Like an endless heart attack!

Moms are better than chicken soup. Feel better soon.

I hope you feel better soon from the surgery. Will you be incorporating an excercise regime??

I understand, Carol. When I had my hysterectomy six weeks ago, I was told, oh with laparascopic surgery there is less pain, faster healing time. Gaw!!!

I don't care what they say, it hurt soooooo bad afterwords, like everytime I moved, it was if something in my belly was tearing or going to fall out.

I hope there is someone to give your Mom some respite care. I get the impression she's not a young'un and you don't want her to get sick either.

Here's hoping you feel better VERY soon! You certainly don't need this on top of everything else right now.

How did I miss this? Sending many hugs and healing vibes
This type of pain has to be awful. Take good care of you!

Thank you all for your concern -- I'm doing much better now, even went without hydrocodone today, though I'll sure need it to sleep at night. All things considered, though, this is not so bad.

I'm slow, but I can do most anything now except bend over, so Mom is back to concentrating on Papa. That's a huge job, though... there are so many personal things that only she can do for him, y'know? I keep my bedroom door open a little so I can hear if he calls for us, but usually what he needs is something only Mom can handle. She's not getting a lot of sleep.

It'll be easier during the week, though, because we have the hospice people coming in every day. They bathe Papa and wash his hair, give him a shave, change his sheets, empty his catheter bag, and check all his vitals. So that will give Mom a big break for the new five days.

It's just incomprehensible to me that, three weeks ago, my father could still walk. Barely, with great difficulty...but he could still get up from his chair and walk with a cane, and generally take care of himself. But just this quickly, he's confined to bed, he has a Foley catheter, he has diapers... we have to really work at enticing him to eat... and he's semi-conscious most of the time. It's all happened so fast.

Oh wow Carol. This is a lot going on for you and your family. I will keep you and your parents in my prayers.

Those Hospice nurses are just amazing, caring, wonderful people. I really admire them....partly because I know I'm not strong enough to do the kind of necessary work that they do. They have hearts as big as can be, and patience that is never ending. Hugs to you and to your folks. I know how hard this must be...

That VitaLady site is great! Thank you so much!

My gosh, how did I miss this thread!?

Carol I hope you are back to good sometime very soon

I hope your feeling better quickly

Carol, you "sound" a lot perkier! I'm glad you're feeling good enough to go without the meds during the day.

I am just so, so sorry to hear about your Dad. I'm keeping your family in my prayers.



Laurie

Glad to hear you're doing better, but I'm sorry to hear about your dad. I hope your mum is doing ok, I bet she's doing it tough right now - lots of vibes!

Oh carol I didnt realize Hospice was there for your Dad. Sending so many prayers and vibes for your family right now. Many hugs to you.

Lots of recovery vibes for you

Big virtual hug ... b/c a real one might hurt!

I am so sorry to hear about your Dad. Best wishes...

I hope that you continue to improve!

I am so sorry about your father. I recently went through some very similar stuff, and I know how draining (in every imaginable way) it can be. I am keeping you and your family in my thoughts

You guys are so good to me... thank you for continuing to think of our family.

Mom and I went to see the oncologist yesterday to ask if we were doing the right thing. as it right to stop the chemo and go on hospice as we've done...or was there enough of a chance that the chemo might really make a difference that we should find some way to get him down there for the treatments anyway?

He said that there was perhaps a 5% to 10% chance that the chemo would lengthen Papa's life, but that was more than offset by the likelihood that it would make him even more miserable than he already is and possibly shorten his time by weakening him further in ways that have nothing to do with the cancer. He said if it was his family, he would do just what we've done, and enjoy the time we have, however short it may be.

We knew that, really, but we wanted to hear it clearly from him... because we didn't want to wake up down the road and think oh my god did we cause Papa to go earlier than he had to?

So... we're fully committed to the hospice plan now. As Amy (Momofmany) taught us, we're in the Love & Cheese Danish stage. Papa isn't much interested in food, but when we can entice him to eat, we're making sure it's something he loves... apple pie, bacon, fried green tomatoes, my homemade bread with sage and parmesan... I ought to get him some watermelon pickle, too, he used to love that. And his brother Gerald sent him some of his son's homemade honeys and syrups awhile back, and of course Papa couldn't have them, being diabetic... but now we can give him a little on homemade biscuits or pancakes and he'll love it. I'm also making him eggnog almost every night before bed -- using a vanilla Boost nutrition drink, some refrigerated Eggbeaters, vanilla and rum extracts, cinnamon, and nutmeg. He doesn't know the Boost is in there, so I feel dishonest, but it's helping him get proper nutrition.

I keep trying to think of other things he might enjoy. I know we have a scale model of a Piper L-4 like he flew in WWII somewhere, and if I can find it, I'll build it and hang it from the skylight in the living room, where he can see it. And we bought him a digital photo frame, too... I need to find a way to mount that where he can see it easily.

Do any other ideas occur to you?

Originally Posted by CarolPetunia

Do any other ideas occur to you?

Click to expand...

How about old time radio shows, that would be from his youth, young adult years? Radio Spirits (google the name sells these on cd. My dh loves these (Philip Marlowe etc.) so I buy them as presents for him.

Anything that is comedy from those years as well, nothing more special than a good laugh

We did the radio shows for my Gram when she was in her last year, and she adored them.

It sounds like you're doing everything you can to make him as happy and as comfortable as possible. Your love really shines through. It's just a situation that is just terrible, and my heart goes out to anyone who suffers as well as to the people that support them. Your pop is a very special person - and he's lucky to have you.



Laurie