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Help, I'm A Kleptomanicat

post #1 of 61
Thread Starter 
My name is Jack and I'm a kleptomanicat. (group says. "Hi Jack") I think I've had this problem for some time now, probably from when I was in Australia. It started with toys, my breeder says that I was very possessive of my favorite red ball. When I got to Hawaii, I thought I was turning over a new blade of catnip, but it was not to be.

I started hoarding the toy mice that my new owners provided. Keeping them away from that 'other cat' in the house. Whenever they try to play with her, I was compelled to steal the toy. Even if I already had one of my own. Soon, I had all the toy mice and as if by some miracle, they kept coming.

My problem was, once I had them, I had to stash them to keep them from 'her'. To do this I created my "lair" behind the "Big Cat's" bed. This was perfect because I could place things there and nobody could see them.

Now my problem spiraled out of control. With a safe haven for my booty, I went on a binge. I found that if I stole pens from the desk, more pens would always appear. I knocked one of those cat brushes into my hiding place. One of the "big cats" wears reading glasses... I got 'em. I even tried to carry a coat hanger back there, but it was too bulky and I kept stepping on it when I was walking.

Pretty soon, loose items became harder to find, so I turned to the garbage. Inside there were all kind of things, plastic bags, Q-tips, kleenex, even those empty cases that held contact lenses.

I knew I'd hit rock bottom when I started stealing egg shells from the sink. Oh this wasn't that bad, but I made a big mess when I knocked a whole egg of the counter and started eating it right there in front of the very upset "big cat". I couldn't help myself! I was powerless to stop!!! Fortunately she intervened by placing the remaining eggs in a bowl. Damn, those round things in the shell were slippery and impossible to get out of that bowl no matter how hard I tried.

(Group says, Thank you Jack for sharing......)
post #2 of 61

I'm lucky mine only steals socks!
post #3 of 61
Thank you for posting that!
It was really funny to read!!
post #4 of 61
Hilarious! Rowdy knows how to open drawers and steals bras.
post #5 of 61
How funny!!! You must dread looking behind the bed
post #6 of 61

Next he'll figure out where all the treats are stashed and how to get 'em!
post #7 of 61
My old cat Simba figured out to open the cupboard doors and get to the treats and also went in with the pots and pans and 'walked' admist them.
post #8 of 61
I fear what would happen if Jack and Bit were friends.
post #9 of 61
That account is too funny. Jack you are a very naughty little boy, but that just makes you even more adorable.
post #10 of 61
That was pretty cute My ziggy used to take my lighter, cigrettes, dollar bills and look back at me and keep going, she out grew it though, found a pile behind the sofa
post #11 of 61
Hilarious! And how wonderful that you have him in group therapy! Maybe my boys can join too! They both steal small items (hair ties, rubber bands, bag ties, small children's toys) stash their mice underneath things to get more, Jacob is a door and cupboard opener and then Loki tears into the treat bags once Jacob has opened the cupboard.
post #12 of 61
Hi, Jack...

I have two limited kleptos (both Bengals) named Frankie and Rishi that my boyfriend and I share care of. If I don't remember to lock up their toy closet, I will definitely come home to find a profusion of toys scattered all over the floor throughout the hallway and the living room.

The cats also love to go into the bathroom and steal disposeable razors from the tub, so now we have to remove all the heads from the razors if we leave them lying in the bathroom. We're always finding disposeable razor handles all over the place, and often when I'm in another room, I can hear the sounds of handles beings pushed across the hardwood floor.

I'm just glad Frankie and Rishi are over the phase where they dig through the trashcan for used tissues.

I also used to take care of a cat in Ohio who would steal everybody's chapstick. No chapstick was safe! If you left your chapstick out after I warned you, I had no sympathy when you couldn't find it in the morning. When I moved from that particular apartment, I found a considerable assortment of used chapsticks behind the couch.

Anyways, aloha from one HI resident to another! The cats live on the Windward side with my boyfriend, while I live in Waikiki myself.
post #13 of 61
Thread Starter 
Thanks for all the replies, and aloha to Chaos! I decided to take some pictures of my 'booty' and I was carrying the Canon digital elph by the wrist strap to take some pictures, and for some reason "they" got really upset and stopped me and took the camera away.

They insulted me, called me a stupid cat and muttered something about "...$400 camera...." I am puzzeled by this behavior. Then to make matters worse, when I got back to my lair, all the things were gone! "They", must have taken my hard earned goods!
post #14 of 61
This is a cute thread.

My sweetie adorable looking Pandora has a sock fetish (she doesn't like to admit it and she isn't looking right now so I can share this).

She takes off with socks, she doesn't care what color they are...and they are never seen again (Perhaps she is in cohoots with the Sock Gnome....).
post #15 of 61
Aloha Jack from another Hawaii resident. I've enjoyed reading about your adventures. As the owner of a Canon camera I can understand why "they" were unhappy when you tried to use the camera. Naughty boy.

To Jack's owner- welcome to TCS. Jack sounds like a fun kitty. Fortunately my kitties have outgrown their klepto phase plus I learned through hard experience to keep anything small out of sight behind closed doors. I never knew what I'd find on the floor in the middle of the room. Pens and socks were common, though.
post #16 of 61
Sláine, my hand to heaven, tends to steal sharp and dangerous things - big knives, scissors, boxes of matches - luckily she is not subtle and we get them back fairly quickly from her.

