we're asleep or away at work. Did you leave your cats together unsupervised during the socialization process? I'm in agony today. I just don't know what to do. Horatio still hasn't come back upstairs. Not even peeked through the kitty door. He'll probably start exploring right as we are ready to go to bed again... I'm going to give leaving the kitty door unlocked overnight a try. Hope that we haven't lost all of his trust last night...

It is so nice to read how concerned you are for the welfare of Horatio. He is one lucky kitty. I think you are doing a great job and he seems to progressing very well. It took one of my ferals a very long time, a year to be truthful, to even venture out of her room. He is doing so well and I am sure the three of them will one day become friends.

It took Horatio all day to decide to venture upstairs again. He came up at 8:15, spent a few minutes, went back down. Then, Bianca, our alpha cat stuck her head in the kitty door and he must have done something, so she walked away. At 10:45 p.m., he came up when Bianca was sitting under the dining room table and Katie was lounging in the living room. He did OK around Bianca. They sat roughly 4 feet from each other for several minutes, but then he saw Katie (whom he didn't get to meet last night because she was passed out cold on the loveseat) and went to introduce himself. Our sweet little Katie could not have been meaner. Hissing, growling. He would back up, go back to sit by Bianca, come back a few minutes later, same response. This went on for several tries. After a while Bianca got concerned and mover closer to Katie, Horatio went up to Bianca to be like "We're still friends, right?" They touched noses, smelled around but as Horatio was trying to do a full body rub on Bianca, she turned around and swatted him twice. He retreated several feet, sat around for a while. Then, he explored the rest of the house for a few minutes and went in the basement. We gave the girls some treats, they were not amused. I followed him into the basement and pet him for several minutes. Now the girls are in the living room again, he came back out. He is so sweet and friendly and my babies of 10 years are being total bullies... We are going to experiment with the kitty door being unlocked this evening, wish us luck. I don't want to lock him in, but I am a bit worried about safety.

No, these are not turf "wars." I know as cat mommy and daddy, it is just awful to watch, because you want them to all get along.

But here's our two notable stories of bringing in new ferals.

Every one of our cats is a feral rescue.

Our very first was Lazlo. Only about 10 weeks old. He socialized with us pretty quickly. Skittish still when we brought his brother inside 10 days later. We didn't know what we were doing, and thought they'd be happy to see each other. NOT. Gary handed Shelly in through the door, and I was holding him. He looked up at me - looked around - realized he was not outside - and LAUNCHED himself off my arms and BOLTED. Ran to the front of the RV - nowhere to go. Turn around, ran to the back of the RV - nowhere to go. He kept flying up and down the furniture, all around everywhere - and Lazlo saw a moving target and went for it. They were a rolling ball of fur. Shelly would get away, Lazlo would go after him. There was no screaming - but hissing, little bits of fur flying. We didn't see any blood or anything.... and Shelly found a place to hide, and Lazlo was pooped, so planted himself in the hallway so Sheldon couldn't leave without passing Lazlo.

Meanwhile, Gary's mom was visiting, and we had to get her to the airport. Meant we'd be gone for three hours. Should I go? Should I stay? Well - we decided they wouldn't actually kill each other, so I went. When we got home, we couldn't find them anywhere. I mean - we looked EVERYWHERE. Did they figure out some way to get out of the RV?????????????? The very last place we looked was the crate used to get them to the vet. There they were, asleep, all tangled up in each other. Now - we figured they were fighting, Lazlo chased Shelly in there - and they were just so tired they passed out together. But that was it. They're not best of friends, but we often found them sleeping together or near each other. Of course, if there was a new cat bed, one would get in, and the other would try to push the other one out - he'd refuse to go, so they'd end up smooshed together in there.

Next story, a bit more appropriate. It is now 7 years later. We have four 7 year old rescues, one that's six years old, and one that's five years old (all feral rescues). A different long story, we had to rescue an almost two-year old boy. We knew he was submissive, but we also knew he was VERY cat friendly, and ours are put up with each other and we have one ambassador kitty, but....

We release Billy into the bedroom and shut the door (we can block off the back from the front of the RV. We left it this way for a couple of hours, but ours are now running at the door to find out who's back here. They've all been told for weeks a new kitty was coming home and just like they were he's homeless, so they'd better just deal with it.

