Heartbroken but need advice

[Awl20]

My sweet Mini died yesterday morning of a stroke. Totally unexpected and it was honestly a horrible experience. I never knew grief could be this way with pets. This was my first pets of my own so the bond was strong. She was wonderful. She helped me through so much, in particular staying by my side for weeks after a miscarriage day and night.
What I need help with is that Mini's sister Makita is (thankfully healthy) looking for her and is visibly confused although cuddly and friendly. I'm carrying her on my shoulder just rhe way she likes when she seems confused. I have no idea how to help her... please help

 

[FeebysOwner]

I am so sorry about Mini. RIP little girl.

Extra attention and loving, along with maintaining a normal routine as much as possible are probably about all you can do. This TCS article talks about mourning in cats, if it might help you any at all.
Do Cats Mourn? – TheCatSite Articles

 

[betsygee]

I'm so sorry about Mini. It's always hard to lose them and doubly so when it's unexpected like that. My heart goes out to you. I'd agree with FeebysOwner about extra love and attention for Makita. It will take some time for her to get used to her sibling being gone.

Rest in peace, little Mini.

 

[Tik cat's mum]

I'm so sorry for your loss, RIP sweet Mini I have to agree extra TLC for Makita. She just needs time to adjust like we do.

 

[Awl20]

Thank you too everyone watching her look around for her sister is ripping my heart up. I will do what everyone suggested

 

[epona]

Firstly, my condolences on your loss - that's a terrible shock when something sudden like that happens, it can be extra traumatic IME.

About your grieving kitty - I have been going through the same with my Jakey since his best buddy died at the beginning of January - I think you have to let them find their own way a bit, accept that (in all likelihood) even more about her world has changed than it has for you - not to diminish your grief - that is its own horrible misery that we endure because we love them so - but cat buddies where they are good friends, their entire world and all their routines which are so important for cats tend to be tied together. They can be the centre of one anothers worlds when they are close.

Your bereaved girl will in time find her own new routines, her behaviour and patterns to her day may change considerably as she adjusts - give her comfort when she wants comfort, space when she wants space, and understanding and patience through her grief. It could take a while for her to come to terms with the fact that her sister isn't coming back and settle into new routines, months quite probably.

I would say that if she stops eating at any point that is a medical emergency so take her straight to the vet. Also if she seems to be losing weight, or after a couple of months isn't starting to take an interest in the world around her, consult your vet. Otherwise, just give her time.

And again, I am most sorry for your loss.

 

[Margot Lane]

My cat seems extremely comforted by Music for Cats by David Teie…don’t know if it helps w/ a cat’s grief but it can’t hurt to try it!

 

[Maria Bayote]

I am very sorry for your loss. Sending hugs to you. Hang in there.

As for your other kitty Makita, animals can feel grief too. So the advices above are really great ones. Being there for each other is enough, and you can help each other heal.

But if you feel there is something really wrong, as adviced too by epona , a vet check should be done.

If you need anyone to talk to, we are here for you.

 

[di and bob]

My sincere condolences, I know how big a hole this leaves in your world. It also leaves a huge one in Makita's. Cats are very upset by changes in their routine, they live on routine and familiar surroundings. Your little girl is feeling lost and sad just like you, I pray you can comfort each other in your grief. She needs you just as much as you need her right now.
Your bond of love with Mini can never be taken from you. It is spiritual, so eternal. She will forever be as close as your thoughts and prayers so send her thanks for her being in your life and giving you so very much. She was meant to be in your life, to have never known her would have spared you this pain, but at what cost to your soul? She filled it with so much love and happiness.
I don't know why such horrible things have to happen in our lives, I don't think anyone could ever explain it. That is why it is so important to live and love each and every day as if it is our last, not one of us is guaranteed a tomorrow. Your sweet girl would want you to go forward into life and seek its happiness and joy, just as you would have wanted for her if you were the first to go. She is at peace because she carries your and her sister's love with her. And always will.
this will hurt for a long time, time is the only thing that helps to soften the sharp edges of grief. Do not let the horrible memories of her last day take over all those memories of happiness and love she left with you. Do not let death control what you two shared. It will if you let it. Keep busy, and take what comfort you can in her sister's presence. She can offer you unconditional love and some soothing comfort to your broken heart.
My thoughts and prayers are with you both, take care, we are here if you need us.......RIP beautiful Mini. You will never be forgotten, you will always have a seure place in loving hearts. May teh good Lord bless and keep you, until you meet again!

 

[Awl20]

My goodness you all are so incredibly kind I'm so thankful for the responses

 

[Meekie]

So sorry to hear about Mini. It's always so much worse when they go unexpectedly.

Since they're siblings, it may take a while for Makita to get over it. The above advice is good. Don't stray from your routines. And when she wants cuddles, give her plenty.

Maybe some Feliway might help ease her confusion?

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Rest you gentle, Mini, dream you deep. Your pawprints are on someone's heart forever.

I am so sorry. I know that Makita is feeling this deeply, as her world is much smaller than yours. You've gotten such good advice that I will only add, share your sorrow with Makita, as she shares hers with you. Truly, sorrow shared is sorrow halved. Allow the shared sorrow between you to heal you both.