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Help! Kitties must be friends

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 
i am getting a kitten from a friend. i already have a kitty that my roommate found in an alley. she is about 1 year old and is very sweet but very violent when she feels threatened due to her life in da hood (i took my girlfriend's cat over to meet her and it was not good).She is attached to me like crazy and just follows me around the house. i am worried she will not like shared attention especially since a kitten would bother her all the time. i really am scared she will hurt the new kitten. how can they be friends? will i just have to wait until it can defend itself and they become friends from being equals? (i witnessed this from seeing it happen when my parent's cat had to deal with a new boston terrierin the family) would it make a difference if they were both girls or should i get a male kitten?
post #2 of 13
One thing I always say is trust your instincts when it comes to cats. Your concerns for your kitty accepting a new kitten in your home are valid and very possibly right on. So if you are going to bring a kitten into your home you are going to want to take all precautions and follow the introduction steps. To be fare to them, you want to make sure you have the schedule to devote time to both for a few months. May I ask why you are getting another kitten? Only since it seems you have a fury buddy already who might object..........
post #3 of 13
Thread Starter 
i'm pretty sure that current kitty is going to stay when i leave and i also want her to have a friend anyway. plus what is better than a kitty? two!
post #4 of 13
Thread Starter 
but what should i do right away...like if she is very defensive. i know that if i can get her guard down it will be okay...should i hold her and have small doses of contact? i mean i dunno i'm just trying to make sure no one gets hurt
post #5 of 13
What you need to do is a formal introduction, as described here:- http://www.thecatsite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=67321. It involves keeping the cats separate from each other at first, and gradually introducing them... but read it to learn how. It's also important to know that female cats tend to be more territorial than males with each other, may only see the other one as a threat and never get to be 'friends', whereas if the new one you bring in were a younger male kitten, they might have a better chance, but not necessarily. WHY are you bringing in another one? "Company" is not always the answer to a cat being alone - not if the company ends up being way more stressful than otherwise. Cats can manage alone (if occasionally lonely) especially if they have interaction with you when you are around (or whoever will be).
post #6 of 13
Cats introductions are NOT like dog introductions! It takes weeks and months to adjust - not just a one or two time thing. Females do tend to be more territorial then males and take longer to adjust to a new cat/kitten.

However, as long as both are spayed/neutered you will have an easier time. The kitten needs some time to adjust just being in a house and not on the streets. She's used to having to fight for everything so she will take a lot longer to adjust to things.

If you can "tame" down the kitten first before introducing the cat, things will go smoother. If you feel you can't handle that, then take her to a shelter and pick out a kitten that is more suitable.

I find that M/F or M/M will work out better then 2 F's but it depends on the cats involved. If you decide not to adopt the kitten from the streets, then find a laid back male kitten/cat to be friends with your female cat.
post #7 of 13
In their natural habitat the domestic cat's closest wild cat relatives, the female's territory does not have any overlap with another female's, they do not share any mutual space. Female and male territories do have overlap, with a male territory overlapping parts of several females territories.

For this reason, it is most difficult to introduce a female into an existing female's home. Your resident female will likely accept a male kitten more easily. Not saying it would be impossible with a female kitten, but acceptance and peace may take longer

Of course make sure all are neutered/spayed for the best chance of harmony, raging hormones will complicate things, and if getting a male there is a chance they can get an unspayed female pregnant as young as 4 or 5 months old!
post #8 of 13
Read the Sticky at the top of this forum Have a Behavior Problem - Look here 1st. There are a couple of threads for introducing cats.
post #9 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by Larke View Post
What you need to do is a formal introduction, as described here:- http://www.thecatsite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=67321.


There are a lot of good pointers in that link. The thing to remember also is that your two new cats may not be the bestest of friends, even after the introductory period. Consider yourself lucky if they tolerate each other.

I grew up as a dog person and never knew much about cats before I got luna. When B and I moved in together between Luna and his 2 cats, that was probably the most stressful 6 months ever.

Then a year later we got Whitey and then it was another stressful 6 months.
post #10 of 13
Does your present cat like:
  • furniture arrangements and daily routines to stay the same?
  • loves to spend her time contemplating things rather than rearranging or manipulating them?
  • has a "run and hide" response to new input, such as a friend coming over, a lot of new activity in a particular room, or just you're doing something new or acquiring something new?

If the answers are "yes," then a new kitten is SO not indicated. Even a kitten who will grow up to be the same way will upset routines, garner a lot of inevitable attention, and be what the existing cat sees as disruptive, just by virtue of being a kitten.

A very laid back adult male, the kind who just wants to be a lump in your lap, is a much better candidate for a second cat in this situation I described.
post #11 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by Werebear View Post
  • furniture arrangements and daily routines to stay the same?
  • loves to spend her time contemplating things rather than rearranging or manipulating them?
  • has a "run and hide" response to new input, such as a friend coming over, a lot of new activity in a particular room, or just you're doing something new or acquiring something new?
Well, those are pretty normal traits for most cats; I wouldn't make a decision on adopting a new cat based on those criteria, else nobody would ever get more than one cat.
post #12 of 13
Thread Starter 
well thanks everyone. i am a cat lover but not so much experienced owner so a place like this is always amazing to turn to.
post #13 of 13
my cat Bea is a .
always has been.

It takes her MONTHS to "sorta" adjust to another cat. and a few more months to be "okay" with another cat.
some cats will never get along and you can't make them.

The best thing you can do is give them all lots of attention and patience and make them all feel safe.
it will eventually pay off. at the very least they will eventually leave each other alone.

good luck...
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