4 Month Old Kitten Is Very Clingy/ Dependent

[Diesel92]

Hi everyone, so my girlfriend and i decided to adopt a kitten from a local humane society after we had a stray kitten we brought in pass away, he was kind of a spur of the moment "lets bring him in" and we fell in love with him. Now we have a 4 month old kitten that we adopted and she is very sweet and well behaved but she is VERY clingy. She will not stop meowing unless my girlfriend or i pick her up and all she wants to do is cuddle and sleep instead of play. Shes been eating decent i guess maybe a full can of soft food a day and a few mouth fulls of hard food a day. She also likes to hide under the couch when no one is home but wont go potty under there either because ive noticed wet spots in the litter box. Is this abnormal for kitten her age to hide when we leave and constantly cry out when she isnt being held? The only other cats i have had have been adult cats when i was little that lived in the barn. Thanks!

 

[susanm9006]

Are you absolutely sure she is hiding all the time while you are gone? It is possible that the noise of you coming and going makes her hide, but while you are out, or even during the night she is up and playing. Most kittens want to be held when they are sleepy. Some kittens who are like that outgrow it as they reach adulthood and others would rather be with their people than anywhere else.

 

[Diesel92]

Are you absolutely sure she is hiding all the time while you are gone? It is possible that the noise of you coming and going makes her hid, but while you are out, or even during the night she is up and playing. Most kittens want to be held when they are sleepy. Some kittens who are like that outgrow it as they reach adulthood and others would rather be with their people than anywhere else.

Not absolutely sure, but she doesnt really eat much unless we are home, i have been monitoring her food since we had gotten her a few days ago, nothing seems out of place from where i leave it but she might be up playing all night i do sleep pretty hard

 

[susanm9006]

A video cam would be great, but if not I would set out toys in specific places and check them in the morning and after returning home to see if they are where you left them. If she isn’t playing, only sleeping and hiding, then you want a thorough vet check, especially if she hasn’t has one yet.

 

[Diesel92]

Okay thanks ill definitely do that, other than that she is a very happy kitten and constantly kneads on me and never stops purring while shes snuggled up to me and gives me lots of head bumps and likes to rub her face on mine

 

[Shane Kent]

She might be traumatized by something. Let her be a little clingy and set up a cozy spot for her with some blankets. You could use a box on it's side they love that, cheap and easy A spot close to you, after all she is a little animal that needs some attention and loving. They calm down once they get comfortable in their new home. Don't worry it won't last forever but the kitten was just separated from her family so a little separation anxiety. She can form a new bond with you and her new home it just takes a bit of time and patience.

All the best to you and your new little kitty

 

[1 bruce 1]

If you're very concerned, I'd suggest a good check up at the vet with a blood work (if you haven't already done so) and speaking to the vet about your concerns.
Otherwise, I'd consider this a kitten that's still a bit un-confident from her early days, and finds confidence in you, and (I mean this kindly as I'm ALWAYS in the same boat), a clever kitten that's "trained" you to pick her up when she cries! =) This isn't a bad thing. This is just cause and effect for her. She wants held, she cries, you pick her up, all is well. I don't advocate stopping this because this is a killer way to create a great bond. But maybe you could get something like a cat wand to play with her and teach her how to "hunt" and be more independent. If it doesn't teach independence, it's hilarious to watch them dilate their eyes, leap, cartwheel in the air, etc.!
Most kittens at 4 months IME are kind of learning that independence on their own, but they have a Mom cat and siblings to help teach them. Not knowing her history, she may have grown up as a loner and never learned.
I would not stop the holding and cuddling, but would encourage her to learn to be a "Cat" by letting her catch and kill fake stuff (catching and killing live stuff, unless a stray mouse happens into your house, isn't recommended!) and letting her run off with her toy/kill and think how cool she is.
I guess my own aim with cats is a certain level of independence but still some kind of dependence and bond on us humans that we can share for years.
JMO =)

 

[Diesel92]

I was told by the lady at the humane society that she had found her when she was only a couple weeks old abandoned in the middle of the field out behind her house and she took her in and nursed her to health. We do have an appointment with our vet who still makes house calls that is going to come and see her this coming weekend and give her a good once over. I actually just tried tying a mouse toy to a string a minute ago and she seemed to enjoy chasing it but quickly became bored and she wanting to be picked back up thanks everyone!

