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post #31 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by lunasmom View Post
If they're underdressed all the time (I.e. including running to the store in a pajamas at 1:00pm in the afternoon) then they don't care about themselves and they probably don't care about a lot about appearances or much else in their life.
Either that, or they care a heck of a lot more about comfort than what other people think of them.

Based on a LOT of these responses, you all would come to completely wrong judgements about me!

For example, we already know I get dirty fingernails. I also do not wear make-up, or do my hair, or wear fancy shoes or clothing OR jewelry. I walk really fast with a purpose, and I wear quiet shoes or go barefoot - which means my feet are usually dirty. I have never had a pedicure in my life and I never plan to.

I have gone shopping in the middle of the day in my flannel PJ bottoms with a T-shirt and my UGGs.

My teeth are a nightmare and I spend thousands just to ATTEMPT to keep them. I am not proud of my smile - I was a smoker for 24 years and had poor nutrition for half that because I was so poor when I was raising my child. (She ate first, but yes, I bought my smokes before I would eat - that's the result of the addiction that I have now happily broken free from.)

I don't EVER iron clothing and I don't care if I have wrinkles on my clothes as long as they aren't TOO bad - my face has wrinkles, too!

I'm sorry, this is NOT meant to be a slam to anyone, but if people want to judge who I am as a human based on those superficialities, then those are people I really don't care to have in my life!



I'm really finding this thread amusing!!!

Who I REALLY am is not reflected by my appearance whatsoever. I have an IQ that got me into MENSA, I have survived hardships that most people would rather die first than try to live through, I am a volunteer fundraiser/event organizer and have helped to raise over $250 K for those less fortunate than myself over the last 7 years.

I think you can tell a LOT more about a person by the books they have on their bookcase than you can by the way that they appear physically or superficially.
post #32 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by SwampWitch View Post
Either that's a very gross generalization, or I'm the exception to the rule. I always wear very quiet shoes, because I don't like to announce my arrival with my feet. Yet I'm definitely not introverted. I'm confident, honest, and outgoing, and I walk very fast. I'm not shy or violent in the least!

I just like quiet shoes!
Oh I never meant it as a rule. I used a very key word, "tend". Of course there are always exceptions to the rule. Even in your case though it tends to make sense since you have a mix of the two extremes and your personality sounds pretty balanced.

Quote:
Originally Posted by strange_wings View Post
Does it throw everything off if the person limps or walks weird?
And what if they're just in a hurry?
Yep, limping would throw a monkey wrench into things. Walking in a hurry... there's different ways people do that too. There's those who sprint, those who jog, those who powerwalk, and those that just take their time no matter. Each of them says something about a person.
post #33 of 52
Thread Starter 
I didn't mean for anyone to be offended by this thread.

Whether we mean to (or want to) or not we all make some sort of judgment or assumption about people the first time we meet them. Thats why first impressions are so important. Of course you SHOULD get to know that person before holding them to your judgments or assumptions.

I didn't mean to make it sound like I wouldn't ever socialize with someone who has dirty fingernails, thats just one of the first things I notice about people. I have a couple of friends whose nails are always hideous (for no good reason) but they are very good friends. It bugs me, but it doesn't mean that they are bad people. I wasn't being a snob!


I don't immediately put someone off because of their appearance, I guess I should have titled this thread "The first thing I notice about a person is their..." because thats really more of what I meant.
post #34 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by miao_kitty View Post
You can tell a lot about a person by their feet. I don't know why it is but I ALWAYS look at a person's feet. What kind of shoes they wear, if their shoes match their outfit, if their feet are gross or whatever.
One day I went to work wearing one black shoe and one brown shoe. It was early in the morning and dark when I left okay?! So what does that say about me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by valanhb View Post
You can tell a lot about a person by how they treat the "help" - whether that is the receptionist in an office (on the phone or in person), the wait-staff in a restaurant, or any other blue collar job.
I totally agree. I find it intolerable when people think that they're "above" certain other people, and if someone is rude for no reason (well, not that there's ever a reason to be rude) I know that they're not a person I would choose to spend any time with.
post #35 of 52
You can tell alot about a person by there...

