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- Aug 16, 2006
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hi i'm new to this forum, and i need some advice.
about two years ago, my husband decided to take in a kitten from our neighbors. i was against it because our daughter was only 3, and i didn't want to have to divide my attention and affection because i know that kittens are like babies who require care and affection. he took the kitten in anyway, and immediately she spat and hissed at my daughter whenever she entered a room. i told my daughter to avoid the kitten(give her space), and i also told her the kitten is not a toy. eventually, the kitten warmed up to my child, and now they are inseparable. the cat sleeps with her, and chases her around the house, and our yard. all in all, the cat has adjusted quite well(especially after spaying, and our family's relocation) and she does not display any bad behavior.
the problem is her strange fixation on me. i will say this now...i do not dislike cats, or any other animal. i am simply indifferent. i do not bother the cat, i tend to avoid her. she gets plenty of love and attention from my husband and daughter, but somehow that isn't enough. i tend to be extremely solitary when time allows it, and i love private moments to myself. the cat will interrupt my reading, or any other hobbies i enjoy when i'm alone. some might see this as endearing, but i see it as a nuisance because i RARELY get a moment to myself. my husband argues that i do not mind when our daughter interrupts my hobbies, so i shouldn't mind the cat. i definitely do not see it this way. the difference is that when my daughter comes to me at these times, i normally cuddle with her for awhile, and go back to what i was doing. when the cat does it, i get annoyed, and sometimes repulsed. i know it sounds harsh, but it's true.
i tried to be more affectionate towards the cat(because of husband's nagging), and it was about a week before i was avoiding her again. this is just who i am, and i don't think i can change it. i am starting to feel alot of undue pressure for me to change for the sake of this feline, and quite frankly it makes me angry. will my lack of affection for the cat have any effects on her? should i try again to give her more attention? am i a cat hater because i do not want to be bothered? is there anyway to curb the cat's clinginess? i would really appreciate some honest answers no matter how blunt.
about two years ago, my husband decided to take in a kitten from our neighbors. i was against it because our daughter was only 3, and i didn't want to have to divide my attention and affection because i know that kittens are like babies who require care and affection. he took the kitten in anyway, and immediately she spat and hissed at my daughter whenever she entered a room. i told my daughter to avoid the kitten(give her space), and i also told her the kitten is not a toy. eventually, the kitten warmed up to my child, and now they are inseparable. the cat sleeps with her, and chases her around the house, and our yard. all in all, the cat has adjusted quite well(especially after spaying, and our family's relocation) and she does not display any bad behavior.
the problem is her strange fixation on me. i will say this now...i do not dislike cats, or any other animal. i am simply indifferent. i do not bother the cat, i tend to avoid her. she gets plenty of love and attention from my husband and daughter, but somehow that isn't enough. i tend to be extremely solitary when time allows it, and i love private moments to myself. the cat will interrupt my reading, or any other hobbies i enjoy when i'm alone. some might see this as endearing, but i see it as a nuisance because i RARELY get a moment to myself. my husband argues that i do not mind when our daughter interrupts my hobbies, so i shouldn't mind the cat. i definitely do not see it this way. the difference is that when my daughter comes to me at these times, i normally cuddle with her for awhile, and go back to what i was doing. when the cat does it, i get annoyed, and sometimes repulsed. i know it sounds harsh, but it's true.
i tried to be more affectionate towards the cat(because of husband's nagging), and it was about a week before i was avoiding her again. this is just who i am, and i don't think i can change it. i am starting to feel alot of undue pressure for me to change for the sake of this feline, and quite frankly it makes me angry. will my lack of affection for the cat have any effects on her? should i try again to give her more attention? am i a cat hater because i do not want to be bothered? is there anyway to curb the cat's clinginess? i would really appreciate some honest answers no matter how blunt.