Is this okay?

lookingglass

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My new neighbor just moved in over last weekend, and they have a baby. I haven't met them, but the baby has cried all night every night for the last three days. I really need some sleep, especially with my back hurting the way it does right now. Is it okay for me to ask them to move it into a room that doesn't border mine?
 

miagi's_mommy

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I think it should be fine to ask them that in a nice way.
(not that you wouldn't say it in a nice way..
)
 
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lookingglass

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Originally Posted by Miagi's_Mommy

I think it should be fine to ask them that in a nice way.
(not that you wouldn't say it in a nice way..
)
Maybe I could bribe them with some cookies and bread.
 

miagi's_mommy

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Originally Posted by lookingglass

Maybe I could bribe them with some cookies and bread.
hehehe..or ask them what their favorite kind of dessert is and say I am just wondering and get it for them.
 

leli

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I think cookies or bread is a great idea. Bake something, then bring it over as a welcome gift. I'm sure they'll chit chat with you a bit and you can just happen to mention how the baby has been keeping you up....quite the lungs on the little tyke or whatever. Keep it light, just drop the hint and see if that helps. They may not realize how thin the walls are in their new....I assume apartment or townhouse since you mentioned a shared wall. Good luck!
 

emily_325

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I agree with taking them a welcome basket with something you've baked. Then as you were chitchatting I would ask about their baby, maybe ask if the poor little guy/girl is collicky, and say you were wondering because you hear him/her pretty much every night and it doesn't seem like he/she sleeps at all. Keep it light. And don't focus on that as the majority of the conversation.

Like others have said, it's not like you would go over and be rude anyway. Doesn't seem your nature.
 

crittermom

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I would make it small talk as others have said.Or maybe you could use a box fan for your room to help drown out the baby's cries.
 
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lookingglass

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Thank you... all I'm making cream cheese and blue berry muffins. I hope they take it well. I'm thinking that this may be a brand new Mom who is a bit scared out of her mind. We shall see how it goes.
 

angelkitty

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The welcome basket might be nice.. If you live in an apartment she might have the same problem on the other side of the wall. Plus the rooms maybe too small to switch with her child.

I would recommend to her a few things that soothe a baby. Especially a new little baby, such as the mommy heart beat bear, or the fisher price fishtank for the crib. Or maybe a white noise CD,, she could get them online for practically nothing. Or a lullabye CD that sometimes works too. If the baby is collicky she might be at her wits end and needs a friend badly. Especially if she is a single mother. Maybe the suggestions will help with the baby. Most new moms who have to go through this are already frazzled,, so I would go at it with caution,, big time.. She might be waiting to snap or cry or something. So if she gets insulted or snappy,, it's not at you,, it's at her situation. I just would hate for it to go bad for you.

Otherwise,, maybe invest in a fan, or a turn on your tv to drown out the crying. Trust me walls in apartments are paper thin,, i heard things when I lived in an apartment that I would not speak about..


Hope that helps..
Heather
 

krazy kat2

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If you have a Dollar Tree near you they have a cd called Natural Sleep that is wonderful. It has soothing music with ocean and bird sounds. It would be good for either one of you. I use it for massages, and my clients usually go to sleep. I made a copy for a friend that has a child that does not sleep well. Now she asks for her music before she goes to bed, and usually sleeps through the night.
I hope things get better for you, and you have nice neighbors.
 

annasmom

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Spike those muffins with some infant gas drops!
Seriously though, why would anyone let their baby cry all night? Especially if its a tiny one, they should not be left to cry and cry. I would monitor the situation and make sure she's taking good care of her little one in addition to being neighborly and getting yourself a good night's rest.
 

emily_325

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Originally Posted by angelkitty

I would recommend to her a few things that soothe a baby. Especially a new little baby, such as the mommy heart beat bear, or the fisher price fishtank for the crib. Or maybe a white noise CD,, she could get them online for practically nothing. Or a lullabye CD that sometimes works too. If the baby is collicky she might be at her wits end and needs a friend badly.
Or even just a vacuum. My sister's first baby was a handful and cried until my poor sister would just hold her and cry with her. My sister eventually discovered that the white noise of the vacuum soothed her and she could sleep through it. My sister burned out the motor on her vacuum that way of course.


