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Rules for buying gifts for men

post #1 of 18
Thread Starter 
Rules for Buying Gifts for Men

Rule #1: When in doubt - buy him a cordless drill. It does not
matter if he already has one. I have a friend who owns 17
and he has yet to complain. As a man, you can never have
too many cordless drills. No one knows why.

Rule #2: If you cannot afford a cordless drill, buy him anything
with the word ratchet or socket in it. Men love saying
those two words. "Hey George, can I borrow your ratchet?"
"OK. By-the-way, are you through with my 3/8-inch socket
yet?" Again, no one knows why.

Rule #3: If you are really, really broke, buy him anything for his
car. A 99-cent ice scraper, a small bottle of de-icer or
something to hang from his rear view mirror. Men love
gifts for their cars. No one knows why.

Rule #4: Do not buy men socks. Do not buy men ties. And never buy
men bathrobes. I was told that if God had wanted men to
wear bathrobes, he wouldn't have invented Jockey shorts.

Rule #5: You can buy men new remote controls to replace the ones
they have worn out. If you have a lot of money buy your
man a big-screen TV with the little picture in the corner.
Watch him go wild as he flips, and flips, and flips.

Rule #6: Do not buy any man industrial-sized canisters of after-
shave or deodorant. I'm told they do not stink - they are

Rule #7: Buy men label makers. They are almost as good as cordless
drills. Within a couple of weeks there will be labels
absolutely everywhere. "Socks. Shorts. Cups. Saucers.
Door. Lock. Sink." You get the idea. No one knows why.

Rule #8: Never buy a man anything that says "some assembly
required" on the box. It will ruin his Special Day and he
will always have parts left over.

Rule #9: Good places to shop for men include Northwest Iron Works,
Parr Lumber, Home Depot, John Deere, Valley RV Center, and
Les Schwab Tire. NAPA Auto Parts and Sears' Clearance
Centers are also excellent men's stores. It doesn't matter
if he doesn't know what it is. "From NAPA Auto, eh? Must
be something I need. Hey! Isn't this a starter for a '68
Ford Fairlane? Wow! Thanks."

Rule #10: Men enjoy danger. That's why they never cook-but they will
barbecue. Get him a monster barbecue with a 100-pound
propane tank. Tell him the gas line leaks. "Oh the thrill!
The challenge! Who wants a hamburger?"

Rule #11: Tickets to a football game are a smart gift. However, he
will not appreciate tickets to "A Retrospective of 19th
Century Quilts." Everyone knows why.

Rule #12: Men love chainsaws. Never, ever, buy a man you love a
chainsaw. If you don't know why-please refer to Rule #8
and what happens when he gets a label maker.

Rule #13: It's hard to beat a really good wheelbarrow or an aluminum
extension ladder. Never buy a real man a step ladder. It
must be an extension ladder. No one knows why.

Rule #14: Rope. Men love rope. It takes us back to our cowboy
origins, or at least The Boy Scouts. Nothing says love
like a hundred feet of 3/8" manila rope. No one knows why
post #2 of 18
:LOL: That gives me some good ideas for Christmas!!
post #3 of 18
My hubby loves putting things together - it can keep him busy for hours which is good for me too!
post #4 of 18
Oh, the drill thing is SO true!! We have 3 right now, Earl isn't a handy man. He's already shown me a commercial for the next one he wants. It swivels for those "hard to reach" places.

What's funny is that my father always has the most practical Christmas list in the world. This year, he wanted socks, Chapstick, a belt, and cleaning brushes for his competitive rifle. That was typical for all through my childhood. Shopping for Dad is easy, but getting him something not on the list is difficult.
post #5 of 18
I, still, get a kick out of the year that my dad got a waffle iron and a sewing machine. THAT'S what he wanted! Mom can't cook or sew but the old man is a whiz!

The closest thing for Bill, on that list, is the toolbox, that I got him for his truck. Bill feels naked, without a toolbox!

