TheCatSite.com › Forums › General Forums › The Cat Lounge › Exercise in keeping my mouth shut
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Exercise in keeping my mouth shut

post #1 of 20
Thread Starter 
Now I am not very good at this. If I feel strongly about something I will speak my mind. But tonight I exercised my self control and stayed quiet.

We went to a friend for dinner for the first time and they have 1 cat and 2 ferrets. The cat is declawed and not only is allowed outside, but is allowed outside day and night. It comes and goes as it pleases. Not only that but he thinks it's hilarious to hiss and growl and bark at this at who is scared of people, and not terribly sociable - I'm not surprised!!!!! She says now that she really regrets having the cat declawed, and wishes she hadn't done it. Apparently at age 6 months in her New york apartment the kitten was tearing things apart, so the housemate gave her an ultimatum - declaw the cat or get rid of it. She decided declawing was her only option. Now we all know that is the WORST option!! I mean of course a 6 month old kitten is going to get bored in an apartment when she's home by herself all day! So she gets punished by getting her claws removed

The 2 ferrets are very cute (I'll post pics of them somewhere), but he was overly rough with them - throwing them at each other to make them play with each other, putting them in this tube thing, then putting the 2 ends of the tube together so the poor little things couldn't get out - even when they started trying. Apparently they're not very toilet trained, and one of them went in a corner while we were there, and he picked it up, blew in its face repeatedly, sprayed it IN IT'S FACE with a water mister - and the mister was just centimetres away from the poor little things face, then he rubbed its head into the wee (quite hard I felt), then saturated it with the mister because he said the ferret hates water.

I felt horrible, and expressed that I thought that was enough, and they should try other methods to prevent it going rather than trying to punish her which she doesn't understand. His wife occasionally told him to settle with them, but I think it was purely for my benefit.

I figured that no matter what I said they wouldn't change anyway. I told them in a calm manner why declawing was so bad, which they agreed on, but I think they just have no idea about animal emotions, and that maybe the way they treat their pets is the cause of the ferrets not using the litter tray properly, and why the cat is so freaked out by life in general.

post #2 of 20
I sympathize. If you see any obvious signs of animal abuse you can report it to your local humane society or SPCA but it would have to be something that would clearly be recognized by these authorities as animal cruelty.

You don't need to keep your mouth shut. Tell them how you feel. Make them think about their actions.
post #3 of 20
Thread Starter 
There was definitely no animal abuse, and I think I said enough to make them aware that I didn't approve without offending new friends...

Ferrets are certainly illegal in California and one of them was looking quite bald which is potentially stress, but of course vets around here won't see ferrets since they're illegal, so I could report them for that...

The ferrets certainly liked people enough to want to play without biting or getting aggressive.

Sigh.....
post #4 of 20
There is a very very fine line between animal abuse and ridiculing an animal for natural behaviour like the way they have.
I believe they would have gone further if they hadn't seen how it affected you.

I personally would say these 'friends' of yours ridicule those animals to the point of possibly overstepping that very very fine line.

These kinds of cases are the ones that are the most difficult to prove animal abuse when it does happen,as the person responsible just disposes of the body and says it died of old age or something and throws the body in the trash.

Whatever you do don't fall out with these people.Those animals may need you.

I personally think if they can treat those animals like that then the animals WILL need somebody to watch out for them and the only person that obviously knows things are not right is you.

I would call the spca or someone confidentially,and ask their advice.

Me personally I think I would get someone to liberate them
post #5 of 20
sorry i would have gone off about the ferrets. and also about let the cat outside with out its front claws.

but that is just me
post #6 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahp View Post
There was definitely no animal abuse, and I think I said enough to make them aware that I didn't approve without offending new friends...

Ferrets are certainly illegal in California and one of them was looking quite bald which is potentially stress, but of course vets around here won't see ferrets since they're illegal, so I could report them for that...

The ferrets certainly liked people enough to want to play without biting or getting aggressive.

Sigh.....
It does sound like abuse to me - not necessarily intentional, but abuse. Ferrets are very like kittens in most respects - if you wouldn't do it to a kitten, you shouldn't do it to a ferret.

And being unable to get adequate care for an animal is neglect - on top of which, if it is likely to be stress (and it sounds like it well could be) they have caused this problem themselves and are aggravating it.

I would suggest you consider reporting them.
post #7 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by furryferals View Post
There is a very very fine line between animal abuse and ridiculing an animal for natural behaviour like the way they have.
I believe they would have gone further if they hadn't seen how it affected you.

I personally would say these 'friends' of yours ridicule those animals to the point of possibly overstepping that very very fine line.
I think so too.
post #8 of 20
My neighbor next door had a declawed cat and shortly after they moved in he told me she was declawed and I said you let her outside? And he said oh yeah don't worry about her..Well she hasn't come home in over a year now...I wonder if hes worried now...Not to mention the guy is a DR.
post #9 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bella713 View Post
My neighbor next door had a declawed cat and shortly after they moved in he told me she was declawed and I said you let her outside? And he said oh yeah don't worry about her..Well she hasn't come home in over a year now...I wonder if hes worried now...Not to mention the guy is a DR.
I have neighbors like that too. They got the cat when they were already struggling to feed themselves and their kids, and subsequently are almost always out of cat litter and cat food, so they let their declawed cat out day and night to use the bathroom and laugh when it gets into catfights. They live right on a busy road, and it's only a matter of time until it doesn't return.
post #10 of 20
Thread Starter 
I have to say - the cat has been going outside for a while now, and can climb trees, and had a "fight" with a neighbours cat, which just involved her yowling very intimidatingly at the other cat, and the other cat backed down.

