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Is this a sign that something might be wrong at home??

post #1 of 16
Thread Starter 
Hello all--

I posted a while back about a little kitty who had followed me home (several blocks) from a walk; I was wondering how I could figure out whether or not he was a stray.

I asked around the neighborhood, and I eventually found out who his owners are. Comforted that he did belong to a loving family, I assumed that the whole thing was over.

Not so simple. I continue to go on walks, and every time I pass close to the kitty's house, he runs out to wherever I am and then follows me wherever I go! I admit that I totally encouraged this at first by petting him, but even when I do my best to steel myself against his entreaties and ignore him, he still follows me for blocks. Last night, I brought him back to his house four times! When I finally got away clean, it was because I did my best to disappear-- but I could hear him crying out until I got too far away.

I certainly don't think he's being abused... but maybe he's starved for attention? Or maybe this is normal behavior and I've just never come across it before. I don't really think there's anything I can do here... what on earth would I say to his owners? Are you sure that you're loving your cat enough? Yeah right. But my heart just goes out to the little guy!
post #2 of 16
Could you talk to the owners and explain that he keeps following you? It may be that he just has a very overly friendly personality, but if i was his owner i'd want to know that he was doing this. Also by speaking to them you may get a better idea of what type of owners they are like.
post #3 of 16
Definately find out what kind of owners they are. Explain how he is to them and judge what to do from there. If they seem really uninterested or rude then the next time you find him, keep him until THEY come looking for him or put up a flier or make some sort of effort. If they know where you live and you think they will first suspect you (in a good or bad way) then tell them that you figured they didn't want him since they keep letting him outside and he comes back to you.
post #4 of 16
ehh i say steal him. Im a sassy person
I guess i would just allow him over for visits. hed most likely return to his own home after a while.

I live in an apartment building while in college and the day i moved in this huge cat walked right into my apartment and plopped down on my kitchen floor. he ate mikeys food and just hung out. he hissed at mikey but continued to just hang around as if he owned the place. i finally got him out and he started crying and scratching at my door. after a while he became my pal and often came over for turkey slices and belly rubs. just one of those things i guess.
post #5 of 16
Thread Starter 
Oh, I would *so* adopt him if I knew his owners truly didn't want him-- I have met them (they do know about the first time he followed me) and they seem nice enough. They have a young child, so I imagine that maybe they just don't pay much attention to their cat.

What I really want to do is buy him a detachable collar-- the owners responded to the first incident by tying what appears to be a shoelace (no tags) quite tightly around his neck.
post #6 of 16
OMG! A SHOELACE?!?!?!?!?

That is really horrible. I hope they are just totally and completely ignorant. That is just... unbelievable.

I would also allow him over whenever, and let him go home whenever, thing, and if he stayed... well, he stayed. Unless the "owners" come around looking for him or fliering, youre not doing anything wrong. Pretty much I agree with what has been said.

My sister recently started feeding the neighbors cat, because they obviously werent, and now she lives on her front porch. It was so sad, a beautiful sweet girl who was declawed and outdoors, and had all these mats in her fur and was just sooooo skinny. And soooo friendly.

Dont kidnap the kitty, but if he wants to hang out with you, let him.
post #7 of 16
About 6 weeks ago I noticed a pretty little grey tabby hanging out in my yard. Of course I put food & water out. After a few days I got close enough to notice that she'd been recently spayed. Hmmm. She never seemed to leave my yard; each morning she was outside the back door, mewing for breakfast. Just about the time I decided she was in need of a home, she showed up wearing a flea collar. Then I was confused; who spays a cat & lets it roam? After another week or so I put an ad in the paper, figuring maybe someone's cat had gotten out of the house & they couldn't find her. After 4 days a guy called me, told me where he lived ( 2 houses away) & described the kitty perfectly. Turns out he has a doggy door & the cat comes & goes whenever. In fact, he told me hadn't seen her for days. I said, "Of course not, she's always in my yard!" So, she's still here all day & she gets all the attention she deserves, and come winter--if she's still out there--I'm bringing her in.
post #8 of 16
Several years ago, a cute little grey cat came around acting very friendly. I knew she lived in the neighborhood, but I wasn't sure where. She wanted to come in, but I wouldn't let her, at first. But she was very persistent, and we eventually let her come in. I always made her leave after a little while - didn't want to be accused of cat napping!

