My Cat Does Not Want To Come Home? Update: He's Home!

[Leo0820]

Hello,

My husband and I are foster parents to kids and fur babies. We took in a nee kiddo and she let our almost 6 year old kitty out. He's never ever been outside and he disappeared the night of the 23. We spotted him on our camera last night, but as soon as my husband opened the door he took off. We've had a few people in thr neighborhood say they saw him. Why doesn't he want to come home? How can I get him to come home?
We put up flyers, contacted all local shelters and vets, notified the microchip company, went door to door, set up kitty traps with his regular food, set up his litter and bed outside. I don't know what more to do. He is our baby. We are so devastated and haven't slept in days. Do you think he no longer wants to be part of the family? We have neighborhood cats that roam the streets and we think he joined them. We really want to bring him back home, but if he was happy with us he would of came back right? Do you think it's best to just keep putting food and water out for him and let him be an outsoor cat? I really don't know what to do. Thank you!

 

[ssssupernova]

I'm sorry that happened to you

Maybe he came back that time wanting to come home, but your husband suddenly appearing at the door frightened him. Cats are naturally skittish and your poor boy is suddenly in a new, unfamiliar environment, having to compete for food with other cats/fauna. He'll be very disoriented, scared out of his mind and quick to run. It doesn't mean he hates you or doesn't want to come back.

I would install a cat flap with the flap removed (for now), and a bowl of his favourite treats just inside. That way if he comes back sniffing around the house, hopefully he'll find the cat flap hole, smell yummies inside, and come in on his own. I assume he's not used to operating a cat flap so it's important to remove the flap or hold it open somehow.

The last thing you want to do is chase a cat or startle him. If you see him on the cameras again, don't rush out the door to grab him, just open it slowly and softly encourage him to come inside, using whatever word or sound you make to call him for dinner or treats.

I hope you get him back! Don't lose hope - it's a great sign that you saw him last night, it means he's doing well and still in the area. He just needs to figure out that the way home is through your front door.

 

[Leo0820]

Thank you so much for your reply. We have a cat door inbour garage leading it to the living room and he uses it. It came with the house. I am afraid if I put up a cat flap at the front door we might wake up with bunch of animals at our house lol. For some reason we always attract animals and they want to come inside. For now, we are leaving the door open in hopes of him coming inside. No luck yet. If he doesn't come home tonight, tom night we will install the cat flap. He is such a scared cat and usually only comes to me, but when he's scared he just hides and refuses to come out .

I'm sorry that happened to you

Maybe he came back that time wanting to come home, but your husband suddenly appearing at the door frightened him. Cats are naturally skittish and your poor boy is suddenly in a new, unfamiliar environment, having to compete for food with other cats/fauna. He'll be very disoriented, scared out of his mind and quick to run. It doesn't mean he hates you or doesn't want to come back.

I would install a cat flap with the flap removed (for now), and a bowl of his favourite treats just inside. That way if he comes back sniffing around the house, hopefully he'll find the cat flap hole, smell yummies inside, and come in on his own. I assume he's not used to operating a cat flap so it's important to remove the flap or hold it open somehow.

The last thing you want to do is chase a cat or startle him. If you see him on the cameras again, don't rush out the door to grab him, just open it slowly and softly encourage him to come inside, using whatever word or sound you make to call him for dinner or treats.

I hope you get him back! Don't lose hope - it's a great sign that you saw him last night, it means he's doing well and still in the area. He just needs to figure out that the way home is through your front door.

 

[jen]

It isn't that he doesn't want to come home, he is terrified. Despite the fact that he knows his name and recognizes his voice, he is too scared. It is recommended to do all that has been previously mentioned but I would also suggest renting a have a heart trap and seeing if you can get him at night. Cover it with a blanket and put his favorite food inside, also a blanket or something that smells like you or the cat. Good luck!

 

[tinydestroyer]

I'm so sorry this happened! I can't imagine what a tough few nights you've had. He's so lucky to have you and your husband doing everything you can! Please don't give up hope!
From a distance, your cat may not even recognize it's you approaching them. Even cats who live in the same household can experience non-recognition aggression if they don't recognize the other cat's smell - like after a vet visit. I think ssssupernova is also correct in that the cat likely doesn't understand the way back home if the he stayed inside until now. Those were great suggestions: using calm voices and food to lure your kitty back to the right home. Continue checking the traps and shelters, and casting a wide net in terms of the methods used to find your furry friend. I can't imagine that your cat is at all unhappy at home with all the loving effort you're putting into finding him. You're doing great! Best of luck!

 

[5starcathotel]

I had this happen with one of mine maybe 6 months ago....silly cat went outside and was immediately terrified by everything!!! He ended up cowering under my deck.

Ultimately, I had to open the back door, and just call to him softly (meow) for a long time.... it was 5 minutes before I heard him meow quietly in response....10 before his meows got louder and more plaintive....and over 20 minutes before he finally ventured out from his hiding place to investigate the open door!!!

Once inside, he yelled at me like it was MY fault he was outside for about 36 hours.

So, door open should work.

 

[Leo0820]

Thank you everyone .Our kids and other fur kids are devastated too. We just want him home .Thank you for the cat flap idea. I found few good ones online . If he doesn't come home by tonight then we'll install it tomorrow night after work. I found one that will allow him to come inside, but he can't run out. I am dying to hug and kiss my baby boy .This is the worst feeling ever.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Sitting quietly outside at dusk with a can of warmed tuna (and a clothespin on your nose) may also draw him back. I will stress again that he isn't staying away because he didn't like you, he is afraid. Patience. You do, at least, know he is nearby. If he has his own litter box, you can set that outside as well. His own scent will draw him to it.

 

[Leo0820]

Hi everyone,

A little update. We spotted him yesterday twice .So the trap is not working. We caught the same cat twice! We left the door open and put food inside and he came in. We tied a string to the door handle and pulled it .By the time we pulled it he ran out. We're clueless. Tonight we're setting up the traps and putting more food inside and trying it again .Hopefully it works. We looked at adding a cat door to our door, but we can't cut this door. It's not made out of wood.

 

[maggiedemi]

Demi did this once. He escaped and wouldn't come home. He wasn't scared either. He was having fun playing in the woods with the neighbors' cat and pretended he didn't even know me! He would turn his head and look the other way. I was so mad and hurt. So after 2 days, I put out a plate of his favorite kibble and grabbed him while he was eating it.

 

[Leo0820]

Is anyone awake? We need help. We found Leo .He is hiding in our neighbors garage. There's a small opening where his cats come out from. He's refusing to move because theres a dog . Neighbors are total jerks ... It's a total different story .It's 3 am here and they are asleep. Not sure what to do .We've been sitting outside with food just calling his name .It's not working.

 

[maggiedemi]

Probably have to wait until the neighbors wake up and open the garage door...

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Any luck?

 

[Leo0820]

UPDATE. We caught Leo! He is safe at home with all his fur and non fur siblings. Our family feels whole again. Leo was hiding in our neighbors garage and we spotted him and our neighbor was kind enough to let us in there to search for him. We can finally get some sleep tonight... He's pretty traumatized, but he started opening up to us again and was rubbing on all of us, stretching and rolling... He's happy to be home.

 

[maggiedemi]

That's wonderful!

 

[Mamanyt1953]