Of course if she did this, you might have issues sleeping through that too... Hmmm....
 
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lookingglass

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Time for an update on the neighbor:

She's 19 and scared out of her mind! I told her, as gently as possible, that her baby was keeping me up at night, and she broke down in tears. I felt so bad! She told me that the little one had colic, and there wasn't much that she could do. Really, it just looks like she could use a break from being in a small apartment with a baby that cries all day and all night long. Honestly, I feel worse now about going over there then I did when I was just hurting and tired. Now I know how she feels.
 

annasmom

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Originally Posted by lookingglass

Time for an update on the neighbor:

She's 19 and scared out of her mind! I told her, as gently as possible, that her baby was keeping me up at night, and she broke down in tears. I felt so bad! She told me that the little one had colic, and there wasn't much that she could do. Really, it just looks like she could use a break from being in a small apartment with a baby that cries all day and all night long. Honestly, I feel worse now about going over there then I did when I was just hurting and tired. Now I know how she feels.
Did she seem receptive to advice? If so suggest Mylecon (sp?) gas drops. My daughter had colic and those as well as a special way to hold them--face down with mommy's arm pressing firmly against the baby's belly--was the only way to keep that child from crying all the time.
 
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lookingglass

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Originally Posted by AnnasMom

Did she seem receptive to advice? If so suggest Mylecon (sp?) gas drops. My daughter had colic and those as well as a special way to hold them--face down with mommy's arm pressing firmly against the baby's belly--was the only way to keep that child from crying all the time.
She did seem receptive; she also told me that she had a doctor's appointment later on today to help out with the colic. Honestly, I was thinking of trying to baby sit for her for a few hours on Sunday, just so she can go out and do some grocery shopping without the baby. I think with her stress level and the baby not feeling well she is at the point of where she would need a break. My heart just goes out for her.

I went out today and bought some ear plugs.

Umm... how long does colic last?
 

fwan

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Uh oh!
Youre in for it!

I think thats really nice of you to baby sit for her!
Poor girl she is so young!
I hope it works out soon!
 

laureen227

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Originally Posted by AnnasMom

Did she seem receptive to advice? If so suggest Mylecon (sp?) gas drops. My daughter had colic and those as well as a special way to hold them--face down with mommy's arm pressing firmly against the baby's belly--was the only way to keep that child from crying all the time.
gentle warmth will also help to relieve the gas pains...
 

kluchetta

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Originally Posted by lookingglass

She did seem receptive; she also told me that she had a doctor's appointment later on today to help out with the colic. Honestly, I was thinking of trying to baby sit for her for a few hours on Sunday, just so she can go out and do some grocery shopping without the baby. I think with her stress level and the baby not feeling well she is at the point of where she would need a break. My heart just goes out for her.

I went out today and bought some ear plugs.

Umm... how long does colic last?
That's so nice of you. I'm sure she could use a break, I just can't imagine having a baby with colic. Hopefully the doctor will think of some things - possible lactose intolerance, or something. Earplugs are a good idea - but colic can last a long time sometimes, I've heard.
 

annasmom

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Originally Posted by lookingglass

Umm... how long does colic last?
It usually peaks out at about 3 months. I don't recall having any colicky episodes after that, but again every baby is different and colic is one of those blanket diagnoses given when there is nothing else to explain the problem.
 

crittermom

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Does she have a swing for the baby?If not,suggest one,it helped calm my youngest when he had colic.How old is the baby?If the baby is still young, a blanket used to swaddle them like they do in the Hospital works really good too.
Mylicon (or generic works too) is a WONDERFUL help!!
A Mother Bear is also handy to have.Pacifiers do wonders also.
Since every baby is different,colic can last from a week to months.
I would see if maybe Mom needs a break and needs someone to chat with.New Mom's are ALWAYS frazzled and seem to REALLY need friends to sit and talk to about what ever.
Seriously though, why would anyone let their baby cry all night? Especially if its a tiny one, they should not be left to cry and cry. I would monitor the situation and make sure she's taking good care of her little one in addition to being neighborly and getting yourself a good night's rest.
With colic,sometimes NOTHING works to quiet the baby!
 
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