Need helpful advice!

Hi everyone, I was so excited to find this site. I have taken in, and rehabilitated many, many animals (birds to raccoons). However, they were injured and didn't or couldn't run. The domestic animals I've had all adopted
me (no trust issue) Untill now!
2 months ago, the most beautiful feral male Siamese wandered into my backyard; skinny,skinny so I began to put out food twice a day. For me it was instant love and I expected a quick reciprocation;he had other ideas. Thats when I learned the difference between stray and feral. At the beginning he wouldn’t eat till I was long gone, however I have slowly moved the dish closer to the house and he is now eating just inside the screen door. I have named him Tuffy (conveys his personality)

To make a 2 month process shorter, he is now coming in the house to explore, he is such a talker and comes to my call, he has a huge fluffy bed he sleeps in all day outside (never leaving my yard). This is all progress, but now my problems..

1. After 2 months and all this progress Tuffy still will not let me touch him; I can put my hand on his food dish and sometimes he’ll eat out of it but try to raise it to pet and I get hisses, growls and even a whack or two (never using claws) He is not fixed, and I want to get that taken care of; as well as getting him shots and inside the house before the rains come. How do I catch a cat I can’t touch without loosing all the trust?


2. I have another female (calico) in the house name: Cali she is queen very old and rescued as well she hates the new intruder hisses, growls etc.. I have to take he upstairs and close the door when Tuffy explores and then she pouts turning her back on me sometimes hissing at me , will they ever be able to become tolerant of each other? How do I do it? Or will Cali turn her back on me forever!

This rescue seems to be more special and important to me then any before because of the time I’ve invested and the challenge it has presented. So, any advice would be more then appreciated.

My thanks in advance,
Stacie

Hi, Stacie! We're so glad you've joined us and look forward to getting to know you better! Bless you for all you do for these precious little ones. Let's move this to our Strays and Ferals Forum so our experts in this area will be sure to see it! Please feel free to contact me any time at all that I may be of assistance to you!

Welcome to this forum!

I have some thoughts.

Take him in before the rains?. One variation is to wait for the rains and cold weather. Then he will probably want himself in...

When you try to pet him. Most semiferals dont like to be petted on the head - rised hands is a threat. Try to pet on the back or chin.
Him whacking with soft paw is a good sign in a way. So are they educating their friends and their kittens. Scratching for enemies.

Try to use the food situations. Ie give him food in small portions - but often. So there will be very many occasions and situations for action.
It is a classic advice!

I will surely come on more ideas later, and lets hope others will fill in.

Good luck!

If Tuffy is truly feral and not a stray, there is a chance that he will never become "socialized". I cared for a feral for 11 years and got 2 pets on him in all that time - once as a kitten to take him in to be neutered, and once again a few months before he crossed. Of course I've had others that I've successfully socialized and they sleep in bed with me at night. Every cat is different and each cat will choose for themselves.

The more you try to insert yourself on him, the less of a chance that you will have in gaining his trust. If you are absolutely serious about trying to make him respond to you, get him inside permanently. Once there, completely ignore him, but continue to provide food at a regular basis, and include wet food in the mix at the same time each day. Feral or not, cats like routine.

If Callie does not accept him, and a cat at her age may decide that she doesn't want to adjust, you do have the option of building an outdoor shelter where he will at least be out of the rains. A sheltered, well cared for outdoor feral is not a bad life - I've had some live beyond 13 years with good care.

My outdoor ferals have adapted to me well enough that they follow me as I walk the dogs and will sometimes come in at night. They will never be lap cats, but I can give them scratches on a regular basis without them bolting.

Tuffy will decide what he wants to do and you only need to be patient with him.

Hi Stacie,

Don't give up too soon on your little stray. A number of years ago I had much the same situation as you do now. It took from Aug to Jan before I could actual hand this big boy (once he acquired a proper weight for his sized he tipped the scale at about 20 lbs). After that it was clean sailing, he turned out to be a wonderful addition to the family.

Cali sounds a lot like my calico, N.C. My that kitty could hold a grudge. Just give Cali time and extra attention. I'm sure, if your patient, she'll come around. Just make sure there is no actuial fighting between the two.

hairballmom

I saw in parallell-forum the semiferal is already fixed and inside. Splendid!

Proceed as they suggested, take it easy and slow. It will be great with time!

As to your other cat.

a) Use Feliway electrical diffuser. Already now, as she surely understands something is going on.
This shall be on till they are good friends.

You may also have a diffuser in his room, but most important in hers.

b) when it is time to begin to introduce them, begin with having a net door between his room and hers compartments.
So they can look at each other, sniff, their smells and scents will be wellknown - and mix.

c) the day it is time to let them meet, it is most important there are good possibilities to get away, to take shelter...
It lessers the stress too...

d) dont forget to pet her very much, so she knows she is number one in your heart.

e) hopefully they will be friends, or in any case - pals. But is is enough if they simply tolerate each other, two cats living in the same house. This happens sometimes, not all are becoming friends.

(They being forever enemies - happens, but unusual - and lets hope this will not be the case her)