Dick, The Most Wonderful Cat in the World

[cuvmoi]

I lost my best friend last night. He gave me more love, comfort and joy that most of the people who have come and gone in my life. I have no words to describe the way I feel right now. He was so, so much more than "just a cat". I will have his ashes later this week in an urn, and when it's my time to join him, his ashes will go into the earth with me. I'm just so empty right now. Just going through the motions. I have no zest for life whatsoever at the moment. He was my baby. This pain is excruciating.

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• cuvmoi
• Oct 5, 2015

 

[cuvmoi]

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• cuvmoi
• Oct 5, 2015

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• cuvmoi
• Oct 5, 2015

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• cuvmoi
• Oct 5, 2015

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• cuvmoi
• Oct 5, 2015

 

[margd]

I am so sorry about your friend. Dick sounds like he was really a very special cat. It is so terrible - they are never with us long enough. My heart goes out to you in your loss, your grief is so strong. I hope with time you can get some comfort from happy memories, though they be bittersweet for now.

RIP Dear Dick. [emoji]127752[/emoji]

 

[Loving Mickey]

I am truly sorry on the loss of your precious cat. I know the pain you are experiencing all too well. Yes, our kitties are our babies and there is always that "special" kitty, the one who helps us get through life's hardships. I had a kitty like that. My Mickey helped me deal with my greatest loss, the death of my mom. I lost my Mickey over one year ago, and I still cry over his loss. Yes, he was that special, just like your kitty Dick. I wish I could say , it gets easier and I truly hope it does. For me, the pain over my Mickey's passing is still so very raw, as is the pain over losing my mom. I hope one day you will remember your Dick with smiles instead of tears. I know how truly heartbreaking it all is. Please take care!
RIP Dear Dick!
You were so deeply loved and will be always be remembered!

 

[cuvmoi]

The temptation to stay home and crawl under a blanket all day is hard to resist. I'm self employed so I could easily do it, but I won't. I went to work yesterday and held it together all day pretty well. I don't know how I did it. Came home and just lost it. This world just seems empty right now. Lots of people don't understand....this is like losing a child for me. Dick was there for me at times in my life when people weren't. Our bond, trust and love was simple and pure during a time where I'd lost faith in people. Though I was able to rebuild my life after those awful times, I never rebuilt my trust in people and am socially much different than I once was. Now who do I have the next time the world crashes down around me?

 

[di and bob]

You still have Dick in spirit, he will never leave your heart so you will never be truly alone, no matter how empty you feel right now. I know a lot of people don't understand our pain, but they are to be pitied, they have never bonded with an animal the way our hearts and souls bonded with our special ones. A bond that even death will never break. I know it is so hard right now to think the world will ever be the same again, but try to remember that he was a huge part of your life, and you are a better person to have known and loved him, then to have never known him at all. I know how much it hurts, the pain can leave you breathless but you have your precious memories of happier times to comfort you, and he would never want you to be so sad when remembering him. He left you such a special legacy of love, and taught you to love another,he would be honored if some day you would allow another sweet little soul into your heart. Not to replace him, that can never be done, but to celebrate in some small way the love you two shared by passing on a bit to another. This kind of love only happens once in a lifetime, but we can be happy again, and love again, it is as they would want for us, who they lovemore than life itself. Take care and please know we will be here for you, to offer what comfort we can, we truly do understand your pain. RIP dear Dick, you will be forever held in a loving heart, and will never be forgotten!

 

[jcat]

My condolences. Dick was beautiful and obviously a very important part of your life. It's so difficult to deal with the loss of such a close companion. RIP, Dick.

 

[cuvmoi]

 
You still have Dick in spirit, he will never leave your heart so you will never be truly alone, no matter how empty you feel right now. I know a lot of people don't understand our pain, but they are to be pitied, they have never bonded with an animal the way our hearts and souls bonded with our special ones. A bond that even death will never break. I know it is so hard right now to think the world will ever be the same again, but try to remember that he was a huge part of your life, and you are a better person to have known and loved him, then to have never known him at all. I know how much it hurts, the pain can leave you breathless but you have your precious memories of happier times to comfort you, and he would never want you to be so sad when remembering him. He left you such a special legacy of love, and taught you to love another,he would be honored if some day you would allow another sweet little soul into your heart. Not to replace him, that can never be done, but to celebrate in some small way the love you two shared by passing on a bit to another. This kind of love only happens once in a lifetime, but we can be happy again, and love again, it is as they would want for us, who they lovemore than life itself. Take care and please know we will be here for you, to offer what comfort we can, we truly do understand your pain. RIP dear Dick, you will be forever held in a loving heart, and will never be forgotten!

