I Left My Feral's Behind When I Moved Feeling So Guilty

[Rie]

Hi I have been taking care of feral cats for about 15 years many generations have passed through my yard. I started taking care of them due to several neighbors who have used rat poison to kill them, it's not easy seeing them die that way. I have brought a couple of in through the years and some socialized some didn't. Anyway last Oct we sold our house and moved to Staten Island I had 3 ferals that we really took care of, we had them TNR'd but I wanted to take them but I have 6 cats of my own and 9 would have been too much in the smaller house we went to and didn't want to leave them outside in the new house even though I did have a house for them as I didn't know how new neighbors would feel. It killed me to leave them especially my Tiny girl she is my heart took care of her and her mom from kittens she is a bit more social thanks to my picking up. Anyway my old neighbor next door said she would take care of them if gave her all my stuff I had for them and I did, I have gone back a couple of times the first time she didn't even come when I called her the 2nd time I had food and she came running but looked at me with hate to me anyway. I wanted to take her then with me but she gave me such a hard time to put her in the carrier, now when I do go to the neighborhood I do want to go get her but not sure if I would be doing more harm to her taking her inside a house that she's not used to and being away from the others. What should I do?

Rie

 

[Furballsmom]

Hi, thanks for coming here!
You could check whether it's illegal in your state to put out rat poison (I'm guessing about that, but it's worth a check).
If you can trap/catch her with Kentucky Fried chicken or mackerel or both, I'd say go ahead and try to get her out of that neighborhood. She doesn't hate you, cats don't think like that. She is probably a bit confused and unclear as to what the new normal is.
You won't be doing more harm.

 

[trudy1]

Wow, been there, done that. It’s amazing the guilt you feel over leaving them, even if you have tacit promise from neighbor to care for them. To them it’s still not you, the way you move, the time you fed, etc. Don’t feel surprised she “rejected” you. I’ve gone through this with a colony and you must know their little world is turned upside down. Like you I fed but only for 8 years.
My questions would be: how was tiny girl with you before you left and do you have the time/patience to work with her to restore that trust? If yes then go for it. Also how long since you’d seen her and how did she look? What about the other two? Just wondering if the neighbor was doing right ....

Sorry you had to go through this. Wish I could say it got easier with time but I can’t. You can take comfort in all those lives you saved and the love you gave...15 years...wow...you deserve an award...but of course we get that in head butts and purrs, right?

Please let us know how it goes

 

[Rie]

Wow, been there, done that. It’s amazing the guilt you feel over leaving them, even if you have tacit promise from neighbor to care for them. To them it’s still not you, the way you move, the time you fed, etc. Don’t feel surprised she “rejected” you. I’ve gone through this with a colony and you must know their little world is turned upside down. Like you I fed but only for 8 years.
My questions would be: how was tiny girl with you before you left and do you have the time/patience to work with her to restore that trust? If yes then go for it. Also how long since you’d seen her and how did she look? What about the other two? Just wondering if the neighbor was doing right ....

Sorry you had to go through this. Wish I could say it got easier with time but I can’t. You can take comfort in all those lives you saved and the love you gave...15 years...wow...you deserve an award...but of course we get that in head butts and purrs, right?

Please let us know how it goes

Thanks everyone I think I’m going to give it a try. She did look healthy much fatter from when I left her. I have not seen her in 3 months but I do have other former neighbors that try and keep an eye on them for me but there is such a void and a guilt feeling. Even though I do have my own I do want to know she is safe. The other 2 are Mom and don and are fine and not as friendly as my Tiny and will be ok. As far as doing this for 15 years I love all animals and can’t see anyone hurting or abusing them as far as the rat poison it is illegal in NY but you hVe to prove it and I couldn’t . Thanks for the replies

 

[Furballsmom]

thank goodness she looked good, that's something

 

[catsknowme]

I say go with your instincts. Since Don and Mom are doing well, they have obviously adjusted. And if you have that nagging feeling about Tiny, then you are right to trap her and move her to where you can supervise her care. I would not let her out for a long time, if at all, if that is possible. Often, their wanting to go outside is only fear/insecurity at being in the new surroundings.