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Diary - Funny!

post #1 of 5
Thread Starter 
Received this in an email this morning...thought you guys would get a kick out of it!

As seen in a dog's diary :

7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!

8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!

9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!

Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!

2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!

3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!

4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!

6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mom! My favorite!

7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!

8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!

9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!

11 pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!

As seen in a cat's diary:

Day 183 of my captivity... My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre
little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The
only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild
satisfaction that I get from clawing their furniture.

Tomorrow I will eat another houseplant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they
were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the stairs.

In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again
induced myself to vomit on their favourite chair. I must remember to try
this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make
them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in their
hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was

Hmmm, that did not work according to plan ...

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the
food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers
of inducing "allergies."

I must learn what this is and how I may use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog
is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a

The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them
regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current
placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I have patience, I
can wait, it is only a matter of time
post #2 of 5
hahahaha! I've read this before and it never fails to get a laugh out of me. I always imagine that Mica thinks like this.
post #3 of 5
I LOVE that!!! I ran across it a while back and forgot about it! It never gets old! That was soo cute
post #4 of 5
Love it.
post #5 of 5
I've never seen that, thank you!
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