Cats Won’t Sit On Lap Or Next To Me

[wannahelp]

I have three cats and none of them are lap cats. I show them a lot of affection. They sleep in my bed. While they do climb on top of the sofa, none of them will sit next to me or on my lap. Can I teach them to do it?
I’ve tried putting treats on the sofa and on my lap but that hasn’t worked.
What does it mean that they won’t do it? Are they no comfortable enough with me? I don’t know why that would be the case.

 

[Daisy6]

It just means they are not comfortable on your lap. Many cats do not sit on laps so there is nothing wrong with that. As for not sitting on the couch, is it ugly enough to be comfortable for you?

 

[DreamerRose]

Some cats don't like to sleep on laps or don't know how. Mingo would never curl up on my lap, and I just accepted that. Lily, on the other hand, has been a lap cat from the word go. She jumped up on my lap the first thing. Now, two years later, Mingo sometimes gets in my lap for petting. He must have learned this from Lily.

 

[Tobermory]

I’ve had lap kitties in the past, but the three I have now are not lap cats. They’re all very affectionate otherwise and are almost always in the same room with us. Well, one of them does want to sit on my lap when I’m at the kitchen table. Gee, I wonder why.

 

[danteshuman]

Have you tried putting a cat bed (the style they like) on the sofa next to where you sit. Sprinkle catnip on the bed. If a cat sleeps there ignore their sleeping there for a couple of weeks then pet them. Or try moving them to the bed when they are sleepy or sleeping. Then soft petting their cheeks/ears so they go back to sleep?
Are you sure you want a lap cat? Mine seems to always get on my lap when I need to pee

 

[rubysmama]

My Ruby is a lap cat. But I have found she prefers to nap in my lap in the winter time when I have a throw/blanket over my lap and legs. So maybe when you have cooler weather, try putting a soft blanket over your lap and see if any of them might like that.

Course it could just be that they aren't lap cats. My Ruby, though a snuggly lap cat, absolutely hates being picked up, so I never get to cuddle her in my arms.

 

[RajaNMizu]

I have one lap cat (Raja) and one cat that is not (Mizu). From day one, Raja would crawl into my lap and most anyone else's as well. Doesn't really matter where we are sitting, the couch is good, kitchen table, floor...she will sit with you anywhere. Mizu would rather play with you and investigate things. Mizu likes to crawl on people's shoulders and have a look around. I just think they're different and have different preferred ways of interaction. I have noticed that if Raja is curled up on one of us, Mizu will take notice sometimes and curl up near by. I used to think that she might have been jealous and would try to move her but if we do that, she leaves. However, if you're sleeping on the couch, Mizu enjoys curling up on your back. Different strokes.