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am i spoiling my kitten??

post #1 of 12
Thread Starter 
I've only had my kitten a month or so, and she's very sociable and playful, and she loves to cuddle up in my lap , nibbling my arms and sometimes dozing off But my parents seem to think that letting her sit on me etc is spoiling her and I should just distance her, but I don't see the harm! She's not being forced to do anything, she comes and goes when she wants, and if she wants to climb on me I just let her. What do people think?
post #2 of 12
I think that distancing yourself from her is bad because she won't understand why you suddenly don't want her near.
It's not like your forcing her to stay in your lap! She just loves to cuddle with you.
Spoiln your baby w/loves and cuddles is NEVER wrong! She deserves your love! Why, I spoil mu pookie poo all the time!
Oh yeah, and welcome to the site!
post #3 of 12
If your parents think that is spoiling, then spoil her as much as possible. I'm a little suprised by their reaction? Most people like a friendly lap cat? Afterall petting your cat is shown to lower blood pressure, I don't think they meant that petting your cat on the floor at your feet lowers blood pressure . Maybe they are thinking of your cat as a mouser role, ie working cat? Either way a little loving will only be appreciated and make her a devoted companion.
post #4 of 12
Kittens are meant to be "spoiled."
post #5 of 12
Most cat people, including me, like "lap cats" and don't think it is spoiling a cat at all to let the cat on your lap. Personally, I think it's a privilage to have a cat on my lap. In fact, one of my cats will sleep on my lap and not my husbands', and it is an embarressing inequality in our household.

If your parents are refferring to the fact that you let your cat "nibble" you, though, then you are spoiling your cat in a way that might have very negative consequences for your cat in the future. If you let your cat bite, your cat will continue to bite as it grows up, and you will have trained your cat to be a problem cat. It's even more of a problem with attacking; if you play with your kitten by having her attack and destroy your hand, fingers or arm, she will continue to do so in the future, and you will get very seriously scratched when she is older. Depending on who owns your cat when she gets older and who she scratches, if you train her to play attack humans, she may end being given to a shelter and killed as unadoptable!
post #6 of 12
There is a difference between biting/even when playful and love nips. Not everyone would agree with me on this I guess, but I feel punishing a love nip is teh same as punishing a cat that leaves a mouse at your door. They are expressing love in a feline manner. My husband tried to discourage Autumn from giving him love nips but she always looked so hurt by it. Finally he understood it was her expression of love to him. They are never hard, meerly placing teeth on the skin.

If you are letting her bite you in play then yes that should be stopped as it can get really rough as they get older. They should never see the hand as something to bite. If you want to encourage rough play then get a kitten mit or an interactive feather toy.
post #7 of 12
Quote:
Originally Posted by Enuja View Post
Most cat people, including me, like "lap cats" and don't think it is spoiling a cat at all to let the cat on your lap. Personally, I think it's a privilage to have a cat on my lap. In fact, one of my cats will sleep on my lap and not my husbands', and it is an embarressing inequality in our household.

If your parents are refferring to the fact that you let your cat "nibble" you, though, then you are spoiling your cat in a way that might have very negative consequences for your cat in the future. If you let your cat bite, your cat will continue to bite as it grows up, and you will have trained your cat to be a problem cat. It's even more of a problem with attacking; if you play with your kitten by having her attack and destroy your hand, fingers or arm, she will continue to do so in the future, and you will get very seriously scratched when she is older. Depending on who owns your cat when she gets older and who she scratches, if you train her to play attack humans, she may end being given to a shelter and killed as unadoptable!
I missed the nibbling part. You're right that that behavior should be curbed.
post #8 of 12
Thread Starter 
hi, thanks for the welcome I'm glad i found this site!

I guesss 'nibbles' is a misrepresentation. It's more like the 'love nip' someone described above, just a playful touch of her teeth, more a tickle than anything else. I agree with what everyone has said, i think a lap cat is great, and that's what a domestic pet is all about, animal and human interaction and affection. I think my parents have this odd notion of a semi-"wild" cat, who'll just come for food and run off to an isolated room, and maybe entertain us occasionally it's not as if she's a tiger cub planned for release into the wild (!!), but they insist that I'm making her dependent on people by giving her so much company, and that was what concerned me, even though i really can't see why it'd be a problem.
Anyway my parents have a few odd notions, at least when it comes to the cat. (my dad is convinced that the no cow milk thing is just a huuuge consipiracy with the vets and food manufacturers...)
post #9 of 12
It sounds like you have a great little kitten and you are so lucky to have one that loves to be in your lap. I adopted an older feral kitten and the lap thing hasn't happened - maybe it will, maybe it won't. But be really be careful about the biting. My baby will bite - at first she was SERIOUS about it but now she just nips at me to let me know she has had enough. I have to be alert to her signals.

As for your parents, I am old enough to remember lots of things about cats that turned out not to be true and sometimes even harmful (declawing good, milk good etc.) There is so much more information available to pet owners now and so many more ways to get it. Trust yourself to find the answers for you and your cat and don't let your parents get you down.

And give you kitty a snuggle "hello" from me and my cat Astrid. Good luck!
post #10 of 12
The only way you can spoil a cat is by giving it too much food or food that isn't good for them. As for cow milk, your dad will learn the first time it gives a cat diarhea and the cat tracks it through the house and onto a bed like mine did.. Oh yes and don't encourage scratching or biting.. Other than that, it sounds like you are encouraging a very friendly snuggly kitty.
post #11 of 12
I love to "spoil" my cats. Kittens are similar to human babies. They love to cuddle and be close and held. As they grow they tend to develop their own individual preferences and a cuddler when young might not like to cuddle so much when older... and vice versa.

My Chynna gives "love nips". She doesn't open her mouth and chomp down, but she will "nibble" with her front teeth while we're cuddling. She'll give me nose kisses and then a "nibble" and then proceed to give more nose kisses.

Abby doesn't give "love nibbles". When you feel her teeth it's because she's giving you fair warning of "Ok, that's enough and I mean it!" and only usually does it if I persist on rubbing her tummy or scratching her back after her tail starts twitching... which is her first warning that she's had enough, hehe

It's not wrong to want to cuddle your baby You both enjoy it so what could be wrong with that?
post #12 of 12
Kittens are meant to be spoiled rotten!!!!
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