(Obviously, we've taken to hiding them, now.)
post #17 of 61
Thread Starter 
Since "they" took my stuff, I'll try to find a better hiding place. I needed to start from scratch, so this morning I decided to get some contact lens containers. Unfortunately I couldn't find any used ones in the garbage. I did find a strip with 5 attached to eachother on the bathroom counter. HA! I managed to take these when "his" back was turned. Those foil tops are fun to chew on! He ran after me yelling......

BTW, What does "sterile" mean?
post #18 of 61
It means not covered in cat spit, among other things. Humans have weird ideas about that sort of thing.

Hi, Jack, you are one smart kitty! I like to chase combs and stuff like that off the bathroom counter, and across the floor, but they stop playing when they get onto the carpet, so I go do something else then. But soon the humans help them back onto the counter and we can play again.

I hope you find another good place for your stash.

post #19 of 61
This is a wonderfully cute and funny post!!! Thanks for the chuckles.
post #20 of 61
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by rapunzel47 View Post
Hi, Jack, you are one smart kitty! I like to chase combs and stuff like that off the bathroom counter, and across the floor, but they stop playing when they get onto the carpet...

Dear Fawn,

I have noticed this too! The combs, and pens stop playing when we hit the carpet! I wonder why it's like this? I like to carry coathangers around, it's a lot of fun, but kinda hard cause I keep stepping on it when I walk. To make matters worse, "they" laugh at me when it's knocked out of my mouth! "They" are very mean to me....and mock me and call me names.

"They" call the other cat Chloe but I call her "miss goody two shoes" "They" never seem to scold her!? This persecution is very unfair.
post #21 of 61
Hi Jack, I haven't tried coathangers. They sound like fun. My humans seem to hide them, though. Hmmmm... They mock me, too...they call me crazy kitty, and little maniac, but know what? I get back at Mum she freaks out when I play on the stairs and hang over the edge at her...she's afraid I'll fall off, but that's just silly -- I'm a caaaaaaaaaaaaaaT
post #22 of 61
Aloha Jack!

Hi, I'm LuckyGirl! I too can be a klepto, although I don't really think it's a bad thing if your taking all of your own stuff right?! I have what I call a graveyard for my crinkle balls. I put them under the bed, my Meowmy has these pull out racks for her shoes, and I put all my crinkle balls under there. This way, the parents buy me new ones! My meowmy also referrs to me as the sock monster. I find this a little upsetting because I am not a monster, I am a beautiful young lady, who just happens to have a sock fetish. Nothing wrong with that right? Oh, and I only like clean socks, as in I steal them right from the laundry basket while they are still warm from the dryer.

PS....lucky for you I have a thing for bad boys!!!

post #23 of 61
Ha! This is so funny! Serenity has a special "stash", as well, behind the fan, where she'll hide all sorts of items that she's stolen away..toys, socks, pens, etc., and yes, even cotton balls!

Here is Serenity in her little hiding spot!

post #24 of 61
Hi Jack. My name is Rowdy and I stash things, too.

A couple of Christmases ago, Mom took down the tree (such lovely toys) and moved the couch. She found the 27 ornaments, a dozen miniature Reese's peanut butter cups, several hair ties and milk bottle rings, that I had stashed under there and took them ALL away. She put away the ornaments and it was a WHOLE YEAR, before I got a chance to get some more

Since then, she also puts the candy in dishes, with lids and I can't get to it.
post #25 of 61
Originally Posted by halfpint View Post
That was pretty cute My ziggy used to take my lighter, cigrettes, dollar bills and look back at me and keep going, she out grew it though, found a pile behind the sofa
ok, i've got to tell you what my meowmy did... she brot home a box of luvlee smeelng long wite things - thay smelt like MINT wich i luv but win i chooed the box opend meowmy gotted veree upset wif me & putted the wons lef inna plastik box i cant choo open i dont no wy she makes them burn but wont let me choo them... ~ Java
post #26 of 61
Originally Posted by halfpint View Post
That was pretty cute My ziggy used to take my lighter, cigrettes, dollar bills and look back at me and keep going, she out grew it though, found a pile behind the sofa
I can just picture a sweet little kitty going into a bar with his pack of smokes, his lighter and his cash! One catnip martini coming up!!!
post #27 of 61
I never would have thought to stash and hide my toys. I much prefer to steal food. Like last week, meowmy and her friend were eating something that smelled wonderful...i think they called it...um..STAKE??? Well, silly friend looked away and I managed to grab a hold of the end of it, and made a dash for the closet. Darnit if meowmy didn't catch me, and take it away. She will never find where I hid that muffin she has out for breakfast this morning though....

signed, yours in kleptomania

post #28 of 61
Funny thread Our local ball player (pawball player?) just loses his balls under the fridge and behind furniture, but never stashes them on purpose.
post #29 of 61
Originally Posted by Anne View Post
Our local ball player (pawball player?)
Clever, Anne!
post #30 of 61
My name is Jamie, and I'm a kleptomanicat. I like to steal guitar picks and Christmas tree ornaments, which I stash under the living room rug. I used to keep them under the stereo, but Daddy threw that away, so now I have to use the rug and couches.
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