 Thank you for your kind words. You're right.....A lot of people don't understand. It's comforting to know that there's a few people out there who do. For years, I lived alone with Dick. He was who I'd come home to every night, and wake up beside every morning.  He became a part of me....He really did. He still is. I do know that this crushing, horrific pain will eventually lift, but I can honestly say that I've never experienced anything like it before, and I've been through some very, very difficult times in my life. He was the best friend I could've ever asked for, and I have nothing but gratitude for the fact that he chose me that day 13 years ago on that back road where I found him as a kitten. I can still remember his meows, can still remember seeing the bushes rustle and him hopping out. Those awkward looking  radar ears that he eventually grew into.....Somewhere I've got a picture of him as a kitten that I managed to salvage from when I was married to my first wife. Those crazy ears of his.....

 I've toyed with the notion of asking whether or not she (my ex wife) might still have some old pictures of him, but I doubt she does. I haven't spoken to her since 2007 (we didn't have kids, so no need), and even if she did have them I'm pretty sure she'd deny me of them just for the sheer joy of it.  Her "disposal and replacement" of me was part of her New Year's resolution for 2008. She'd hid the affair she'd had at work from me for almost a year, all the while calculating and planning everything so that she'd be set financially by the time she dropped the bomb on me.I never saw it coming.  She married the guy she had an affair with, and 6 1/2 years later, did the same thing (or something similar) to him. The sickest part of all is that, especially during the first few years, she'd periodically troll my friends and family for info on the wreck she'd left in her wake...Not because she was concerned or remorseful, but because she enjoyed hearing about how miserable I was.  Dick's companionship healed me throughout those first couple of years as I rebuilt my life and re-evaluated my outlook on the world. Eventually I got it back together and found a wonderful woman who adores me and who adored Dick as well. She is going through almost as much as I am now, and she only had 2 1/2 years with him vs. my 13 years. He was that special....Everyone who ever knew him (with the exception of that witch I was married to) was touched by him and is very saddened by his passing. None as much as me though. God this hurts.

 

[nurseangel]

I'm so sorry for your loss.  Thank you for sharing the beautiful pictures.  I hope your heart heals soon.  Bless you.

 

[cuvmoi]

 
I'm so sorry for your loss.  Thank you for sharing the beautiful pictures.  I hope your heart heals soon.  Bless you.

 Thank you. I know it will, but I also know it'll take time. I've made the mistake of bottling things up in the past, and that ends with really bad results down the line. Today was terrible, but it was better than yesterday. Each day it will get a little better. Time stopped for me on Sunday night, and this horrible crushing feeling was all that I felt. I've heard people talk about the time distortion and the "world just vanishing" when they're in a state of agonizing grief. Now I know exactly what they were talking about. I didn't before. Reality (beyond Dick's passing)  is slowly starting to creep back in for me, and that initial cluttered, insane sorrow is starting to morph into something that I can compartmentalize. I need to continue to release it when it needs to be released, and not swallow it. Gotta let it out. 

 This thread is cathartic for me, and I've been so out of my head for the past couple of days that I never thanked everyone for their kind words and support. Thank you all so much. It's so comforting to know that there's people out there who understand the bond between Dick and I, and who can genuinely sympathize. I'm generally not the kind of guy who cries. I think the last time I cried before this was when my grandmother (whom I was very close with) passed away last year....and it was NOTHING like this. I feel guilty about that, and it's also confusing to me that I've never mourned anyone to the extent that I'm mourning Dick. I don't think I've ever in my life been reduced to the basket case I've been these last few days. I really want this thread to evolve into a proper memorial for Dick...Beyond my own pain and grief. I've got some really hilarious stories about him that I'd love to share when I can bring myself to do so, and I'd also love to help others with their process of mourning as others here have done for me....All in due time.....Once I've totally "come back" so to speak. 