BTW - he LOVES the robe that I bought him, last year.
post #6 of 18
That was good! Thanks!
post #7 of 18
I loved that! Also, anything with the name "Dremel" on it really turns men on.
post #8 of 18
Dremel??? Jake was drooling over the dremel stand at the store. What is it about tools and men? the more they have, the better they feel?
post #9 of 18
You've been in my garage?! I think my sweetie has 2 of every tool and gadget known to man!
post #10 of 18
Thread Starter 
It's sad, but I'VE been asking for tools for Christmas for the last few years. Dad is an engineer, and I grew up learning how to fix most basic things. My dream tool is the battery-powered tool which can put in screws AND saw off nails. Dad hasn't taken the hint yet!
post #11 of 18
We're going to Home Depot, today to check out B & D's Navigator hand saw. It looks like its just what we need, for trimming the tree in our front yard and cutting up mesquite for our BBQ.
post #12 of 18
Went to lowes last night and Jake was just drooling over the skil drills and saws etc - he liked the little lights on them. LOL
post #13 of 18
For many years, my mom carried a list of "most wanted tools" in her wallet. Christmas, birthday, Fathers' Day and anniversary, my dad could count on getting a tool.
post #14 of 18
Ok, I am cracking up here. Last weekend, I took my kids Xmas shopping for their friends and father (my ex-husband). My son was hell-bent on getting his dad that new Black and Decker gizmo that helps you hang things up level with a laser light line. (I hope you've seen the commercial). Well, the damn thing is nowhere to be found. It's apparently as hot an item for men as PokeMon was for kids a couple of years ago. Not to mention, I heard the thing was about 60 bucks. I told my son (age 14) that $60 was waaay too much for him to spend anyway. One guy at one store said if he got his hands on one, he's sell it on eBay - that's how rare they are. Anyway, we ended up finding a knock-off version at Sears. The big joke is that Anthony had to find this gift because that's what his father said he wanted. The even bigger joke is that there isn't a single thing hung up on the walls of their house. What he "needs" that thing so badly for is beyond my wildest imagination.
post #15 of 18
Yesterday as we were going out of town, there was a huge sign "TOOL SALE!" Mike looked at me like a little boy who just discovered his first bicycle under the Christmas tree and asked me if we could stop? We were early for our appointments, so I told him "sure we can!"

The sale was inside the American Legion Hall and it was jammed packed with men. We went through all the aisles, and at the very end of it, Mike had no tools, and I had found a really nice magnifiyer clamp on lamp, a carbide tip, and a small c-clamp- all for me for my scrim table! LOL

We then ended up going to Harbor Frieght after our appointments and Mike bought a new grinder for the shop. The motor of his other one burnt out. He had that one grinder for 25 years! So I guess, I am as bad as the guys when it comes to tools- because I like them, and I like having them. Last year, Mike bought me my own tool chest! LOL
post #16 of 18
I know about those traveling tool sales. I have two framing hammers, in my kitchen drawer, bought years ago at one. Bill is fond of Harbor Freight, too.

When my dad passes on, my brothers will have a field day: he has THREE big roll-around tool boxes, chock-full of lovingly cared-for tools. Some of this stuff is over 50 years old. This is on top of a big shed full of yard tools and his airless paint sprayer (another Christmas gift).
post #17 of 18
I went to blockbusters this morning and what do you know, we make a detour to Lowes. Jake really wanted one of those battery operated screwdrivers that are selling for only $5.97. Not too bad but it came one day too late as we took 4 hours yesterday putting together a new desk. We also have a new pooter and the keyboard is hard for me to use as I am used to those ergonomic ones that are bent in the middle. Walmart has great deals on HP computers (another toy that Jake MUST have!!!)
post #18 of 18
We went to Home Depot, yesterday. Our back porch light shorted out and we needed a new one. We wound up buying a new one, for the front, too.

They had this really great multi-setting shower massage - better than the one that I have. Unfortunately, I can't countenance paying $60.00, for a shower head.

I DID price that handsaw, for Bill. $60.00 is OK, for that. I'm going to check WalMart's price, first.
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