One New Years Eve, she came around, and it was very cold out. We didn't want to just send her out in the cold, so we got the number off her tag and called. Found out her family was away (in Germany). Went knocking on a few doors and found out who was supposed to be watching her. Well, they weren't home either! Hubby went to the store and got some food and a litter box and let her settle in (We left a message on the answering machine that she was here).

From that time, she was a frequent visitor, sometimes staying all day, sometimes all night, sometimes both. At first, I would put her out at night because I felt guilty about it. Eventually, we got to know the neighbors - a very nice couple from Germany - and they indicated that it was okay if she visited with us. I know they cared a lot about Misty, but she was a free spirit and they knew it. She started life in a shelter, was adopted by a college girl, who gave her to her roomate, who brought her home to her family. That family was across the street from the German couple - and had two cats already. Misty started hanging around at their house, and eventually they worked it out that they adopted her. They planned to make her an indoor cat, but she was so unhappy, they let her out. The whole neighborhood knew Misty, and loved her, she was such a sweetheart.

When I first got to know Misty, I used to think they didn't care about her, just let her run around, didn't care where she went. As I got to know them, I learned they cared very much for her and took good care of her. Once when Misty was obviously sick, I went up there to tell them. I was fully prepared to take Misty to the vet myself, but she didn't even hesitate, came right down the street and got Misty and took her right to the vet.

This is long winded. I guess my point is, just because a cat "adopts" you, doesn't mean she's being mistreated at home, and doesn't mean she's unhappy. Of course, it could be that, and if she ends up wanting to spend all of her time at your house, maybe the people would allow you to adopt her. I have a friend who had a cat turn up on her porch after the hurricane. She found who the owners were, but also found out that the cat had been mistreated there, so she kept him. I think she did the right thing.

As for Misty - her family moved back to Germany and took her with them, and I was heartbroken. They were nice enough to call us when they got there to let us know she - and they - had made it fine. They also let us know that Misty was settling into her new home, and had made friends with two cats from next door. I miss her terribly, but if she were still here - I wouldn't have my Swanie and Cindy (because we refrained from adopting cats, knowing Misty would not have been happy having cat's in "her" territory.)

I hope everything works out the best for you and for the kitty.
post #9 of 16
Talk to them and tell them that you really love the cat and it seems mutual and ask if you can adopt him.

Chances are they will say yes anyway because it sounds like they are neglecting the poor thing

He sounds like such a sweetheart
post #10 of 16
If they don't want to give the cat to you please ask them to keep the cat indoors. It's very dangerous having the kitten wandering the streets, it could be killed or seriously injured.
post #11 of 16
I had Fred's brother, Mister Kitty, for 7 years, and they were indorr/outdoor cats. (I didn't know it was such a serious matter to keep them in then.) He decided he no longer wanted to live with us, and went to live with the old lady down the street. She was alone, and adored the cat, so I didn't take him back. She took him inside and he was her constant companion for several years. When she passed away, her grandkids took him. They loved Granny's cat, so I was glad he got another good home.
post #12 of 16
Nothing angers me as much as people who let their cats roam around outside. Especially kittens. Do these people allow their children to play in the traffic too?
I would take the cat and give it a safe, loving home. Any cat wandering around without ID and a collar could be considered a stray. And it's just not safe to let domesticated animals fend for themselves against cars, other animals, disease, mean people who torture cats, etc. It's inhumane.
I think the kitty doesn't like where he lives and is doing his best to find someone who will take of him. And he chose you.
post #13 of 16
Whether or not you think its right to allow cats outside, you can't just steal people's cats. To follow your extreme example, would you kidnap someone's children because you didn't like how they were being reared? We know the cat has a home, you can't just take it and keep it inside. I would be tempted too though. If you bring it over, let it go home whenever it wants until it either chooses never to leave your yard or the other people don't care if you keep it.
post #14 of 16
missy became a regular visitor we have patio sliding doors in our bedroom that during the summer we leave open she would come in every night and jump on the bed i put up posters and an ad in the local paper and no one claimed her so ive gone from no cats to 4 in the space of 2-3 months (she was pregnant)
post #15 of 16
its just really sad that they have this kitten but didnt bother to attain any knowledge on how to properly care for it (or just dont care)

a shoelace around the neck?! come on.
post #16 of 16
What about coming right out and offering to buy the cat (for a small fee)? They may be ready for it!
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