Struggling With This

[skylerlark]

I am still in deep grief from my Binx passing 25th August last year, and can't shake off the feeling the vets may have made a mistake. The second from last one infused him with Acetar instead of his usual Lactate which made him very sick. I'd known about the differences between the two as he'd been given Acetar once before and was clearly in pain. He was growling (never growled) all the way home. The next day I called in a local clinician who diagnosed a 'sore throat' being the reason he wasn't eating. It was difficult to get him to eat without syringing it in anyway but he was in obvious discomfort. On asking clinician what to do she told me to bring him into her clinic the next morning to give him some 'medicine for his throat'. As soon as the pill (small black) was in, she told me to take him home straight away and administer Lactate. On attempting to insert the needle he let out a very loud yowl, jumped from his table and promptly died at the entrance doors.

I'm posting his last numbers. Could anyone confirm it was the CKD which took him and not the meds please? I'm aware he'd been sick a long time but looked so healthy, albeit he wasn't his old self. Thankyou

 

[price053]

I am still in deep grief from my Binx passing 25th August last year, and can't shake off the feeling the vets may have made a mistake. The second from last one infused him with Acetar instead of his usual Lactate which made him very sick. I'd known about the differences between the two as he'd been given Acetar once before and was clearly in pain. He was growling (never growled) all the way home. The next day I called in a local clinician who diagnosed a 'sore throat' being the reason he wasn't eating. It was difficult to get him to eat without syringing it in anyway but he was in obvious discomfort. On asking clinician what to do she told me to bring him into her clinic the next morning to give him some 'medicine for his throat'. As soon as the pill (small black) was in, she told me to take him home straight away and administer Lactate. On attempting to insert the needle he let out a very loud yowl, jumped from his table and promptly died at the entrance doors.

I'm posting his last numbers. Could anyone confirm it was the CKD which took him and not the meds please? I'm aware he'd been sick a long time but looked so healthy, albeit he wasn't his old self. Thankyou

I am so sorry, I do not know anything about the problems he was having. I have never had to deal with a cat being sick from that.
I just truly wanted to reach out to you because my heart breaks for you and how and what you must be going through.
If I could give you a big hug and console you I would.. There are not any words one can say to take your hurt or your doubt yet I am confident that you will be able to get your answers from someone here that has dealt with this before.

I am here if you need me and just want to talk. Just message if you would like.
Bella's Mom

 

[Kwik]

I'm so sorry for your loss,my heart goes out to you

His numbers show late stage and I do not believe he was suffering adverse reaction to the acetar though I think LRS would be the better choice - in any event he was suffering and subq fluids would not sustain him any longer my friend,now he rests in peace- no more suffering

There's so many complications in the latter stages of CKD,at thst point no doubt he had poor intravascular retention ahd I know you are thinking anaphalactic shock but I would not think that

He might have yowled if the needle accidentally was inserted in the muscle or due to cutaneous tension -how often was he getting subs fluids,what amounts?

Don't beat yourself up and drive yourself insane,I say this because I do it to myself over the loss of my boy Cheech(ckd) who was by my side for 19yrs.....I feel I tortured him force feeding and could not put him through one more day - and agonize over his euthanasia. Suddenly passing would have been much better instead of his slow torment

Binxs little heart took him over the Rainbow Bridge,where he waits for you ( young and healthy once again)

My deepest condolences-RIP Binx

 

[backwoodsvet]

I'm very Sorry to hear of your grief, it's always sad to hear of stories like yours, hope and pray everything works out for you.......

 

[skylerlark]

I'm so sorry for your loss,my heart goes out to you

His numbers show late stage and I do not believe he was suffering adverse reaction to the acetar though I think LRS would be the better choice - in any event he was suffering and subq fluids would not sustain him any longer my friend,now he rests in peace- no more suffering

There's so many complications in the latter stages of CKD,at thst point no doubt he had poor intravascular retention ahd I know you are thinking anaphalactic shock but I would not think that

He might have yowled if the needle accidentally was inserted in the muscle or due to cutaneous tension -how often was he getting subs fluids,what amounts?

Don't beat yourself up and drive yourself insane,I say this because I do it to myself over the loss of my boy Cheech(ckd) who was by my side for 19yrs.....I feel I tortured him force feeding and could not put him through one more day - and agonize over his euthanasia. Suddenly passing would have been much better instead of his slow torment

Binxs little heart took him over the Rainbow Bridge,where he waits for you ( young and healthy once again)

My deepest condolences-RIP Binx

I had been administering Lactate for around three months. I know the Acetar caused him distress as it had been sold to me by the clinician, telling me 'it's the same'. No, no it's not. He reacted in the exact same way some while ago and I took it back and exchanged it for his normal Lactate.

