Grieving cat, need ideas fast

[threecatowner]

I lost my Mom in November, after a long illness. She died at home, with my Dad being her primary caretaker.

My parents have two cats, and Dizzle, 9 year old spayed female, was closest to Mom. In the month since Mom died, Dizzle has gone from a playful, rather rotund, friendly cat to a lethargic, depressed cat who is starving herself and hiding under a bed 24/7. A couple of weeks ago I got her to the vet, who ran blood and urine, and found nothing physically wrong except dehydration, for which she was given fluids. The vet agrees that this cat is grieving, and prescribed transdermal prozac.

To get her out from the bed a few days ago, Dad jingled her harness, as she loves (in summer) to go out back on her long leash, and catch bugs or watch birds. This actually brought her out, so I felt like we needed to follow through, and I went out with her. We've had much rain and 50 degree temps here, but it was early evening, and dark and very damp out.

She continued to decline, so I took her back to the vet Monday for more fluids, and as I put her in the carrier, she sneezed a few times. She spent a night at the vet, where she received fluids, appetite stimulant and when I brought her home yesterday, she was eating like a pig. They did give her a shot of Convenia, as she had also come in with a low grade fever, and combined with her new sneezing symptom, they were concerned.

Today I went over to give her the daily appetite stimulant, and she was hiding under the bed, with a full-blown URI. Her breathing was horribly congested, eyes matted - and naturally, she would not eat. I got her out from under the bed, and she was wrapping around my legs, looking at the food I fixed for her, but she didn't/couldn't eat.

We are now back to square one, and I'm terrified. I know damp cool weather won't cause a URI, but I now feel guilt from allowing a cat who didn't have a lot of fight in her into the back yard - she had zero signs of a cold until now, and it was 2 weeks from her first vet visit. I don't know how else she could've gotten this. The other cat, neutered 8 year old male, who was incredibly bonded with her, continually hisses at her.

My question is: has anyone dealt with an apparently grieving cat who refused food? Did anything work to get them back to wanting to live? A couple decades back I lost one to fatty liver syndrome, and a non-eating cat scares me to death.

I never in a million years would have seen this coming, and Mom would be heartbroken if she knew.

Please send vibes, advice, tips or tricks... and thank you!

 

[tabbytom]

Please send vibes, advice, tips or tricks... and thank you!

Deepest condolences and sympathies on the bereavement of you mom

Maybe this article will help?

do-cats-mourn

 

[threecatowner]

Deepest condolences and sympathies on the bereavement of you mom

Maybe this article will help?

do-cats-mourn

Thank you. I read the article, and it gave me a somewhat positive feeling that this cat can overcome this.

 

[tyleete]

What was the stimulant? My Vet told me Mirtazapine was the only thing and should only be given every 72hrs.
And I have 2 cats that have bad reactions on it. So am curious.
Animals can definitely grieve. Something you wouldn't think of, but even tiny animals can. We had a pair of gerbils dumped on us and when the one died, her sister followed shortly from being heart broken. For 3 days she walked around her fancy digs searching for her and crying out for her while searching everywhere. It was depressing to watch. So I'm sure if gerbils can feel so strongly, so to can cats.
Your main goal is to keep her hydrated (learning how to give subq fluids will cut down on vet trips, stress from taking her + costs), getting her to eat, and over this URI. I had a 17yr old that kept getting them, and sometimes it was really hard to pull her through. She didn't want to eat no matter how smelly the food was, because she breathed through her mouth while congested. Which means She couldn't breathe while eating.
I had to go through these foods:
Hartz bisque, Beechnut Stage 1 baby food (turkey, beef, or chicken), and anything in between. Those first 2 are all she would eat at the worst part in her congestion. I'd heat them up to help.
And she was on the baby food & bisque for two weeks once! But it got her through. Once she's over the infection, can work on the rest. But they can't go long without water or food.
On the depression, many vets weren't open to it but mine was. Look into cbd oil. One of mine took it until her passing. She was so much happier on it. I have it to stop her from throwing up daily (Cancer), and hadn't realized she was suffering from anxiety as well. She was almost like a changed cat! Used to stayin the laundry room to be away from the others. After it kicked in, she was out in the living room every day with us. I've heard it helps everything from pain, inflammation, anxiety, boost in appetite, & depression. But! I don't know about mixing it with Prozac. So I'd definitely consult a very first. My kitty used salmon oil flavored cbd by Lazarus Naturals.
I wish youthe best and sorry for your loss.

 

[di and bob]

Try the lickable treats, sometimes it is the ONLY thing my cats will eat when they are sick. Even a few licks are good. my cats always eat Delectable Lickables in the stew flavors, not the bisque. You might also try a hamburger patty from McDonald's, Arby's roast beef, and deli chicken. whatever it takes. I also give Nose Relief drops from amazon, they seem to help.

 

[game misconduct]

sorry for your loss

 

[tyleete]

I also give Nose Relief drops from amazon, they seem to help.

