Looking for support and words of advice

[Medical Herby]

My senior boy, Herby, recently had a UTI along with some other GI issues, but he seems to be on the mend. However, I can't stop hovering and tracking every change I notice (or think I notice) in his behavior. We went to the vet six times in the span of two weeks trying to get him sorted out, and now I note whether he's eating more or less than before he was sick, grooming more or less, playing more or less - did he always sleep this much? I'm a ball of anxiety, anticipating that something is going to go wrong again. And I know cats are extremely intelligent, and he's probably picking up on my own changes in attitude, but I can't help it. My own sleeping and eating is all out of whack in an attempt to monitor him throughout the day.

My senior boy is eating, using the litterbox regularly, he hasn't thrown up or been nauseous (which were the prevailing symptoms after a course of antibiotics) in over a week now, the vet said his lab work was remarkably boring for a cat his age, but I still can't seem to shake the pit in my stomach. Before Herby, I had a female cat who died horribly due to cancer. I regret not letting her go peacefully and submitting her to all sorts of vet visits and medications right up until she passed, and now that's in the front of my mind with Herby.

I'm fairly new to this forum, and it has been incredibly helpful with helping Herb after his UTI, so I'm hoping some of you will have words of advice that will help set me free from all these feelings. I don't have people in my life who will understand as closely as some of you if I bring this to them.

Thanks in advance, everyone.

 

[Furballsmom]

Hi
What with the good and normal way he's behaving, I think you can, and should, heave yourself out the door by whatever means necessary.

Get a coffee in the morning, go out somewhere for lunch even if it's just up the street, go for a walk, and gradually extend the time so you're away from him for an hour, then maybe two.

You will both benefit, I promise, and your mind and heart will be clearer

 

[IndyJones]

One thing that helps me is keeping a mental diary of what Kabuto's days look like. I also have a thread on here I kind of use as a diary too.

Maybe keeping a diary of Herbys days would help wheather physicaly or a mental one.

Love the name btw. Herby is a good movie.

 

[neely]

I think we can all relate in part to what you feel. It's only natural to worry about our cats when something has affected their health. Then we are on high alert waiting for something to happen again. But we have to tell ourselves to think positive and hope for the best. Remember, when you're more relaxed your cat is too.

 

[fionasmom]

I am sorry for your loss of your other cat; however, it does not sound like Herbie is anywhere close to being that critical, not to mention that he does not have cancer.

Keeping some kind of record in some form can be a big help. I have done it for any pet, dog or cat, who had an ongoing condition. It may help to stop you from second guessing yourself.

 

[JamesCalifornia]

~ Try to keep things in perspective. Obsessing is never good .

 

[labstuff444]

I feel for you. It's so HARD to not get overly emotional. I'm so guilty. We love them so much and it's hard to not obsess.

BUT you have to, for your sake and his breathe a little. You've had him to the vet 6 times. If something crazy was going on, they would absolutely point it out. You're doing everything possible for him.
Losing your last cat like that is so hard too. I fully relate and understand why it's hard to relax.
But, if you're also concerned about his quality of life, I'd 100% just ask your vet their opinion. I feel like they tend to be honest if you ask for their input.

 

[Medical Herby]

Thank you all for the kind words. Herby has been consistently getting better over the past week, even initiating some playtime! I went out for a coffee and then lunch the next day, and even caught a movie (in a theater!) the following day. Herb welcomed me at the door each time; I'd forgotten he did that.

I know our companions are with us for a period of time, and I keep trying to remember that my job is not to make sure he lives forever but rather that he lives a good life while he's with me.

Thank you all again for easing me out of my head; I really needed it.

 

[Furballsmom]

You are absolutely fantastic !

 

[neely]

I know our companions are with us for a period of time, and I keep trying to remember that my job is not to make sure he lives forever but rather that he lives a good life while he's with me.

Truer words were never spoken, I completely agree.