Reuniting Mom and kittens after 4 week separation - bad idea?

[moxiewild]

Wasn’t quite sure if this was more appropriate here or in Ferals and Strays, so I apologize.

Nearly 4 weeks ago I trapped 3 feral kittens who were about 7 weeks old at the time. I was unsuccessful in trapping the fourth despite many, many attempts and now the fourth kitten has been completely MIA for almost two weeks.

I had not trapped Mom yet to have her spayed because of that kitten and not wanting to risk it being left alone. However, I desperately need to get her spayed so she doesn’t have another litter obviously.

I set out a game camera last week to see if maybe kitten was still coming around when no one was there to see, but it doesn’t look like he/she has

So, I’m going to start trapping Mom tomorrow.

Thing is, I have no available space in this house... at all. We have been overloaded this year with fosters and feral rescues and kittens. There are currently two dogs and 13 cats under our roof. Every spare room is taken by a foster or two.

The kittens were quickly outgrowing their crate, so we enclosed the very last area we had by stacking a tonnn of petgates a few days ago. We moved two of our healthy fosters in there, and gave the kittens their old room.

When we spay Momma, I’m wondering if it would be okay to put her in the room with the kittens she will not have seen for four weeks? Or will this be the equivalent of throwing a completely strange, grown cat in with them? At their age (~10 weeks) and with how long the separation has been, I feel like it’s unlikely Mom or kittens will actually remember one another. I don’t want Mom or the kittens to be scared, or worse.

Their new digs -

 

[Furballsmom]

Hi!
Given your situation, I would try putting her in with them. Try and have some cardboard and a plan B ready in case things do go sideways, but still I think it's worth a shot.

Sending you TONS of love!!!

 

[moxiewild]

Hi!
Given your situation, I would try putting her in with them. Try and have some cardboard and a plan B ready in case things do go sideways, but still I think it's worth a shot.

Sending you TONS of love!!!

I was thinking it’d be best to set up the crate they were in and placing Momma cat in that, and have the crate in the room. That way, at the very least I could gauge if anyone was having an extreme or obvious reaction.

I just don’t really know how to go about “reintroducing” them in a situation like this...

Also, I was/am still debating whether I should try to hold onto her longer after she recovers to see if she can be better socialized.

She’s only semi-feral, and the sweet neighbor who has been caring for her has been extremely cooperative about all of this and would like Momma cat back. I thought it would be nice if I could make Momma more “pet-like” for her (this would also help ease my mind about this woman being able to get her to the vet if something happens).

That was the original plan, but with this missing kitten... I just worry the kitten is still out there or will show up and need Mom, especially with winter here.

I just got word we’ll be hitting freezing temperatures with rain next week, so that really makes me want to hold onto her a little longer.

I just don’t know. Sorry for the back and forth there, I’ve been internally debating this endlessly for a while now and am struggling with so much guilt over the missing kitten. It makes it difficult to make a decision or think objectively.

 

[Furballsmom]

That way, at the very least I could gauge if anyone was having an extreme or obvious reaction.

This is a grand idea and then see how things go, it might not be that bad. As far as that other kitten can you keep up the camera? In the meantime, keep working with Mama

 

[moxiewild]

This is a grand idea and then see how things go, it might not be that bad. As far as that other kitten can you keep up the camera? In the meantime, keep working with Mama

I probably could. The woman taking care of Momma is over an hour away from me, unfortunately, so I’m not sure how I would go about continuing to check it.

I told the woman that there’s a small possibility the kitten could show up in a week, month, or months from now, and if that ever happened, to let me know and I’ll come TNR at he very least.