We open the door. Thankfully they didn't all rush in - they came in at various times, and Bill was nervous, but would walk up and try to headbump them. They'd look at him like he was a total alien - and either run away, or bop him on the head, or grab him around the neck, push him down and grab his neck with their mouths. He'd lie down, and that'd be it.

After that, he ventured out into the living room with a fair amount of confidence. He jumped up on the window seat where Tuxedo was. He tried to headbump Tuxie, who looked at him like he was some kind of freak. Billy got down submissively, and backed up - but stayed. He lay down and watched out the window for a while. Lazlo decided he didn't like Billy, and rushed at him. Billy bolted back into the bedroom.

He kept venturing out of the bedroom OK for the first few days... but when Lazlo kept rushing at him, he decided to basically live in the bedroom for the next few months. He'd come out for meals - and we always fed lazlo and Billy next to each other, and that always went just fine.

But at that point, we just focused on getting Lazlo to stop hating Billy. We put Bill scented rags under all the free feeding dishes, we'd play with Lazlo extra and put treats down on a Bill scented rag when we were done. We kept feeding them next to each other, and we'd put Lazlo's food down first. We'd praise Lazlo to high heaven any time Bill came into the room and Lazlo didn't meowl his strange "I don't want him here" meowl (the equivalent of most other kitty's hisses). After a month, when Lazlo continued rushing at Bill, we'd pick up Lazlo, put him in the bathroom, and tell him "you don't have to like Bill, you just have to ignore him" and leave him in there for a five minute time-out. We'd open the door without looking at him and just walk away. He TOTALLY got that we didn't want him rushing at Billy. Billy never gave up. He'd get down on his belly, slowly kind of crawl up to Lazlo in that submissive position, and slowly reach his nose out - and let Lazlo sniff him. Sometimes this worked, other times Lazlo would rush at him or meowl.

We never rewarded Lazlo when he meowled (hiss equivalent) or rushed Bill, but whenever Bill was around and Lazlo basically ignored him, we played with Lazlo, gave him treats, told him what a good boy he was, &etc. It took about 6 months total - and even today (a year and two months later) every once in a while Lazlo will run at Bill - but that's usually if Bill tried to headbump him. And Bill should know by now to just leave Lazlo alone. But our ambassador kitty will often groom Billy these days. Even our Tuxedo - formerly the meanest cat alive - will let Bill headbump him and groom him for a couple of licks on the head - and then bite his near (not hard, just a "I'm done with this"). Flowerbelle (our kitty with the most energy) and Billy play almost every day - a LOT of running around, jumping each other - and we figured out they weren't fighting, because when Billy would jump on her, she'd run away - often fleeing up a cat tree - then poke her head out, look around for him - see him, and run back at him and jump on him. There were no ears back, no ridged backs... there was some crying and hissing, but without the aggressive postures, it's normal kitty play.

So... Horatio may keep coming out to explore, and keep retreating when he gets rebuffed - it may take him a little while to figure out it's better not to try to body rub them. Or he may be like our Bill, and just not give up - but retreat to the basement for longer amounts of time for a few weeks.

Do you have cat trees and a lot of vertical spaces? Window seats for them at several windows? Because the more "up" spaces you have, and the more places you have for them to gaze outside or whatever, the less forced they'll be to have to share the same space upstairs, which may encourage them to develop their own territories upstairs that overlap, but enabling Horatio to have safe upstairs space.

But basically this all sounds very normal to me. They're talking to him in cat language, they're not trying to hurt him. They're working out their language, and Horatio's gonna need a little time to learn it. They don't want to share the territory - but so far they seem not too upset about it - only if he crosses whatever "personal space" line they've got - and then they're not full on tackling him with the intent out for blood - they're using polite cat language to say "get out of my face." Bops on the head, hisses, growls - these are all rather polite ways of saying "leave me alone."

Now... if her ears were back, she was low to the ground, her back was ridged, and her tail was flat/down and waving VERY agitatedly - that is "I'm gonna tackle you and show you no mercy." If it's just hissing/growling, and an agitated tail - that's "I'm warning you." If he ignores that, and walks over - he's gonna get bopped. And he should learn that pretty quickly. If he chooses to ignore it? He should know what's coming.