HOUSE! You can see how they spoil their fur/skin kids, their level of cleanliness, and if your super nosey you can find out what movies they like, foods, ect, ect... You will also be able to tell if this is a very busy person or someone who stays at home....
post #36 of 52
lol really folks, you cant really judge anyone by there looks.
the outside is just that. It does not really tell you what is really in there.

lol Even my wife said that if had not gotten to know me on the internet first,
she would never have talked to me, AS that i did not look like her type.
as she said, i look scary.
post #37 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonnie1965 View Post
I've learned that when I make snap judgements about people, it really says more about me than it does about them
That is great! I agree, but I really can learn a lot about someone by eye contact
post #38 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by KatKisses View Post
HOUSE! You can see how they spoil their fur/skin kids, their level of cleanliness, and if your super nosey you can find out what movies they like, foods, ect, ect... You will also be able to tell if this is a very busy person or someone who stays at home....
I love seeing a person's house for the first time. I always feel as though you can never really understand someone until you see where and how they live. (Also, I'm just generally nosy about things like that... )
post #39 of 52
I think you can tell alot about a person by the car they drive.
I drive a Ford Focus Hatchback, and to me it says I'm practical, no frills, and don't give a sh*t what people think. (And I don't spend as much on gas as those who drive the environmentally UNfriendly SUVs).
post #40 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonnie1965 View Post
I've learned that when I make snap judgements about people, it really says more about me than it does about them
This is my favorite reply!
post #41 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by theimp98 View Post
lol really folks, you cant really judge anyone by there looks.
the outside is just that. It does not really tell you what is really in there.

lol Even my wife said that if had not gotten to know me on the internet first,
she would never have talked to me, AS that i did not look like her type.
as she said, i look scary.
I think I know what you mean. Depending on the day you meet me, and the mood I'm in, and how comfortable I'm in my skin, you can get a very different impression of me.

For example, I swear, an awful, awful lot, but most people don't notice, because I don't "look" like the kind of person who does, even I do it quite often in front of them. I've also had people tell me that I shouldn't care so much much about being a girly-girl because I'm not, and that's okay. Of course it's okay! I can wear purple satin and know how to sharpen a knife - it's not a zero sum game! I'm a genius, so people get confused when they realise that I can't always tell the letter 'f' from the letter 'v' - it's obvious that I'm smart, but it's not obvious that I'm dyslexic.

I had an Italian (as in, from Italy) lecturer in my sophmore year in college. My classmates complained constantly about not being able to understand her. I have a fraction of normal hearing, and I had no problem understanding her. On the other hand, political economy is made of boring. Which do you think was the real problem?
post #42 of 52
A whole lot of you would judge me based on what I look like... my clothes are always wrinkled, I don't even own an iron. I wear men's undershirts (the pocket kind-- but at least they are the colored kind, not white) to work. I wash my hair maybe one or two times a week because it is very dry. I get called a 'dirty hippy' on a regular basis. My nails are clean but a strange mishmash of lengths. PS, no I don't smell, I shower daily if not more and wear deodorant and I shave the appropriate areas...

But to let you all know, I care about everything in my life. I just don't have time or money to care about crap that doesn't matter. Then again, I'm not trying to enter into the professional office world either-- it's not for me, I'm not for it.

I am a snap-decision judgement maker. I can't describe what I base that judgement on though... it's usually right, but I never can describe what it is.
post #43 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zissou'sMom View Post
I am a snap-decision judgement maker. I can't describe what I base that judgement on though... it's usually right, but I never can describe what it is.
Humans are pattern matches. Most animals are.

