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alternative to wedding bands

post #1 of 29
Thread Starter 
Hey there!
My boyfriend and I were talking about jewelery the other day and he told me that if we ever get married, he doesn't want to wear a wedding band because he finds rings terribly uncomfortable.
it got me thinking about what the alternatives might be...
Does anyone here an alternative to a wedding ring? Just curious
post #2 of 29
You could get something like the "Best Friends" heart that you gave to other friends in middle & high school. Just get something like a broken heart that says "Husband and wife".

Maybe he can a ring tattooed on his ring finger? Then he can NEVER take it off OK, maybe with laser surgery...
post #3 of 29
Does he have a pierced ear? You could each wear a matching diamond earring in one ear. Or how about matching key chains that have both of your initials intertwined? Or a necklace with a 1/2 heart on each that when put together make a whole one. Or what about his and hers ladies watches with your names and wedding date inscribed on the back?
post #4 of 29
maybe still get wedding bands but get a necklace to put is on to wear. Then you can still do the ring exchange at the wedding but then he wont have to wear it on his finger all the time.

Although I do like the tattoo idea LOL
post #5 of 29
How about necklaces/chains?
post #6 of 29
How about an engraved bracelet or a watch? Hehe, would be great if the watch could dual time the real time and countdown until your next anniversary!
post #7 of 29
I like the tattoo idea as well. There's this lady that does this Good Day LA morning show who got married and did the tattoo ring thing. I think it's a cute, current and creative alternative to the rings.
post #8 of 29
I like the ring on a chain and the tattoo idea. My step-dad has a chain for his that he keeps it on when he's working, though he can't wear a ring or a necklace just for safety reasons with his job. During DH's deployments I wore one of his rings on my necklace he gave me for our wedding. (We got 2 sets of rings, one is fancy and the other are just simple plain bands for working and things. Odd I know, but it was our compromise.)
post #9 of 29
We did the tattoo rings but also have a wedding set to wear to cover our tattoo's. His family is funny about a permanent wedding ring because, OMG! we could get divorced and he'd be stuck. (He told them it'd save him money next time he got married. LOL)

My parents have 2 sets of rings. A fancy "wear them out on the town" set and the "beat them up, eh, who cares" set.
post #10 of 29
Tell him to suck it up, wear the ring and get used to it. Then remind him that if you ever give birth to his children, that will be terribly uncomfortable.

Sorry, disregard that advice if it offends you.

post #11 of 29
My brother and SIL did the tatooed rings thing...but they're both really into tatoos, so it was perfect for them. My DH thought he wouldn't like wearing a ring, either. He always found it uncomfortable during his first marriage. But we got him one anyway, and he's now uncomfortable without it.
post #12 of 29
I don't recommend ring tattoos, or tattoos of partners' names either for that matter.

While we all hope for the fairy tale ending of "happily ever after" and that we have found our life mate when we marry, it's a well documented fact that more than 50% of marriages will end in divorce.

No one has a crystal ball into their future and therefore don't know what it holds for us.

However, a constant reminder of a love gone bad is not a good thing. Yes, tattoos can be removed, or altered, but removal also results in scarring which is often worse than the tattoo itself, and still a constant daily reminder.

Go with something "removable" like a wedding ring would be.

Also, not every guy wears a wedding ring, so there is also the option of him just giving you a wedding ring, or you both exchanging rings and him wearing it for the day of a wedding and then keeping it in a safe place in the house after that.
post #13 of 29
Does he want to wear anything that symbolizes marriage? Can he just have the wedding ring and not wear it but keep it in a jewelry box?

DH and I plan on having (when we find them) non-traditional rings. I have an ametheyst stone and want to find a double heart ring to put it in. DH wants an eagle ring with a diamond for the eye.

