sibling sadness

I'm new to this site and joined so I could maybe get an answer to this question.

Until Saturday my wife and I had two litter brothers. Stamford and Ichiro. They were almost identical, apart from the fact that Stamford was twice the weight of Ichiro (he just loved his food).

On Saturday morning I found Stamford dead outside our house, now I don't want to dwell on that as it's very hard to type and cry so I will move on to my question.

Has anyone got any advice on how to spot any sadness in Ichiro? He obviously will never know what happened, but I'm sure he knows that Stamford has been gone for too long. We decided to keep him indoors from now on so the crying at the window he is doing could be to go out.

Any advice you have would be most welcome.

David

David,

I am so sorry for your loss. As nuts as this sounds, the best way to deal with this, is just talk to Ichiro. Sit him on your lap and just tell him what happened. Animals know, and they need us to express it out to them. He may start pacing, crying, and scratching or become lethargic and withdrawn missing his buddy. If he stops eating, take him to the vet immediately!

I recently lost a lovely cat I had rescued over 4 years ago. I brought him and his brother up together. And when Shredder died, Kabota knew and was inconsolable. Because of my working with the sister site to this one, meowhoo.com I have had the opportunity to meet a lot of neat cat people. One animal communicator is among that group. I wrote her and told her what was going on, and she just advised me to talk to Kabota. To ask his permission first, but then just sit him facing me on his lap and talk to me. (I thought she was nuts) but I did it, and the next day Kabota was fine. He has since been more clingy with me, and asks me to let him wrap his paws around my neck at least 4 times a day to get a mom hug. I know I sound like a wacked crazy cat lady. But it worked for me!

I feel certain that Ichiro knows that Stamford is gone. Animals seem to sense those things. I'm guess that he is walking around the house crying and looking for Stamford.

Some years ago my show collie, Sari, was dying of Leukemia. I had two other collies and four cats. The vet told me the medication that took the swelling down would give her a few good days, and that we would know when her quality of life was gone. She seemed perfectly normal the next day, and I began to think the vet was wrong. She wasn't. Within days it happened. I was alone, except for the animals. Sari lay at my feet, almost helpless, and ALL the animals circled her. I'm certain they knew she was dying. I couldn't lift her into the car myself, so the "wake" continued until my son came home from work. He took her to the vet, very reluctantly. I talked to the animals through my tears, but I know that they had known for a long time that their friend and "mother" (she raised two kittens) was leaving them.

Whenever you feel a bit stronger, please tell us more about Stamford. Until then, there are some lovely stories posted here that I hope will be a comfort to you. God bless you and ease your pain.