But really, it doesn't sound like either of them are out for blood. They're just trying to let him know what their boudaries are. Katie could have been a LOT meaner. She was just saying "keep your distance, pal." And by sniffing noses with Bianca, she was saying "Yeah, I don't hate you." But when he tried the full body rub, she said - I might not hate you, but you don't know me well enough to do THAT yet!

...at least that's the way I interpret it.

I'd be very interested to have others' take on it.

Thank you so much Laurie, those stories help immensely That is basically what my hubby was saying about Katie as well. She is the baby of our twins (emotionally) so she was probably just scared and wanted to make sure that Horatio wasn't going to walk straight into her life and start bullying her, like her sister Bianca has done off and on for the past decade... I think that's why Bianca is more tolerant, because she has put a lot of effort into establishing herself as the dominant cat and by now she figures no one can possibly challenge it.
Last night went surprisingly well. A little after midnight, I took Katie to the bedroom (she likes to sleep next to me overnight) and left Bianca in the living room. As soon as all the lights were out, we heard Horatio come up. He always seems to announce he's coming through the cat door, almost asking for permission. When we are up, I talk to him and tell him it's OK for him to come through, but last night we didn't talk to him, because we wanted him to understand sleep time. So walked around the house talking for a bit. Even came into the bedroom and said hello. I kept petting Katie and though her eyes were open trying to see what's going on, she never moved from my arm's reach. Horatio eventually went down and we all managed to sleep through the night.
I work today (hubby's off) and then I am off again tomorrow. So by the end of Wednesday it will have been about four days with supervision that all three have had access to each other. Thursday, both hubby and I work all day into the evening. I guess your airport story indicates I shouldn't worry about leaving them alone all day, Laurie?
We do have some high places, lots of windows with cushions in front of them to sit and look out. The dining room table is a de facto cat throne. The girls love to be on here... Lots of bookshelves, luckily not too many breakables:-) So, I'm not going to worry about a cat tree yet, but sometime in the near future it may be a fun project to make one.
Any other suggestions? Tips? Please keep them coming! They help so much.

I'm totally with Laurie on this one (and I remember that airport story! ) I've seen cats that have gotten truly violent with each other and what you are describing is not that at all. Horatio sounds like a sweetie pie, and your girls have known only each other for 10 years. To think that Horatio would walk about and everything be completely normal this soon is expecting way too much. It sounds like they are moving forward together at a very good pace.

If by Thursday you have any doubts about leaving them alone together, put an obvious barrier against the cat flap on the inside of the basement. Something very visual so that he doesn't think it's the flap that doesn't work, that it's the barrier that is in his way. When the visual barrier is removed, the flap magically works again.

What you do have going for you is that Horatio was hanging around your house for a year before you brought him inside. Your girls have seen him, and most likely caught his scent on you when you came inside. That is actually helping you right now, or things might not be as smooth.

When I coaxed my Lucky Pierre into the door for the first time at around 18 months old, my indoor cats were so used to seeing him (and smelling him thru the window screens - he would sit on the outside window ledge with cats sitting on the indoor ledge so they actually touched), that he walked inside, a couple of cats walked up, gave him a good sniff and simply walked away. Stumpy (my alpha), did give him the obligatory hiss just to let him know who owned the house. Had Lucky challenged him Stumpy would have put him in his place. Which is the other thing you have going for you - Horatio sounds to be very mellow and used to other cats. As long as he remains passive, you shouldn't see any real problems.

I look forward to your updates!

I love hearing about Horatio

I think he is doing wonderful.

They'll be interacting soon enough.

You may want to search threads about Marlow and Sasha on here - 1 former feral who became an inside kitty, and then later down the road, another former feral who eventually moved into the household (diggerled - hope I got those details right!!!). It was neat to watch their progress. You'll be posting pictures of your 3 kitties interacting soon enough!!!

IMO, if Katie had a serious problem with Horation, she'd have bolted off the bed and gone for him. Same with the first time she saw him. She could have tackled him. But if Bianca is the established alpha, and she's basically OK and sniffing him without too much trouble, the I really wouldn't worry too much about leaving them alone. Obviously watch them over the next few days and see what happens.

