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cliques  

post #1 of 24
Thread Starter 
ever since a thread on this topic i have become more aware of how some people get "frozen out" by the clique of old time users and it has dampened my interest in the site. i agree that no one is ever overtly nasty -- and am glad of that -- but there is a subtle thing that feels uncomfortable. anyone else notice it?
post #2 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Abigail View Post
ever since a thread on this topic i have become more aware of how some people get "frozen out" by the clique of old time users and it has dampened my interest in the site. i agree that no one is ever overtly nasty -- and am glad of that -- but there is a subtle thing that feels uncomfortable. anyone else notice it?
So do I and I have been here for years!
post #3 of 24
I haven't noticed that. But then again, I'm used to being the voice of dissent. I'm always pleasantly surprised when someone answers my threads.
post #4 of 24
not really nope. Oh i know some people wont respond to my post, how others will. Why does it matter? i am here for fun and to learn more about cats, and to see some pics(there are some here that take very good pics of there cats) oh yea, and to waste time at work when things are slow.
post #5 of 24
I haven't noticed it, but I have been accused to being quite oblivious to things like that.
post #6 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Arlyn View Post
I haven't noticed it, but I have been accused to being quite oblivious to things like that.
I guess I haven't noticed it either.
post #7 of 24
I read the thread on this in IMO section

http://www.thecatsite.com/forums/sho...d.php?t=117767

Quite interesting

I think people, by and large, on here are great, personally. Old timers will have formed friends from the earlier days, thats expected. But i find them welcoming of the newcomers.
post #8 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by SwampWitch View Post
I haven't noticed that. But then again, I'm used to being the voice of dissent. I'm always pleasantly surprised when someone answers my threads.
hey now, i almost always answers your posts
post #9 of 24
some days when i'm being overly sensitive i feel that way but as a rule i don't...
post #10 of 24
I personally haven't noticed anything. I understand that it can be quite intimidating for a newbie to jump in, but that's really what you have to do. I was a little nervous when I first joined too, and it took me a while to join in, but I decided just go for it and did. And so many people make a point of going into the New Cats on the Block forum to welcome the newcomers, so they should just jump in. Everyone is welcome - please, no one should feel intimidated. We welcome all!
post #11 of 24
There are cliques everywhere.

I try not to let it affect me. That's easier to do online than off though.

When people have been a member of a site for a long time, or find that they have a huge amount of things in common with someone, those people tend to gravitate into off board discussions and build friendships which will obviously be evident on the forums.

My only recommendation to you is just come here, post, have fun, answer or ask questions and partake in the forums, threads and topics that interest you and don't worry about what everyone else is doing.

You can also take a first step and reach out via PM and initiate continued or more indepth discussion with people if you feel that you have something more to offer then but are shy about posting it on the forums, or if you have a question that goes beyond the scope of the thread topic etc. That's a good way to make online friends.
post #12 of 24
I think because I don't get on here all that often I don't really notice it. I am on alot in the evenings and post when and where I can, but with working all day I don't really notice the groups that have formed on here.

Like someone else said I am here to get my kitty questions answered and chat with some like-minded kitty folk.
post #13 of 24
its prob just a thing of people having formed friends already.Im new here and sometimes feel ignored.but not new in other places-forums,real life places etc and dont get ignored.I read the other thread some people are seriously pset by this-but i guess some things never change.Again im sure some people are deliberately ignoring as well.
post #14 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Renovia View Post
some days when i'm being overly sensitive i feel that way but as a rule i don't...
Same here!!!!
post #15 of 24
I do worry sometimes as ive only been here 8 months, that the older users know so much about eachother and have met eachother. There are some really good friendships here, and i just hope that when ive been here alot longer that everyone will know i love being here and its an important part of my life. It helps to know that when something bad happens to me, or to someone else we all come together and support one another. I think it's also because im 23, i am one of the younger people here. And i do actually get along better with people out of my age group, i just hope the people who are in my parents age group dont think im out of my depth or not mature enough to talk to.

