- Joined
- Sep 18, 2022
- Messages
- 5
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- 6
I bought Pluto around two months ago and although it was short lived I had some of my best memories with him. I cannot articulate how much pain I am experiencing from the loss of my 5 month old boy. He was always playful and always wanted love and definitely had a appetite for days. Three days ago we let him go outside (as he always does- he’s accustomed to going outside to do his business and play around) expecting him to come back to his home like he always does before bed time. A month ago when we first bought him we let him stay indoors and we slowly let him explore the outside world until he was fully ready and up and going for a month. Anyways so three days ago he never arrived inside. Confused and worried at this unusual behaviour we decided to ring his bell you which he always without a fail responds to. Despite calling out his name many times around the block there was still no sign. The next morning at 6am we did a whole search hunt outside and there still was no sign of him. We did this many times throughout the day. At this point I was very worried and wondered if we’d ever find him. Me and my sister decided to do another night search at 9pm till 10pm and we went across main roads, through every alley way and through every street to see if we’d catch a glimpse of our special boy. We had put posters around our streets, reported out missing cat online and used social media to our advantage. Still no sign. At 4am my sister woke up and miraculously found him outside our porch. He was sat with his head tilted down with little to no response. We brought him inside and offered him his favourite tuna but he wouldn’t even sniff it. He just drank a whole load of water. It was clear that he was traumatised from something. My and my sister took him upstairs and put him in the warmth but he still didn’t move. He did just drink lots of water continuously although very lazily. He slept till the morning . In the morning we took him to the vet. They were very concerned about him as he has little response. They gave him antibiotics and an injection to help relieve suspected abdominal pain. They said he was breathing heavily. At that point they said it may be best to take him to the emergency vets. But this was looking to be over 1000 quid for the weekend. Although this price was shocking to me, I looked at my sister in means of this is what we have to get done. I acknowledged that it was expensive (and as a 19 year old who’s trying to save up) but that i would definitely be down to help pay for this. After talking to me dad she came to a consensus that we should take him home and give the right tlc and try feeding him through the syringes that the vet staff provided us with that day. We said that if he did not get any better by the next morning that we would bring him to the emergency vet. They said okay and so we did that. The following evening we tried feeding him and he only took the tiniest amount it but drivbled out the rest. I sort of counted on my sisters and dads word that perhaps we would feel better after the 24 hour injections (that he recieved from the vet that day). Looking back I cry at how I didn’t fight hard enough to get him into the emergency vet. We all downplayed the severity of his seeming accident and I didn’t persist to take him to the emergency vet to get the IV drip. I trusted to see how he would be under our presence and love alongside the little treatment he got that day. Although I told her I was scared for his life and willing to chip in money, I feel I should have been more pushing towards it. I’m not blaming my sister or dad for his following death afterwards as I know they didn’t mean to downplay it. Anyways, the next morning he didn’t seem to get any better and this time we was not taking in any food at all. He also wasn’t getting up to have any water. At this point we said we should take him to the emergency vet to get him checked out. We called out his name and petted him gently but he was very minimal with his movements. My sister layed his head down on his side and he was still breathing. When we moved him in his basket, that’s when the heart breaking truth was being revealed. His breathing seemed to stop. We rushed to the vet and throughout the whole journey his eyes were open- without a blink. Tears rolling down our cheeks we cried and cried until we got there. The vet came to check his heart beat and she broke to us that it had stopped entirely. At that point we were broken and upset. I felt so heart struck that my special boy had gone. All the memories the love the cuddles seemed to seem so distant as I saw him lying dead on the table. I went home and cried profusely. I couldn’t stop picturing his innocent face all sad and depressed at the vet. She had helped with her words and discussed cremation but me and my brother decided to go and collect him to bury him gracefully in our back yard. We bought some roses and lay them deep with his corpse wrapped in a towel from the vet. At that point the pain felt worse than ever. And at this point (11 hours after his death) I cannot help but feel the guilt consume me. I feel he had a potential to have his life saved had we acted slightly sooner. Although the bill was hefty, in my eyes his life came first. The vet said that he most likely got into a road accident when we went missing Hence internal bleeding could have resulted to his death. I guess I want to know if this was the case, how high was the possibility that he would have survived? I know it’s hard to determine but I can’t help but think perhaps he could have been alive right now. As I write this I keep balling my eyes out. He was such a lovely cat and I loved him to bits. He deserved to live long. Despite the unknown trauma he went through when he went missing he still came back to his house where he belonged and passed away in our presence. Even on his last day before his final moments Pluto still purred ever so slightly as I petted him. I hope he knows how much we loved him. Although I took care of him constantly and fed him and played with his soul throughout I feel immense pain and sorrow for him. I don’t think I’ll be ever get over this. But I will always remember my dear Pluto. He left a mark in my heart and in all of us. He was even loved by our other 8 year old cat. I hope he knows that, I hope he does. Rest in peace my dear Pluto I hope you are no longer in pain my love.
