I Regret My Choice.

[Snake5500]

I genuinely believe that assuming overt deference to a vet simply because of the authority their position implies psychologically is a simplistic interpretation of this situation. While this vet sounds incredibly callous and unfeeling, I fail to see how putting a cat to sleep helps them in any way, as no future services could be rendered for money. Had she taken the cat home, she may still have decided to go through with the painful or risky surgery later, thereby giving the vet the expensive surgery fee. However, this still wouldn't have 100% ensured a different outcome.
I think some of the difficulty lies in the OP not knowing if she believes that it was the right course of action for her and her kitten in retrospect, but there's very little doubt she believed it was the right thing to do at the time. It pained her to do it, and she did it anyway, with the intention of sparing her cat pain. While blind deference to any authority, including a vet, can be very detrimental, so can unfocused skepticism. Barring the OP gaining the ability to read the charts / x rays or get a second veterinary opinion on Ezio's case post mortem, there is no way you can say with certainty that the wrong choice was made.
There's something to be said for using tragedy as a learning experience.
I'm sure that in the future, remembering to have pet insurance, savings, or care credit options for fur babies is a helpful lesson, as is not allowing yourself to be rushed into such a dire decision. But you must also learn not to punish ourselves for that which truly lies outside of our control and our blame. S Snake5500 I'm so sorry you're feeling such regret and grief, and hope that you and your other 4 little ones can begin to heal soon.

Yeah it was dealing with the what ifs, I dont blame the vet although do think the vet could of alowed me to pay the rest on pay day. The blame i have is for my self, as in i should of had insurance, savings something to cover my babys for things like this. I also blame my self for not thinking straight at the time and giving the go ahead

I know that the opp could of been a wast of time now, there may been damage inside as still dont know what it was that got stuck or was blocking his bowls. I aslo know that when a cat is showing signs of sickness it means there is something really bad as they will try to hide it. so i know he was in bad shape

I just wish at the least i could of got xrays, but still that may have lead to him having to suffer for a few days to have the same out come. I just know i learnt alot from this and its something i wouldnt wish on no one.

 

[Snake5500]

I hope you are doing better.

Yeah im doing better thank you, it still hurts alot but able to stop thinking about what if. Thank you all for the help your kind words really have helped alot.

 

[terestrife]

you made the best choice that you could in that situation. my family signed for my mother to not be revived after taking her to the hospital for the third time. hardest thing we ever had to do, but we wanted to end her suffering. i know how hard it is to hold someone elses life in your hands.

just in case something like this comes up again. please find another vet. when i had no money, my vet immediately mentioned care credit. i dont have a job, and only make money doing odd jobs for pocket money. but i was still accepted. care credit, is a credit card that you use to cover a vet visit. i just used mine to pay $800 for a dental, and $300 for a yearly checkup and bloodwork. I will now spend the next year paying it off. i do want to look into insurance once i am financially stable. but its good to have a card at the ready when everything else fails.

my heart is with you. it is so important to have a vet that cares about your fur-baby.