 Ya know, when I got the PM about my first thread being closed and the invitation to open this one, I wasn't going to do it. I'm not really much of a web forum poster, and honestly I can't really even remember starting this thread. I just did it. I'm glad I did.

 

[margd]

I know what you mean about Dick helping you get through a hellish divorce and aftermath. My two boys Milo and Wesley did the same for me. When Milo died at age 13, I was devastated and Wesley grieved as well. The pain was so deep I didn't know how I could survive such a loss and so I adopted an 8 year old cat scheduled for euthanasia at the local kill shelter. Adopting Polly was the only way I got through the horrible pain of losing Milo. She really did help in so many ways, even though she was nothing at all like Milo in temperament.

I'm not recommending you get another cat so soon, only mentioning that it does help sometimes. Everyone is different and you will know when you are ready to open heart and home to another furry friend. For now, I hope the days are getting a little bit easier as time does help eventually.

I love the photos, btw. Dick was really a gorgeous cat!

 

[Loving Mickey]

I am so sorry you are in so much pain. I wish I had some magic words to say that would help you. All I can say is that I do understand. Believe me, I do. I still look for my Mickey when I feel sad or am in pain, and it hurts so much that he is no longer here with me. I feel like screaming that he should still be with me. I am grateful though that I have my two new cats. No, they aren't Mickey but they are here and they love me. I also love them so much and they do really help with dealing with Mickey's loss. I will always miss my Mickey. I do hope you start to heal and can smile when thinking about Dick. All the best to you!
Oh, the pictures of Dick are beautiful.
Such a precious and beautiful cat!!

 

[macha 143]

I am very sorry for your loss, losing your best friend in the world is the hardest. A beautiful cat indeed.

Rest in peace dear Dick...

 

[cuvmoi]

I am so sorry you are in so much pain. I wish I had some magic words to say that would help you. All I can say is that I do understand. Believe me, I do. I still look for my Mickey when I feel sad or am in pain, and it hurts so much that he is no longer here with me. I feel like screaming that he should still be with me. I am grateful though that I have my two new cats. No, they aren't Mickey but they are here and they love me. I also love them so much and they do really help with dealing with Mickey's loss. I will always miss my Mickey. I do hope you start to heal and can smile when thinking about Dick. All the best to you!
Oh, the pictures of Dick are beautiful.
Such a precious and beautiful cat!!

 Thank you. Dick was beautiful, and he always won over everyone....Even people who otherwise couldn't stand cats. There was something more to him. I don't know what though.....I don't know if I'll ever know for sure. Like I said, he picked me. He's been with me through so many changes in my life....Not just the negative experiences. There were many positive ones too. I was 23 years old when he came into my life, and 37 when he left it. That's a long, formative period of my life with him by my side. I've come to the conclusion that I'm not going to seek out another cat, and instead leave myself open to have one come into my life like Dick did. It could be a year, it could be ten, or it could be thirty years from now. 

 

[cuvmoi]

 Oh, and his name...."Dick". I know that's a strange name for a cat, and honestly there was no rhyme or reason to me naming him that. The day I brought him home after I found him on the side of the road, I called him that. I honestly don't know why. It was the strangest thing. There were no other options....His name was Dick, and it was settled....And he responded to that name immediately. I always got the feeling that there was something more to why I named him that...Something way over my head and beyond the boundaries of things that I can comprehend. It was just such a peculiar and non-traditional name for a cat, but he couldn't be named anything else. His name was Dick and that was it.   

 

[margd]

 Oh, and his name...."Dick". I know that's a strange name for a cat, and honestly there was no rhyme or reason to me naming him that. The day I brought him home after I found him on the side of the road, I called him that. I honestly don't know why. It was the strangest thing. There were no other options....His name was Dick, and it was settled....And he responded to that name immediately. I always got the feeling that there was something more to why I named him that...Something way over my head and beyond the boundaries of things that I can comprehend. It was just such a peculiar and non-traditional name for a cat, but he couldn't be named anything else. His name was Dick and that was it.   