But honestly, it sounds like things really couldn't be going much better, and I'm pretty sure they'll be OK. If you're at all worried, follow Amy's suggestion.

This Horatio thread is SO MUCH help and comfort, as I am experiencing almost the exact same thing! 19 days ago, I took in a male 2-3 yr.old neutered stray (Jake) that I became friends with outside for about 3-months.. My resident indoor only cats have lived here for 10 yrs, David (11-ish) and Lilly (12-ish). David and newcomer Jake, hit it off FABULOUSLY, they can be loose together in the house always, but Lilly is horrible, horrible, with Jake (the SAME crap she pulled with David 10 years ago!).. I still only let Lilly and Jake loose together for only a few (1 or 2) hours a day. When I am at work the newbie is in his own bedroom, but when I come home I try to let him loose with resident cats, but when Lilly starts her posturing, hissing growling crap, I get scared (can't take it anymore, I'm so terrified she will attack him) and put Lilly in Jake's room for an hour or 2 so she gets used to his scent. But just like with Horatio, one step forward, 2 steps back..

Good luck with your Horatio KansasCats, I FEEL YOUR PAIN..lol..keep posting how it is progressing (or as in the case with Lilly, regressing, lol ugh)

These stories from all of you experienced with this is so much help, thanks again and would love to hear more

Horatio is gorgeous!

Just add me to the list of people who'll tell you that your intro seems to be going very well. I have three cats. When I introduced the third to the first two, it took almost a month for everyone to settle down. There was a great deal of chasing, growling, swatting, and hissing, and I was sure I'd made a horrible mistake by bringing the newcomer into our happy home. Well, that was a little over a year ago. They all get along famously now; just today I saw all three lying on the bed together.

Thanks again for the outpouring support today. I feel blessed to have found such a supportive, helpful and loving community! Things are progressing slowly, but well, and when I stop being impatient, I realize how good we have it. It's just that I've thought for the last 10 years that I had two of the sweetest animal companions one could ever share their life with and when we came across another sweet, loving soul I thought things would be seamless. Not so, I understand. I also understand it doesn't take away from them being sweet. Everyone's looking out for their own safety first, which is good. Tonight, things are more of the same. Apparently Horatio did not come upstairs at all when I was gone, which is OK, my hubby is used to me being the cat-mother-queen of the house:-) Horatio did come out several times this evening. Both Bianca and Katie were in the living room, so Horatio lounged around under the dining room table, looking like he was born to be an "indoor cat." My husband said he is actually amazed that Horatio made it on his own for two years. The more he is indoors, the more it is hard to imagine he ever survived out there. He loves pets, he speaks in a soft, baby kitty voice and he just wants to be friends with everybody:-) Which, of course, at the moment concerns mainly Katie. Boy, does he want to be her best buddy ever!!! Unfortunately we had more of the same with Katie this evening. A mad wagging of the tail, hissing and growling. She doesn't go after him, the ears don't go flat or anything, it's just that she's terrified of him and trying to defend herself. Bianca watched the whole thing from a chair tonight and didn't even flinch. She is not afraid!
But yes, I have been reading the story of Marlow and Sasha, which has been helpful and I have appreciated all of the stories today, too. I'm looking forward to having another day off with all three tomorrow. Maybe Horatio will come up during the day for a change. Another pattern I've noticed is that when he wants to be pet, he cries from the basement stairs and goes all the way back down to his "camp" to sit down and be pet. I have not been able to pet him during his upstairs visits yet. I hope to change that soon. My husband and I have also set a target date for full socialization, for his birthday, March 3. If things progress more quickly, we'll be happy, if not that's OK. The most important thing is that Horatio does not seem to be upset one bit about being indoors. He's adjusting really well to home life. He has even looked out of the windows and though you could tell he was recognizing places he used to roam, did not seem upset. Now, if I could just get Katie to believe that he's not a threat to her... Baby steps with our fur babies, I know.

Im so happy things are progressing for your fur family. Even if its one step forward and two steps back. My socialization of all my cats basically went...Ok got another kitty and throwing them all together and saying deal with it. I just made sure I gave them all equal attention thru out the day and played with them all. We still have territory issues but they know that mommy and daddy are the bosses and they have no choice but to get along and live dysfunctionally ever after...LOL...