Bijou is jealous! (long post)

bijou's mom

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We have had our Cornish Rex Bijou, for nine years. For the first four years of her life, she lived with other cats. Two others when I lived at home with my parents, and then two more when I moved in with my husband. After a couple of years, my husbands cats succumbed to old age and passed away. So for the past five years Bijou has been our only cat. Not that it matters, but we also have a pug, Maddie. Well, my brother and SIL have two cats that have grown up together and we don't know what happened, but all of the sudden they didn't like each other anymore and one started peeing all over the house. They worked with the vet, but couldn't make her stop. They thought moving into their new house might solve the problem, but after a couple of weeks, she started doing it again. They couldn't have a cat peeing all over their brand new carpets, so they had to give her up. No one wanted this cat and the no kill shelters were full. This cat started life as a feral and my SIL tamed her. They looked and looked for a home, to no avail. Since the cat was so skittish and nervous, they made the decision to try her on a dangerous medication to calm her in hopes of stopping the peeing. The vet worked with them on all of this. Well, the medication did not work, so they made the decision to put the cat down, rather then have her bounced from house to house. My SIL was VERY upset, so I said that I would try Sweetpea at my house. She actually has fit in quite well, but Bijou seems SO jealous! They don't claw at each other or anything, and now can walk past each other without hissing, but even though we give Bijou lots of extra attention it seems like every time I turn around, there is Bijou watching and screaming. Now Bijou is a very loud kittie to start with, but it seems like she is having a hard time adjusting to Sweetpea. Sweetpea on the other hand, seems to be adjusting beautifuly. I think it made a HUGE difference that she already knew us and our pug. She loves the dog, and us too. She hid for the first couple of days, but now she comes out to visit and beg for can food. She will always be skittish, but that's ok. She was that way with my SIL too. She likes to hide under the bed or in our closet, so we leave that door open so she will feel safe. She is fine as long as you move slowly. I can tell that she want's to be friends with Bijou. She tries to play with her, but Bijou will have NONE of that. Whenever we pet Sweetpea, Bijou screams at her, frightens her away, then wants to be picked up and cuddled which is really not like her at all. I think that in time Bijou will get used to her because she HAS lived with other cats and she got along with them just fine. The difference is before, Bijou was the last cat to join the mix. So I'm thinking Bijou is the alpha in this particular situation. Does anyone have any ideas making this transition a little bit easier. It hasn't been very long yet only about two weeks, and they ARE getting slightly better. I am now in love with Sweetpea and I can't see her going to yet another home where she might not be understood. She has been very clean so far, and they both have their own sandboxes in different rooms, because Bijou will NOT use Sweetpea's box. Bijou is using her own box too, neither of them are marking or anything. I thought last night we were having a breakthrough, because Bijou sniffed Sweetpea's fanny when she wasn't looking, but unfortunetly she startled Sweetpea, who didn't see her. They both hissed at each other, then Bijou screamed and chased Sweetpea away. Then Bijou followed me around and made SURE that I didn't pet Sweetpea or pick her up. Bijou is normally very independent but I can tell she is being clingy becuase she is jealous. Anyone have any ideas to make this easier for both of my cats? Or haven't I given it long enough yet? BTW, I took her off of that horrible medication my SIL was using, I don't belive in medicating to keep them "calm". She seems fine without it to me. Besides, my vet said it would signifgantly shorten her life span.
 

malena

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I think it needs more time. Even if they never will like eachother there is a good chance they will learn to co-excist. We took in a bunch of wild cats three month ago and our two cats was slowly introduced to them. Since six weeks all tha cats are living together and we don't have any fights so far but our Domestic cats Izzy and Zasha is still hissing at the kittens sometimes. Izzy is still very unsafe with the situation but with lots of love and attention she is slowly accepting it and since a week she even lets a couple of kittens sleep in our bed as long as they keep distance.
Give it more time.
There is ways to speed things up as Felliway, vanilla extract and mixing their smells but other people on the forum has more experience of that than I have.
 

peachytoday

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I think more time is in order. You are doing the right thing and making sure Bijou gets attention. I introduced my cornish rex, Zander to three already established cats and he immediately took over and he just powers his way to get what he wants. Not in an over agressive way just when he wants something he wants it. I can have one of my other cats on my lap for some cuddle time and he has been known to jump up and swat them away. My rex is a total lap cat. I just make sure everyone gets equal time even if it means I put Zander back on the floor and retrieve the other cat. He gets the idea but he still keeps trying. I would love to see some pictures of both your babies.

Tricia
 

faganfamily1

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I am having a simular problem with my resident cat lately- he is having such an attitude problem! Since we brought in mirabelle, he wont go near my husband...I guess he blames him for bringing her in the house. If mirabelle is around us- he will go and hide and watch her and us. Will this go away soon? And also strange- he grooms her!!!!! make up your mid already!!
 
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