 

[1 bruce 1]

I was told by the lady at the humane society that she had found her when she was only a couple weeks old abandoned in the middle of the field out behind her house and she took her in and nursed her to health. We do have an appointment with our vet who still makes house calls that is going to come and see her this coming weekend and give her a good once over. I actually just tried tying a mouse toy to a string a minute ago and she seemed to enjoy chasing it but quickly became bored and she wanting to be picked back up thanks everyone!

This is good news to me!! =)
If she gets bored after 20 seconds, stop the play at 10-15 seconds and leave her wanting a bit more but don't skimp on the picking up/holding.
Good that you've got what sounds like an excellent house call vet! I wish more vets did this, there's such a demand for house/farm calls..
Due to her history she may never have learned how to be a cat, and probably did not have a mom or litter mates to teach her how so she's not sure what she's doing. IME these make GREAT pet cats as they DO learn how to do cat stuff but they have an early imprint with humans that makes them very fun to live with.
We have two bottle raised kittens here, no siblings or Mother, and they were loner bottle babies and are SUPER amazing, almost dog like.

 

[catlover73]

It sounds like your kitten was under-socialized from being away from mom and siblings too soon. I would try a variety of toys to see if you can engage her. My Starbuck loved aluminum foil balls when she was a young kitten. She did not understand wand toys right away. She also liked the cardboard rings left over from toilet paper. It was easier to engage her with toys that would roll around on the floor. My Starbuck was abandoned out a car window at 4 weeks old and rescued by a friend's family. I adopted her at 6 weeks old. She was also very clingy at the time much like your baby. She over time became more secure in her new home and also became more independent.

I am not sure if this is a possible option for you. I had other cats when I adopted Starbuck and they really helped her adjust. My cats were much older so I was very lucky they accepted a young kitten so easily. Perhaps you could look into trying to adopt a slightly older kitten or young adult that was properly socialized to teach her how to be a kitten. If this is not possible then just keep trying new toys and you will find the right one. Also once she is completely used to her new home the clingy behavior should fix itself. Enjoy it while it lasts because it is adorable.

My Starbuck is a happy independent 12 year old adult now. She is still very affectionate but does not want or demand constant attention. She is perfectly happy to be near us without having to be held all the time. She is happy to lay on the couch next to me and sleep on the bed with us. Sometimes she falls asleep with her paw touching me. She only wants to be picked up to be taken to bed at night or for her nightly snuggle time with daddy. Daddy used to pick her up and hold her like a baby when she would cry as kitten. She still demands her snuggle time from him every night but now it is one time as opposed to every time he sits down at his desk in our den.

 

[elliesvictim]

Just a heads up, when she hits "teenage" phase she won't want to know ya, so I'd enjoy "clingy".
Also kittens are still figuring things out like
"Are they coming back"?
"What's that noise"?
"What's dangerous"?
I wouldn't over think it
Good luck

 

[Diesel92]

Well the day after this post she really started to open up to us, started scratching her post, found toys scattered all over the house when i got home from work, and found out she really likes aluminum foil balls lol. She also goes berserk over this mouse toy i found that skitters across the floor when you pull its tail! Plus shes eating ALOT more now and absolutely freaks out when i come home definitely seems like a happy kitty

 

[catlover73]

It seems like she just needed a little more time to adjust to her new home. She seems to have found her confidence. The clingy stage is adorable but does not last forever. When she hits the teenage independence phase you start to miss the clingy phase. One of mine went from being a clingy kitten around the same age as your baby to being completely independent. He stopped coming to bed with us and only wanted attention once in a while. If you tried to pet him and he was not in the mood he would run away. He has found middle ground again. He sleeps cuddled up with hubby now. He will come lay next to me on the couch when he wants pets.