I wasn't thinking of anaphalactic shock at all. The clinician had been reluctant to administer anything but I was desperate. In hindsight it would have been better to have just let the Acetar wear off. But that would have prolonged his suffering.

It certainly wasn't the needle causing him to loudly yowl as I'd not had the time to fully insert it beforehand. I have heard of other cats, and dogs (there's a video on Youtube with a dog in his pet parent's arms) do exactly the same thing immediately before they passed.

This is where many people doubt my conviction it was his soul leaving his body. I'd had numerous phenomena after his immediate passing to this effect for several days after (which I detailed in the 'have you had signs' sub forum).

The Rainbow Bridge is merely a concept, I'm more prone to E=MC2, energy cannot be destroyed it just changes form. But the reason for my current bout of grief is that I no longer feel him around me. Although I understand they 'move on' but are always with us just at a higher vibratory rate. We can't see them (some can). Think of the spinning propellers of a helicopter, not visible unless they slow down. So this is where many will disagree with my take on spirituality, but if you search for this term, Quora has a LOT, I am not alone in this view.

I simply thought to post here, again, as I believe the reluctantly given medication put an end to his suffering, strange twist, but I was so bonded with him I think he knew I couldn't bear the thought of euthanising him, although I was tempted to ask the clinician who had to euthanise one of my dogs as an ultrasound showed he had no kidneys left and had bouts of crying, I'd sleep with him on the floor until I'd decided it was too cruel to keep him in this state. It was a beautiful peaceful experience, unlike Binx. However, it appears I've been forgiven or I would not have had so many types of visitation.

I'm in Thailand and there are a lot of very stupid 'vets' here as another member Richard Gee will attest to and I'd wondered if anyone felt it was the meds saw him off.

Anyway, thanks for everyone taking the time to respond. I couldn't bear to see him at his end stage CKD, his quality of very active and wonderful life is somewhere else now. Thanks again.

 

[EnelradSedir70]

I'm so sorry for the loss of Binx. I have a 19yo CKD kitty, Newt. I know what lactate is, but what was the goal of the administration? It's not something that has been recommended to me for him. I'm still giving him LRS sub-q twice weekly and kidney gold and kidney glandular. He has terrible arthritis in hips, and tried Solensia on him back in the spring. I think it made him lost his appetite and he lost a pound. He can't really afford to be losing weight at this point. So, I started him on some mushroom based joint supplement, which seems to help some. I'm concerned about his heart now, and of course dental disease because he isn't a candidate for anesthesia. Going to start him on Coq10/ubinqinol and see if that helps some with heart and gums.

Looking at his Creatinine, it was clearly very high. Again, I'm so sorry you and Binx went through this and all the sadness, confusion and guilt, that can accompany their loss.

Best,

Darlene and Gigi

 

[di and bob]

I'm so sorry for what your are going through, doubt and guilt are a real part of grieving, always present. I agree that the 'essence' that was your boy never goes away, it does change form. But I believe in the Rainbow bridge too, the energy that is him can be anywhere, and everywhere. The energy that is you may very well meet up with his again some day, some where........
Even though you do not 'feel' him near you, he is. Love is something that cannot be held in the hand, it is spiritual, so eternal. Like the wind, you do not see it until it acts on something else in a physical way, like a branch or leaves. The new path he is on will parallel your own until your end. He is tied to your very soul by the bonds of love. He gave you his love as a gift, as his legacy. Not to be grieved over for eternity, but to be grateful for, to be shared and used. He would never want you to be so sad, go forward and live as you would want for him to do if you were the first to go, he wants the same for you, the one who gave him all he ever wanted, a home, care and love.
The two solutions are used as IV's, as hydration, I truly don't think they had relly anything to do with his death, Unless he was overhydrated or the one burned as it went in. I would like to know what the black pill was, you may have to ask, it is your right. Do you have a bill with it written on it? He was in the last stages of CKD, and nothing is going to change what happened. He was most likely NOT going to get better, in fact his suffering would have increased. From your discription of his end, it sounds like his poor heart had given out.
My heart goes out to you, it takes a LONG time to learn to manage your grief and calm your doubts. In my own experience it takes at least two years before you even begin to feel better again, of course it can vary, with my little soulmate it took even much longer. But dwelling on their end brings nothing but heartache. I never thought I never would but I did love again, I did find happiness and the beauty of living.
Grief can bring you to your knees, take all pleasure out of yoru world. but it can be made easier to manage by keeping busy and letting another little one into your heart. To share that sweet boy's legacy he left you. But right now you need to take one day at a time, live in the present like Binx did and all cats do. The past is set in stone and cannot be changed, no matter how much we want it. We are here to try to bring comfort by letting you know we survived. We can empathize with your pain, because we have been there. Time heals all wounds, but for some it takes a lot of it. I will keep you in my thoughts, I will grieve with you. Take care of yourself.......