Clearly, your brain is good at it

For your purposes, at least, and that's really all any of us can hope for.
post #44 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by menasmom View Post
I think you can tell alot about a person by the car they drive.
I drive a Ford Focus Hatchback, and to me it says I'm practical, no frills, and don't give a sh*t what people think. (And I don't spend as much on gas as those who drive the environmentally UNfriendly SUVs).
Mmm... while I do somewhat agree, I think the way people drive shows more about them than what type of car they drive. Plus if you're like me, outwardly it'll appear that I drive an old clunker car, but if you take a peek under the hood you'll see something that shouldn't even be possible

and SUV's?! SUV's are so out of style, CUV's are the hot thing now.
post #45 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bonnie1965 View Post
I've learned that when I make snap judgements about people, it really says more about me than it does about them
that is so true, what do the shrink people call it.....transferrance or something

well lets see

tattoos..........nah ! cos I've got one and loads of people are very surprised and usually say they didnt think I was the sort of person to have one

how much flesh someone shows no comment

the books they read, awh well the list goes on and on !!
post #46 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by mooficat View Post
that is so true, what do the shrink people call it.....transferrance or something
It's called Projection: the things people can't stand the most about other people are generally the qualities or characteristics they they themselves possess but are in denial about.

I learned that in Psych 101.
post #47 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Satai View Post
Humans are pattern matches. Most animals are.

Clearly, your brain is good at it

For your purposes, at least, and that's really all any of us can hope for.
Wouldn't it also be considered stereotyping? Actually perhaps pattern matching is a better term. I.e. if I had a friend that dressed bohemian and was a vegatarian, who only showered once a week, etc I would immediately associate anyone else dress bohemian based on what I know.
post #48 of 52
you can tell alot about a person by how they treat people who don't have influence over them.

some people are rude to waitstaff, doormen, cab drivers, orderlies, receptionist , bus drivers etc and I think if they cant be polite or civil to strangers they, in the long run, wont remain civil to those they are close to. JMO
post #49 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Abigail View Post
you can tell alot about a person by how they treat people who don't have influence over them.

some people are rude to waitstaff, doormen, cab drivers, orderlies, receptionist , bus drivers etc and I think if they cant be polite or civil to strangers they, in the long run, wont remain civil to those they are close to. JMO
Dave Barry quote:
"A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person."
post #50 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lemur 6 View Post
Mmm... while I do somewhat agree, I think the way people drive shows more about them than what type of car they drive. Plus if you're like me, outwardly it'll appear that I drive an old clunker car, but if you take a peek under the hood you'll see something that shouldn't even be possible

and SUV's?! SUV's are so out of style, CUV's are the hot thing now.
Okay, color me stupid. What in God's name is a CUV??? I can't even think of what the "C" might stand for.... HELP!!!
post #51 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by menasmom View Post
Okay, color me stupid. What in God's name is a CUV??? I can't even think of what the "C" might stand for.... HELP!!!
C is for Crossover. CUV = Crossover Utility Vehicle. They're the answer to gas hungry SUV's. They tend to be slightly smaller than SUV's, but have the gas mileage and handling characteristics of small cars and sedans with the space and people carrying capacity of a SUV.

Honda's new CR-V is a good example. So is the Acura MDX. Not too familiar with other companies, but I'm sure you can easily name a dozen examples.
post #52 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by lunasmom View Post
Wouldn't it also be considered stereotyping? Actually perhaps pattern matching is a better term. I.e. if I had a friend that dressed bohemian and was a vegatarian, who only showered once a week, etc I would immediately associate anyone else dress bohemian based on what I know.
I probably shouldn't even be trying to do this; I'm working on my BD thesis, so I'm completely "why is the rum always gone?" drunk.

Stereotyping is part of the pattern matching phenomena, and is superstition - both are faults of the process, as I understand it. The correct explaination is almost certainly more nuanced, but the basics of the situation are this (apparently):

1. An animal eats a red berry
2. It makes them sick
3. They do not risk eating red berries in future.
4. They survive and pass this behaviour on to their young
5. Their young do not eat red berries either.

The downsides - and upsides - of this process are probably obvious, so I won't bore anyone with their details.
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