want to help my fraidy cat

Hi guys! I've been a cat owner for roughly two weeks now. He's a small, 2yo black cat named Merlin, and was given to me by a very good friend who had two other cats and two dogs and was worried he was feeling too bullied.

Truly, Merlin loves it here in the one bedroom apartment my husband and I share, as he is subject to much attention. He's a very social creature -- for example he came out and lay with my 15yo sister in law within about 5 minutes of meeting her. He is pretty strongly bonded with me, too. He'll let me lay my head on him and listen to him pur while I pet him, and last night he started licking my nose.

But he does tend to be a little skittish. Any sudden moves or noises and he'll run away. If I'm laying on the couch petting him, and my husband turns on the blender in the kitchen, Merlin will stand up immediately and look at me like, "omg what's going on??!!" My husband says when he gets up to go into work in the morning, Merlin alternates between following him around and running in fear. I've tried to communicate to this cat he's got nothing to be afraid of, but he still overreacts to fast movement or loud noises.

The thing is, I don't know if this is an adjustment issue (ie that he just doesn't completely trust us yet), or a permanent part of his personality. I am sad to report that after my good friend's ex roommate moved out, she found evidence to support that she may have abused the cats by locking them in a trunk when they were naughty. If this is the case, maybe he's just afraid I'm going to lock him in a trunk??? That's a horrible thought as I wouldn't dream of it.

I'm pretty sure he understands and doesn't fear my method of discipline, which is to essentially say, "That is NO" in a very stern voice. He listens and obeys well (I've got a great cat.) But anytime something loud or sudden happens or he feels like he's being forced to stay somewhere, he freaks.

So I just wondered what I can do about it, if anything, and whether you think it's an adjustment issue or what.

Thanks very much for your time!

Sincerely,
Christy & Merlin

It could very well be an adjustment issue. Some cats are also just more sensitive than others to loud noises and sudden movement. Our Emma is probably always going to be a little bit skittish, and we've just come to know that we need to approach her slowly and quietly. However, it has gotten markedly better in the past year and a half that we've had her. Give your kitty plenty of time and space to adjust to his new environment and I'm sure eventually he will be calmer and more "well-adjusted".

My Ginger is a bit skittish, and I've had her since she was 8 weeks old. She starts at loud noises, and runs away when I go toward her - looking over her shoulder at me the whole time. I learned early that she generally wants me to chase her when she does that - she likes to play tag, - but I've also learned that a 155 lb woman running through my apartment is a bad idea, LOL!

If I move my hand or my body too fast she starts, yet if she is doing something she's not supposed to, no movement or loud voice or clapping will budge her, LOL!!! I think she has selective hearing!

She is a spoiled rotten little kitty who has never been abused, unless it happened in the 8 weeks before I got her from the shelter. I've just gotten accustomed to the fact that she's a little high-strung.

I agree with Olly - just give him time and space and love, and he should settle down a bit over time, as I'm expecting Ginger will.

Added to this: Because I am bringing home a feral kitten in two days, I've been doing lots of research in old threads, looking to be sure that his intro to my house and resident queen is as easy as possible for him. The more I read, the more apparent it seems that perhaps my Ginger was a feral born kitty, and perhaps her skittishness stems from that.

As another poster once said, when I sneeze, or cough, or blow my nose, Ginger jumps and runs, and it seems that such noises are startlingto those that were wild-born.

Just another thought that makes me go: Hmmmmmmm.....Perhaps Merlin was a feral kitten before he was adopted by your friends?

And there are breeds that are more skittish than others, like my Russian Blue (vs e.g. a Persian).

you could try leaving some music on during the day or getting some sounds cds with different loud noises like fireworks and such. i know they make them for horses and dogs. not sure where to get them though someone on here might! you can also try desensitizing her. get her in the room with the blender in her cat carrier. sit with her and talk to her put a little cat nip in her bed in the carrier and turn on the blender or what ever the offending noise is. leave it on till she starts to calm down pet her and praise her during all of this even offer treats or tuna! slam pots or drop silverware, can, etc and get her used to the noises. be sure to praise her and give her a food reward each time you finish and she is calm. watch her expression don't stand in front of her join her from the sides and don't stair her in the face if you do be sure to blink frequently. blinking is a sign of comfort and contentment. let us know how you get on!

Originally Posted by OllyExtra05

It could very well be an adjustment issue. Some cats are also just more sensitive than others to loud noises and sudden movement. Our Emma is probably always going to be a little bit skittish, and we've just come to know that we need to approach her slowly and quietly. However, it has gotten markedly better in the past year and a half that we've had her. Give your kitty plenty of time and space to adjust to his new environment and I'm sure eventually he will be calmer and more "well-adjusted".

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I agree with all of this. I think you might find that its a combination of adjusting to his new environment and the fact that he was treated badly in the past. Cats have great memories and it may take him some time to learn to trust again. Give him time and I am sure everything will be okay and if not... well it just means that he will get lots more extra love

My Cedar is very VERY skittish and originally I tried everything in my power to change that. He has been with us for 3 years and he is still scared of so much (ranging from guests to a feather that falls in front of him).
I have now learnt how to deal with all his fears and he truely is happy here.

good luck!! and welcome to TCS I hope you & Merlin stay for a while

I have had my kitten for 2 months and he has gotten much less skittish since getting him. This is mainly due to the fact that I have 4 and 6 year old children and they can be very LOUD (screaming and crying)! He has gotten much better at tuning them out since we first got him.

If he doesn't like a noise, he will just run out of the room. I can actually vacuum with him in the same room now and he doesn't leave.

My Callie cat is a skittish kitty and I've had her for 9 years now. She's gotten so much better over the years, but she still startles easily if I stand up too quickly, sneeze, make some sudden move, or if she hears some strange noise outside. Time and trust will help your little guy. Once he begins to trust you some of those behaviors will go away. It will take lots of patience and lots of time for him to get to this point, however, because of his past treatment. I applaud your friend for finding him a more suitable home, too!

Have you tried Comfort Zone w/ Feliway plug ins? Those help my girl tremendously. You might also want to try some Bach's Rescue Remedy. That stuff has really helped my Callie chill out since we got our new kitty!

Stephanie

I moved in April and some of my cats didn't adjust to the new location until about 3 months later. Merlin is actually less skittish now, after 2 weeks in his new home, than some of mine are after living with me for nearly 10 years.

Every cat is different, but it sounds like Merlin is simply adjusting. He sounds like a wonderful boy!!!