Nothing wrong with the name of "Dick" for a cat! After all, Dick is a short term of Richard, a name of courage - think Richard the Lion Hearted. [emoji]10084[/emoji]️

 

[ruthm]

I'm so sorry for your loss; Dick sounds like a wonderful kitty, and those are beautiful pictures of him.   Actually, Dick sounds like he was not only your soulmate, but also a "Heart Kitty".  A Heart Kitty is one who helps to fill the giant sized hole  in your heart that is left when we experience a tremendous loss, sometimes the loss is another beloved kitty, but it can also be a person.   My precious Tiger was my heart kitty who literally got me through some horrible times in my life- when I lost my two older kitties and my father in the same year.

I'm glad you wrote this post- grieving is not something that most of us are ever taught;in fact, some of us spend our entire lives avoiding the grieving process.  Two things helped me come back to earth when I lost my precious girl Tiger to cancer this summer.. One was I cleared the garden space to create a Memorial Garden in her memory; the other thing was I re-acquainted myself with an author that I had read many years ago, Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, "On Grief and Grieving".  The following passage helped me to wrap my head around what was going on and why:

"The reality is that you will grieve forever.  You will not "get over" the loss of a loved one;you will learn to live with it. You will heal, and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You wll be whole again, but you will never be the same...Nor should you be the same, nor would you want to.  The time we take following a loss is important in grief and grieving as well as in healing. This gift of grief represents a completion of a connection we will never forget. A time of reflection, pain, despair, tragedy, hope, readjustment, reinvolvement, and healing."

Fly free Dick, and land softly- you were so loved.

 

[cuvmoi]

 
I'm so sorry for your loss; Dick sounds like a wonderful kitty, and those are beautiful pictures of him.   Actually, Dick sounds like he was not only your soulmate, but also a "Heart Kitty".  A Heart Kitty is one who helps to fill the giant sized hole  in your heart that is left when we experience a tremendous loss, sometimes the loss is another beloved kitty, but it can also be a person.   My precious Tiger was my heart kitty who literally got me through some horrible times in my life- when I lost my two older kitties and my father in the same year.

I'm glad you wrote this post- grieving is not something that most of us are ever taught;in fact, some of us spend our entire lives avoiding the grieving process.  Two things helped me come back to earth when I lost my precious girl Tiger to cancer this summer.. One was I cleared the garden space to create a Memorial Garden in her memory; the other thing was I re-acquainted myself with an author that I had read many years ago, Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, "On Grief and Grieving".  The following passage helped me to wrap my head around what was going on and why:

"The reality is that you will grieve forever.  You will not "get over" the loss of a loved one;you will learn to live with it. You will heal, and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You wll be whole again, but you will never be the same...Nor should you be the same, nor would you want to.  The time we take following a loss is important in grief and grieving as well as in healing. This gift of grief represents a completion of a connection we will never forget. A time of reflection, pain, despair, tragedy, hope, readjustment, reinvolvement, and healing."

Fly free Dick, and land softly- you were so loved.

Thank you.  I feel privileged to be the type of person who had the ability to connect so deeply with one of these creatures. It's a bond and a love of the purest nature, and I pity people who don't understand and/or minimize it. I live in (lifelong, unfortunately)  western Pennsylvania and culturally, this is NOT an area where animals are treated with much dignity or decency. This is primarily a culture where cruelty is celebrated and encouraged in the youth. I never took to it. I never hunted. Dad tried to start me off squirrel hunting when I was about 8 or 9....First time we saw one on the side of a tree, I missed on purpose until the clip was empty, then started crying. I don't know why I'm like this, but whatever the reason and regardless of how it's polarized me from just about everyone around here.....I wouldn't have it any other way. It's awesome to find other people like you and everyone else who's responded with such warmth in this thread.

 It really sucks not having Dick here. He'd be leaning on my left shoulder purring right now as I lay in bed and type this on my laptop.  I miss him so much. I've come out of that initial "fog", and after much delay I should have his ashes home on Tuesday night. That will help, I think. Today my fiance found two baby mice on the basement stairs. She's been feeding them and giving them water with an eye dropper all day. I'm so fortunate to have found such a compassionate woman. Dick was quite the mouse hound, so I imagine that these two were most likely made orphans by him. We're gonna get them healthy and let them grow a little, and then release them into the wild......maybe. Or we might just let them hang around. We really haven't decided yet.   

 

[zed xyzed]

I am so sorry for your loss, he was a beautiful boy and by the sounds of it, a very special little soul.