The cat was quite happy to come up to me for a pat, just after he had been "hissing" at the cat, so that's why I was hesitant to say anything.

I think I'd like to go over again, and see if maybe he was "showing off" a little and is more settled next time. If the ferret looks worse then I'll definitely report them.

He truly does adore his ferrets, and she claims to be an absolute animal lover, I think they're just a little "misguided".
post #11 of 20
I probably would chalk up the declawing to stupidity, and I do understand that she was kind of under pressure to get her cat declawed because of the former room mate. I might have done the same thing, ( even though I don't believe in declawing) if I were told my baby had to get declawed or else. I know some apartment complexes require that your cat be declawed.

However, the abuse of the ferrets would have been too much for me. If I felt that I couldn't say anything, then I would have had to leave. I couldn't stay and watch it. It would just make me sick to my stomach. Hopefully, he was just "showing off" for his guests, and that he doesn't normally abuse them in that manner when no one is visiting them. After all, a lot of men like to show their machismo by playing "rough" with their pets. I wouldn't like it, though. Not one little bit.
post #12 of 20
Sounds kinda harsh. Maybe they need some advice on how to use other methodes to train their pets.
post #13 of 20
I'm glad you could hold your tongue. Mine would've gotten me thrown out.
I am much like you as my head and mouth work in different time modes. If I see something that needs to be dealt with, my mouth will start before my brain has time to catch up. (But only at certain times.)If I saw that, I'd take the ferrets from the guy and hold them so he couldn't hurt them (at least while you were there) either intentionally or not. If he tried to get them back to punish them I wouldn't give them to him. I'd just go into different ways of dealing with the situation and hopefully that would fix things.
I agree with others though, those animals need you, you are their lifeline. Stay their "friends" for as long as you need to, and get those animals out of there.
My DH would never treat my animals that way in front of anyone I know. Macho crap is not an excuse, stupidity is. I can't believe the woman isn't standing up for her animals and telling him to knock it off.
post #14 of 20
I'm sorry but I don't think I could have kept my mouth shut. It really shocks me the way some people treat animals.
post #15 of 20
I feel your discust. I was over at one of my 'friends' new house a couple of weeks ago. She had a dog that was a papillion (sp?). She was only about 4-5 months old and she was still really tiny. She started getting a little rough with my other friends son, so her husband picked this little dog up, smacked it really hard on the nose. This poor dog yelped for 20 seconds strait. These are tiny-fragile dogs to begin with. And worse, when she introduced the dog to me, she called her her money-maken dog. They're going to breed her and sell her puppies. She doesn't care about this dog at all. She's even said before that she really hates animals in the house. Some people sicken me.
post #16 of 20
You know it really breaks my heart to think of these poor innocent animals stuck in homes, where they are hit, slapped around, and/or just used to make money for the owner. These poor creatures don't know what it is to get love any more than the feral on the streets, but what's even sadder for them, they can't get away. They are imprisoned with cruel uncaring owners. It just makes me want to cry.
post #17 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by LunaLou View Post
I feel your discust. I was over at one of my 'friends' new house a couple of weeks ago. She had a dog that was a papillion (sp?). She was only about 4-5 months old and she was still really tiny. She started getting a little rough with my other friends son, so her husband picked this little dog up, smacked it really hard on the nose. This poor dog yelped for 20 seconds strait. These are tiny-fragile dogs to begin with. And worse, when she introduced the dog to me, she called her her money-maken dog. They're going to breed her and sell her puppies. She doesn't care about this dog at all. She's even said before that she really hates animals in the house. Some people sicken me.
Please call the SPCA.
post #18 of 20
Thread Starter 
I did offer advice on how to stop the inappropriate weeing - litter boxes in the corners, always fully supervise when they're out and put them straight into their litter tray when they look like they're going to go - if they hate water, put a bowl of water in each corner - things like that. And when she mentioned declawing the cat, I dragged the full story out of her, and just made it clear that she knew how cruel it was and the potential behavioural problems it can cause.

Since it seemed obvious she would never do it again (she was 21 or so at the time, and the vets were more than happy to do it and thought it was a great idea), I didn't press on that too much.

I also frowned and did "ooh be careful" type reactions whenever I thought he was getting a bit too excited with them...
post #19 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by Satai View Post
Please call the SPCA.
Unfortunately, there isn't one in that area. It's a tiny little county and her house is way out in the country. Seriously, if I called anyone who would have the athority to do anything, they'd probrobly just laugh at me. The animals have no advocate where I live. It's pretty sad.
post #20 of 20
I would report that asap. That DOES sound like abuse.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: The Cat Lounge
TheCatSite.com › Forums › General Forums › The Cat Lounge › Exercise in keeping my mouth shut