Oh yeah! I had to do that the last two times! My cat absolutely hated them! But it helped loosen stuff. I also VERY carefully used one of the nose aspirators when it got really bad. But you have to be so careful with those, as you can do damage to the membranes.
I used Little Remedies pediatric nose drops from Wal-Mart. It made quite a difference

 

[di and bob]

I put the drops in the Delectable Lickables, they lapped it right up!

 

[threecatowner]

What was the stimulant? My Vet told me Mirtazapine was the only thing and should only be given every 72hrs.
And I have 2 cats that have bad reactions on it. So am curious.
Animals can definitely grieve. Something you wouldn't think of, but even tiny animals can. We had a pair of gerbils dumped on us and when the one died, her sister followed shortly from being heart broken. For 3 days she walked around her fancy digs searching for her and crying out for her while searching everywhere. It was depressing to watch. So I'm sure if gerbils can feel so strongly, so to can cats.
Your main goal is to keep her hydrated (learning how to give subq fluids will cut down on vet trips, stress from taking her + costs), getting her to eat, and over this URI. I had a 17yr old that kept getting them, and sometimes it was really hard to pull her through. She didn't want to eat no matter how smelly the food was, because she breathed through her mouth while congested. Which means She couldn't breathe while eating.
I had to go through these foods:
Hartz bisque, Beechnut Stage 1 baby food (turkey, beef, or chicken), and anything in between. Those first 2 are all she would eat at the worst part in her congestion. I'd heat them up to help.
And she was on the baby food & bisque for two weeks once! But it got her through. Once she's over the infection, can work on the rest. But they can't go long without water or food.
On the depression, many vets weren't open to it but mine was. Look into cbd oil. One of mine took it until her passing. She was so much happier on it. I have it to stop her from throwing up daily (Cancer), and hadn't realized she was suffering from anxiety as well. She was almost like a changed cat! Used to stayin the laundry room to be away from the others. After it kicked in, she was out in the living room every day with us. I've heard it helps everything from pain, inflammation, anxiety, boost in appetite, & depression. But! I don't know about mixing it with Prozac. So I'd definitely consult a very first. My kitty used salmon oil flavored cbd by Lazarus Naturals.
I wish youthe best and sorry for your loss.

Yes, that is the med, and it is working (or something is)! Yesterday she was still a bit congested, but nothing like the day before, and was eating well, I'm guessing because she could smell better. Vet discontinued Prozac.

We have a long way to go to get her weight back to normal, but she was lying on top of the bed, rather than hiding under it, thankfully.

I have seen no bad side effects from the med, so far. Hopefully she won't be on it for long.

 

[nollamadrama]

First and foremost I am so very sorry for the loss of your mother.

I think it sounds like you're doing the best you can. Please don't beat yourself up for letting the cat into the yard. You don't know for certain that that's where the URI came from and from your post it seems like you handled her outing very responsibly and that it was done with the best of intentions.

I would suggest that (if you haven't already done so) you try offering her all different kinds of food. Maybe there's something that she won't be able to resist? I think if things are getting particularly bad it might not matter if it's the healthiest food or not. You can always wean her back onto the good stuff once she improves.

A friend of mine adopted a cat years ago who was refusing to eat. He called the rescue to ask what he should do and they told him to offer "fruity pebbles" aka kitty junk food.

He went to the store and bought a few varieties of inexpensive wet food.

It worked. The cat couldn't resist and after he had settled in my friend weaned him onto a better quality food.

 

[threecatowner]

First and foremost I am so very sorry for the loss of your mother.

I think it sounds like you're doing the best you can. Please don't beat yourself up for letting the cat into the yard. You don't know for certain that that's where the URI came from and from your post it seems like you handled her outing very responsibly and that it was done with the best of intentions.

I would suggest that (if you haven't already done so) you try offering her all different kinds of food. Maybe there's something that she won't be able to resist? I think if things are getting particularly bad it might not matter if it's the healthiest food or not. You can always wean her back onto the good stuff once she improves.

A friend of mine adopted a cat years ago who was refusing to eat. He called the rescue to ask what he should do and they told him to offer "fruity pebbles" aka kitty junk food.

He went to the store and bought a few varieties of inexpensive wet food.

It worked. The cat couldn't resist and after he had settled in my friend weaned him onto a better quality food.

Thank you! Yesterday, her congestion was better - though not entirely gone - but she must've been well enough to smell, because she ate a good bit of wet food. She ate again today. She is still stopped up, but much more on the mend. Poor thing, I'm sure this is the first URI she's ever had.

She is also sleeping and lounging around most of the time - but she's not hiding under beds, she is sleeping on top of the bed, which is a huge positive change.

Thank you for your kind response..

 

[stephanietx]

Place articles of your mom's clothing that might still have her scent on them around for the kitty to lay on. It sounds like the stress of losing her beloved owner has caused an upper respiratory infection. You can try offering plain meat baby food, no onions or garlic, to see if that entices her to eat. Also, try warming up wet food to get her to eat.