God i ramble
post #16 of 24
I haven't really noticed any "cliques". I think a more accurate way to describe it is that some people have been members longer or they're more active member so they know each other better. Obviously if you know someone well your going to gravitate towards talking to them more. I haven't been a member all that long, but I find everyone on here to be very friendly and welcoming. When I ask for advice, or post a topic there are always plenty of replies. I don't think anyone purposely shuts anyone else out.
post #17 of 24
well maybe it helps to know that just because you or i post something in a thread and no one seem to respond to it means it was not noticed.
like the question i posted the other about why you like cats. I did read all the response in. but really i cant resond to all,

if that makes sense.
post #18 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by LokisMum View Post
I personally haven't noticed anything. I understand that it can be quite intimidating for a newbie to jump in, but that's really what you have to do. I was a little nervous when I first joined too, and it took me a while to join in, but I decided just go for it and did. And so many people make a point of going into the New Cats on the Block forum to welcome the newcomers, so they should just jump in. Everyone is welcome - please, no one should feel intimidated. We welcome all!
I agree that there are cliques here. And notice the two others who feel that too have been members for 2+ years, so it's kind of funny everyone is saying newbies.
post #19 of 24
maybe their is a conspiracy to freeze people out
post #20 of 24
Everywhere you go there's going to be cliques. While I wouldn't say there are people on TCS that purposely leave others out, there are quite a few people who are closer and talk off-site as well. You can't really blame them for having close friends on here.
As for feeling like an outsider, let me join the club (oxymoron, no?)! I'm most likely one of the youngest on the site, and I can't really jump into discussions about work and kids, etc. It's a little harder to get to know others better on here because I can't PM, reply in the IMO forum (I wish I could! ) or become a premier member yet.
If you feel left out, try jumping in to more conversations. Even adding a few words to a thread can help us to know you better and vice versa.
post #21 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by SwampWitch View Post
I haven't noticed that. But then again, I'm used to being the voice of dissent. I'm always pleasantly surprised when someone answers my threads.
That pretty much sums up my feeling too. Oh, I guess a few times, people have been a little condescending or inconsiderate. But those are rare occasions -- for the most part, I'm just amazed by the great kindness people have shown me here, members and moderators alike.

Love this place!
post #22 of 24
I'm a bit reluctant to start threads. No one wants to hear about pointless stuff from me (not that I can blame them ).
But I don't feel excluded exactly, there's too many active members for that to really happen.
I am starting to feel that way about another forum I'm on, and to be honest the place has degraded anyways. Too many new members, too many kids, and their arguing with senior members, mods, or even an admin seems to have pushed some members away. I now stick to just one little section or else I'll have everything I say picked apart by 13 year olds (who very much act their age).
post #23 of 24
I'm not a newbie, and I see it. I see it happen with others too, so I don't take it personal. I also know that I've been a member for awhile and have only a little over 800 posts where as some people who have been here less that a year have thousands! I take that all into consideration. I can't log in at work and am busy with life in general, therefore people don't know me on here that well.

I grew up with cats and they have made a great impact on my life and always will. I can share that here with everyone here. I have gotten great advice on this site. I decided to get Chevy because of this site and everyone's stories about how their cats enjoy eachother's company! Trust me, Scott and I had many discussions and even went "cat searching" many times never finding a kitty that called out to us. We also were going to places that had a high adoption rate (cats there for a month or less before being adopted). Its great that they can do that and remain no-kill, but we wated a cat in need. This site helped me do that!
post #24 of 24
This has already been hashed out in the IMO thread that was linked to on page one for 22 pages, and it was closed because there wasn't anything new added for about the last 2 pages.

I'm sorry that some people feel there are cliques here. I don't - I think there are some groups of people who have been here for a long time, AND post a lot who have formed friendships. Yes, they answer each other's posts. But I'm here every day, and I don't see anyone doing the active exclusion, flaming, and nastiness that is inherent in "cliques". There are new people who join here every day and make friends here. And there are also people who have made friends here who suddenly disappear without so much as a "See ya later."

At this point, I don't think that this thread will do anything but give rise to the possibility of hurt feelings, rehashing the thread in IMO, and the possibility of negative feedback of the site which would be a violation of Rule #7. So this thread is now closed.
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