Okay... this is probably going to end up as a rant... because I'm not in the best of moods.
All my life, I've been close to my family. Though, the older I got.. the weirder it got.
I was in public school for only part of kindergarten, because my mother and the teacher didn't get along.
So the mother decided she could homeschool me.. that went on until grade 6.
I was at home 24/7. No social interaction other than the family, and every sunday my grandma took me and my two younger sisters to church.
I was put into a private religious school when I was in grade 6. Though I was a year olfer than everyone else in my grade, because the mother didn't homeschool me properly. Throwing down a book and paper on the table isn't the best way to do things.
So it took me while to warm up to people. Always been shy, probably due to being at home with the only people I knew all the time.
Made some wonderful friends.. had great time.
Then grade 8 came.. and I was pulled from the private school I had come to know.. and thrown into public school.
I stopped doing everything. Church, stopped going because I wasn't being forced to go anymore.
Then i started skipping school any way I could. Even if it meant sticking my fingers down my throat to make me sick, so I could stay at home.
I stopped telling them things.. which only got worse.. because of the thoughts of hurting myself that I got around that time.
Eventually, she pulled me out of there.. and tried homeschooling me again.. but that didn't work out.
We moved into the city. Lots of people.
Eventually I found the cat rescue I currently volunteer for. I had to have my sister go in and talk to them about volunteering... thats how shy I was. And I didn't go in, unless my sister went in.
She found things to do though.. and I ended up ging in by myself one day.. and met some people. Made friends. And started going more and more.
That became my life.
wake up. Take dog out. Feed dog. Go to rescue. come home. eat. go back t o rescue. come home. sleep. start over.
thats it.. for almost two years like that. Though internet time was put in there at about 6 months.
I got over my shyness a little bit. Having to deal with new people everyday at the rescue. Answering phones, talking to people about cats, going out to fundraisers at the mall or park or wherever.
Well.. about 3 or 4 weeks ago, I met this guy online. Myspace.
After talking for about a week.. we decided to meet. (Though I swear we've already met.. he looked familar and it's a small town)
We spent all day in the park. First date ever. First kiss ever.
he even said that it seemed like I had lived a sheltered life... I didn't tell him he was right.
I didn't tell my mum where I was going or who I was with. I was gone for 8 hours.. 11am- 7pm.
They called the COPS. They had people out there looking for me.
Come on.. seriously? I am 18 years old.. almost 19. I am not a baby anymore.
So I decided to not tell them who I was with, and lied.
We went out again 2 days later.. for a bike ride along the trails and then back to the park.
Again we saw each other at his place, had dinner with his famly, and saw a movie.
Then I hadn't seen him for almost a week.. when I HAD to invite him over for dinner at my house.. otherwise the mother said that I wasn't allowed to date him.
Dinner went fine.. he was here from 2pm-11:30pm. we watched movies, and had dinner.. and he decided to go home when he noticed how tired I was getting.
I was going to go over to his place last night to watch Prison Break with him, and have a bbq.
And I don't know what her problem was.. but I wasn't allowed to go.
Meanwhile.. my 16 year old sister is out, god only knows where with god only knows who, doing god only knows what. And here's the 18 year old.. stuck at home.
Is it just me... or is that a bit messed up?
I finally have a life, and she is trying to keep me from it. And it's not the typical teenager.. 'Oh my parents are ruining my life I hate them yadayadayada'
Because thats not it..
It's like.. she's trying to keep me safe.. but she's only hurting me in the process.
It's like she's trying to keep me prisoner.. my sisters have been in public school their whole life.. except one went for two years to the private school with me, and the youngest only for a year.
I didn't even go to highschool. I am just finishing up my GED now.
Blah.. big rant about my life. I just needed to get it out, I guess. Makes me feel a little better anyways.
All my life, I've been close to my family. Though, the older I got.. the weirder it got.
I was in public school for only part of kindergarten, because my mother and the teacher didn't get along.
So the mother decided she could homeschool me.. that went on until grade 6.
I was at home 24/7. No social interaction other than the family, and every sunday my grandma took me and my two younger sisters to church.
I was put into a private religious school when I was in grade 6. Though I was a year olfer than everyone else in my grade, because the mother didn't homeschool me properly. Throwing down a book and paper on the table isn't the best way to do things.
So it took me while to warm up to people. Always been shy, probably due to being at home with the only people I knew all the time.
Made some wonderful friends.. had great time.
Then grade 8 came.. and I was pulled from the private school I had come to know.. and thrown into public school.
I stopped doing everything. Church, stopped going because I wasn't being forced to go anymore.
Then i started skipping school any way I could. Even if it meant sticking my fingers down my throat to make me sick, so I could stay at home.
I stopped telling them things.. which only got worse.. because of the thoughts of hurting myself that I got around that time.
Eventually, she pulled me out of there.. and tried homeschooling me again.. but that didn't work out.
We moved into the city. Lots of people.
Eventually I found the cat rescue I currently volunteer for. I had to have my sister go in and talk to them about volunteering... thats how shy I was. And I didn't go in, unless my sister went in.
She found things to do though.. and I ended up ging in by myself one day.. and met some people. Made friends. And started going more and more.
That became my life.
wake up. Take dog out. Feed dog. Go to rescue. come home. eat. go back t o rescue. come home. sleep. start over.
thats it.. for almost two years like that. Though internet time was put in there at about 6 months.
I got over my shyness a little bit. Having to deal with new people everyday at the rescue. Answering phones, talking to people about cats, going out to fundraisers at the mall or park or wherever.
Well.. about 3 or 4 weeks ago, I met this guy online. Myspace.
After talking for about a week.. we decided to meet. (Though I swear we've already met.. he looked familar and it's a small town)
We spent all day in the park. First date ever. First kiss ever.
he even said that it seemed like I had lived a sheltered life... I didn't tell him he was right.
I didn't tell my mum where I was going or who I was with. I was gone for 8 hours.. 11am- 7pm.
They called the COPS. They had people out there looking for me.
Come on.. seriously? I am 18 years old.. almost 19. I am not a baby anymore.
So I decided to not tell them who I was with, and lied.
We went out again 2 days later.. for a bike ride along the trails and then back to the park.
Again we saw each other at his place, had dinner with his famly, and saw a movie.
Then I hadn't seen him for almost a week.. when I HAD to invite him over for dinner at my house.. otherwise the mother said that I wasn't allowed to date him.
Dinner went fine.. he was here from 2pm-11:30pm. we watched movies, and had dinner.. and he decided to go home when he noticed how tired I was getting.
I was going to go over to his place last night to watch Prison Break with him, and have a bbq.
And I don't know what her problem was.. but I wasn't allowed to go.
Meanwhile.. my 16 year old sister is out, god only knows where with god only knows who, doing god only knows what. And here's the 18 year old.. stuck at home.
Is it just me... or is that a bit messed up?
I finally have a life, and she is trying to keep me from it. And it's not the typical teenager.. 'Oh my parents are ruining my life I hate them yadayadayada'
Because thats not it..
It's like.. she's trying to keep me safe.. but she's only hurting me in the process.
It's like she's trying to keep me prisoner.. my sisters have been in public school their whole life.. except one went for two years to the private school with me, and the youngest only for a year.
I didn't even go to highschool. I am just finishing up my GED now.
Blah.. big rant about my life. I just needed to get it out, I guess. Makes me feel a little better anyways.