 

[Jcatbird]

I’ve often reunited kitties after long periods. Every cat is different and starting in a crate is always a good idea. Especially until Mom is over being sore from surgery. They’ll probably be fine though. During weaning Mom May swat or hiss a bit but I found that even older cats did recognize each other after the initial reintroduction was over with and continued a loving relationship. Two of my rescues in particular that were bonded as kittens, socialized, adopted into another state, separated, lost and then I recovered both over a couple of weeks. It was traumatic for us all but after a bit of fear, they are completely bonded and inseparable. They were also reunited with their feral ( then socialized) mom and she adores them. I have socialized even tough old feral toms and my BJ is a complete lap cat now. Not all behave the same but I think your ideas are great as well as possibly lifesaving for mom. If she could be socialized fully, then maybe she’ll become a lap cat too.
I also found that putting a shelter out for missing kittens usually made them appear. It’s very likely the kitten is hanging out in the same place. Happens all the time. Please don’t feel bad. It’s always worrisome when we don’t get them all at once but kitties are tough and resourceful. If food is put out and shelter made available, I’m betting you’ll get the last kitten.
Bravo for all you have already done!

 

[StefanZ]

Yes, a crate here or there may be a good idea. It creates more space for you, so to speak.
Its probably possible and doable to reunite them in the same room. She may even adopt them back.
But fostering wise, its better to not bother. Let them be human-fostered all out. Or let them be with some other adult but human friendly cat or cats.
You dont want them to rewert to a shy behavior, because of a shy momma, whom you dont have had time to foster.

(If you had them all together from beginning it would be different, but that is another story).

moxiewild

 

[Sarthur2]

Mom will definitely need to be left alone for 2-3 days following her spay. I always recommend 3 days of pain meds. Once she feels better she will probably tolerate the kittens fairly quickly.

The chances that the other kitten is still out there are slim. I think keeping mom awhile to socialize her is a great idea. Will the sweet lady let her be an indoor cat once she is returned?

Thank you for all that you do!

 

[moxiewild]

Unfortunately, the only options I had for Momma cat were outdoor only options.

One person was interested in her for a sort of barn cat situation, but when I told her what would be involved in proper relocation, she went radio silent.

The woman feeding her never claimed her and referred to her as a stray, but we kept getting the distinct impression she actually wanted to keep her, so we talked to her about it.

Unfortunately, this will be an outdoor situation, as well. The woman would be open to bringing her inside, but her husband (who comes from a different culture) will not agree to that. Luckily, the husband is very adamant about wanting and keeping the cat now, so he definitely cares about her. I think it’s mostly a cultural thing, as well as her not being a typical pet cat.

Which is a big reason that I would like to attempt to socialize her! I’m holding onto hope that if I can make her more “pet-like” that he might come around to bringing her indoors. It’s also for my own peace of mind regardless though - I would feel much better knowing they could handle her and get her in a carrier to get her to the vet if/when needed.

This week I purchased an Ecoflex shelter to give them, and modified it. I added hinges, weather stripping, and a latch to the roof for easy cleaning/access, caulked the joints, added a couple coats of weatherproof sealant, and added foam insulation and Reflectix. I’ll provide her straw and enough extra for one change of straw just in case. And I’ll also be giving her one of our Snuggle Safes. So kitty will have a proper shelter for at least a few years.

I’ll have Momma microchipped in my name, as well. And since this woman knows nothing about cats, I’ll provide her some basic information, and modify that depending on Mom’s sociability come time for release.

I’ve let her know that if she ever has any issues, or can no longer take care of her, that she can call me, whether it’s one month from now or ten years from now. I will take Momma if it is ever needed.

I don’t think it will be, though. I don’t support feeding to breed, but in this case it was definitely an honest situation where she simply didn’t know where to turn. She had never heard of feral cats or trapping cats. She’s wanted Momma spayed for a while but had no idea how to go about it and just hoped to gain enough trust over time to be able to take her to the vet.

She has been extremely supportive and cooperative through all of this, even to the extent of letting me basically litter her property with traps and continually telling me I have full access to her backyard anytime I want. I don’t often get to work with people this cooperative so it’s been a very pleasant experience!

I think it would be really nice if I could help make her relationship with the cat more of a two sided/mutual companionship type of relationship than what it currently is

But Stefan does bring up a good point about the potential for the kittens to revert, so that’s something I’ll have to keep in mind and monitor closely.

 

[Furballsmom]

We're keeping our fingers crossed for you