I too was shocked by how much pain I felt when I lost my boy Tik on the 15th August, It felt like I couldn't breath at times it hurt so much. But my boy like winter knew how much I loved him and always will.In time i know it will get easier because I can remember the good times we had together and smile. I saw a picture yesterday of a cat that was the spit of my boy and bursts into tears we will have days that are worse but they will get less often please try to remember that. I'm so sorry for your loss R.I.P sweet winter.