Right now we have no rings and are not in a big hurry to have one We know we are married and act it too - so we really don't need a ring on our fingers.
post #14 of 29
Originally Posted by GoldenKitty45 View Post
We know we are married and act it too - so we really don't need a ring on our fingers.
Exactly. The ring isn't what makes the marriage, it's just a symbol for public show to tell the world you are married. The important thing is how you each feel inside about each other, not some trinket that you wear on your hand or other part of the body.

Speaking of other parts of the body, here is another suggestion of ideas for symbols in place of finger rings. Rings can be worn on other parts of the body. I already suggested an earring, but what about:

Matching toe rings?
Matching Nipple Rings?
Matching Belly Button Rings?
post #15 of 29
Thread Starter 
I read somewhere about someone who got a ring, and then had it flattened so it'd lay across his body on a chain...liked that.
Also I like the idea of watches, because he really likes them and I love a good watch.
Having mixed things doesn't bother me either, like if i got a ring and we got him a pendant with a similar theme...or even a chain or a bracelet.
I don't like the tattoo idea either. I teased him saying that his could just be the word "taken" across his body lol.
The more I think about it, the more I realize that I just want him to have something that communicates the connection between us to other people...so yeah, I'd like him to have a something, but rings aren't necessary (at least for him, I haven't decided about me).
Either way we're far from marriage (even though he asks me at least once a month) and will have a few years to discuss our choices. So far we're having a pretty strange wedding, with kilts, cuz I think it's sexy and dragon goblets for us to drink from and all kinds of eccentric stuff. Suits me just fine!
post #16 of 29
I know that it's traditional for husband and wife to have something between them that signifies their bond with each other to the rest of the world..... but some couples don't bother at all. What really matters more than anything else is that you are together and that you love each other. I like the idea of matching bracelets though. That's pretty sweet. I've been lucky because in mainland Europe, it's fairly common (especially among Danes) to wear matching engagement rings and then keep them as their weding rings. Rune has expressed his dislike of wearing rings, but he has decided that he wants a wedding ring... so we decided to do things the british way instead

I'm not sure about the tattooed rings... although it's incredibly sentimental, it would really be a bad thing *if* things went wrong. Look at Pam Anderson and Tommy Lee....
post #17 of 29
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by LilleKat View Post
in mainland Europe, it's fairly common (especially among Danes) to wear matching engagement rings and then keep them as their weding rings.
My parents didn't have engagement rings, so I grew up thinking that one only has a wedding ring. They wanted to save the money for the engagement and get hand made wedding ones. Good thing too...they both still love them after 25 years.
Ryan has already decided that he's going to propose to me with a motorcycle, so the engagement ring is right out I'm not sure how I'm supposed to "show off to the ladies though"...maybe I'll just get my riding gloves gemstone studded lol.
post #18 of 29
Studded gloves.... love that - perhaps one day we'll see you riding down the road with "Just Hitched" studded into the back of a leather jacket huh?
post #19 of 29
Yea, I can see where I'm going to regret my tattooed wedding band. After 11 years of marriage (celebrating today. And 13 years together) we might divorce tomorrow. LOL

I'm not saying it's the best idea in the world, though. We got it done last year on our 10th anniversary. Up until then, it was a plain band for me and nothing for him. His idea, though to have it done. Mine says Wife, his says Husband. Nothing fancy, no names, nothing. Just the words.
post #20 of 29
I like the matching tattoo idea. Of course this isn't a good idea if you don't think your marriage is going to last.
post #21 of 29
Ah Chrissy, this is where you were smart - you waited 10 years first!! And even smarter still - you used the words "husband" and "wife" instead of each others names.... let's face it, even if the unthinkable did happen after 20, 30 years - who know - those bands would work again elsewhere too! That's serious recycling! LOL

Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to be sarcastic or offensive or obnoxious or whatever, (however I am slightly cynical after my parents divorced after 22 years, and my uncle and aunt after 28 so I tend to have slightly reserved judgements) I do really think you two made some sensible decisions regarding tattoed bands I feel a bit wary about expressing this particular opinion - so I hope no-one is offended.
post #22 of 29
To tell you the truth, he probably never would have thought of tattooed bands if it wasn't for a "friend" of his. Mike wanted to go with our names but my Dad always said to never have someones name tattooed on your body. (He's even against having your kids' name tattooed just in case they dissappointed you. LOL) So I said sure but "husband" and "wife". That's why he tells his family he can "re-use" it if we ever divorce and save himself some money. LOL
post #23 of 29
Heheheh your dad is a wise man! I don't agree on the kids name's though - I think that's really cute. I do in fact have my fiance's name tattooed on my belly (that was 6 years ago when I was younger and more stupid!) I'm currently tattooing over an image that had significance though.... i can tell you now that it hurts! I decided to go with the one thing I'll never STOP loving in life. Another CAT!! I want more pawprints too, but once the backpiece is finished, I think I'm going to have to stop..... little does my beloved know, my cat will be sitting in a garden of lillies (it's a play on words "lily cat" which is my nickname everywhere, instead of Lille Kat (little cat))
post #24 of 29
My fiance isn't big into rings either. Although, he's picked out something he wants and the only time he isn't going to wear it [or so he says] is at work (he works on transmissions, and rings get caught on things, beat up, etc. His boss nearly lost his finger when his band got stuck on one of the machines there). We also are planning on having just plain bands tattooed around our ring fingers in the future. No words, names, etc.

If he will wear a necklace, buy him a band to put on it. I'm one of those people who want to show something in public like rings to show that we are married I'm having a plain white gold band to go w/ my engagement ring.
post #25 of 29
When my hubby and I were engaged, he was absolutely set against wearing a ring. He wanted one for the ceremony itself, but he said that he wouldn't wear it. I told him that he didn't have to wear his if I didn't have to wear mine (we are both welders and wearing rings and other jewelery is a baaaad idea). So we do wear our rings on the weekends occasionally, but even if we don't wear them, we still know that we are married. He wears his ring a lot more than I wear mine..lol
post #26 of 29
I haven't read all of the replies but thought I would add my own

My in-laws don't wear their wedding bands. They both work in a factory and their wedding set is in a safe. They can't wear them for safety reasons at work.

Also, my uncle worked in a steel plant for most of the time my aunt and uncle have been married. He couldn't wear his wedding band. He promised her when he retired he would wear it every day. And he has every day since he retired.

My own husband had a few jobs where he couldn't wear his wedding band. He wasn't any less married to me for not wearing his ring. Although I was on when he could wear it again.
post #27 of 29
My late husband was a mechanic and automotive electrician and didn't wear his ring, either. He put it on, when we went out. Afte he retired, the only time that he took it off, was when he was working on our own cars.

My Pops is the same way - no ring, while he's working.
post #28 of 29
I wish I even had the option to wear a ring! My SO bought be a ring and we've had to resize it twice! Its now a size 4 and LOOSE on me! I fear that they cant make a ring that will ever fit on my finger!
post #29 of 29
Originally Posted by Ethereal View Post
I wish I even had the option to wear a ring! My SO bought be a ring and we've had to resize it twice! Its now a size 4 and LOOSE on me! I fear that they cant make a ring that will ever fit on my finger!

Tell me about it! When Rob bought me my ring, it was a size 7. He knew it was WAY too big, but they were so busy with the holiday rush (he bought it in December 2006 to give it to me in February 2007), they wouldn't have had it back in time. I put teflon tape on the back to hold it snug for about a week after he proposed. I got it sized to a 4, and it STILL turns on my finger quite often. But 3½ was too small for my finger ... I'm stuck in the middle ... a 3.75 maybe?!

I wear my ring while working, but I also wear gloves over it (required at my job - working with acids and chemicals and such). I won't mind Rob not wearing his ring at work (although, my dad has worn his for the last 25 years working on cars. Has had some issues with getting stuff under it and burning himself though!), I just would like him to wear it when we go out on weekends and stuff He hasn't said "no", so I'm taking it as a good sign!

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