what would you do?

sydney

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When my boyfriend and I met we each had two cats, we then moved in together and are cats became fast friends.

After a year of living together, my boyfriend and i had discussed getting a Bengal kitten. We both love Bengals and have always wanted one. However we found an ad for two adult Bengals,male and female, they were a breeding pair, but we were NOT going to breed them. However it turned out that the female was already pregnant when we got her. About a month later she had 7 wonderful little babies, that same day we took the male in to get fixed. (Ever since they came into the house the male has been in his own room since he wasnt nuetered, the plan was to introduce him to the house and other cats once he was neutered.)

So a month after his neuter we started letting him out of his room slowly. The other cats hissed and hid from him. He made friends with one of my boyfriends cats. One of my cats just hates him and wont come near him, and the other two dont seem to care either way.

So a coulple days pass and I wake up one moring and I hear a cat fight, i go running into the other room and i find the male Bengal attacking one of my resident cats, there was pee and poop everywhere and hair all over the place.Luckily neither was hurt but it looked nasty. I immediatly put the male Bengal back in his room. I told my boyfriend not to let him out agian. Well the boyfriend didnt listen and he let him out of his room one night when i was sleeping, and he attacked one of my cats.

After I heard this i was so mad, I knew we needed to find the male Bengal a new home, cause these attacks were bad, and it isnt fair to the cats that were there first.

My boyfriend loves this cat and is fighting to keep him. If it wasnt for the fact that he attacked two of our cats, i would be fine with that. But I also dont think it is fair to the male Bengal cause now he is locked up all day everyday in his own room. I dont think thats fair to him, but its not fair to my other cats to let him out and possibly indanger them. My boyfriend and I have been fighting over this cat for a month now.
i think he needs to be rehomed, its the best for all involved.
However i decided to try a comprmise with my boyfriend and told him i would give the cat one more chace, sort of like three strikes and your out.

So we let him out one more time, and he sees one of my cats running off somewhere and he goes into stalking mode and then attack mode. So back in the room he went.

Now I feel bad for my boyfriend cause he really loves this cat, but I dont know how to tell him he needs to go without causing another fight.Also ever since the male bengal has entered the picture, my normally very sweet cat Isabelle had turned into a meany, hissing and swatting at the other cats. I hate that this has affected her personailty.

What would you guys do and how would you go about talking to your "significant Other" about a situation like this?
 

tunaqueen

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Sorry to hear about this, Sydney! I guess if it were me I'd be like you, the other cats were there first and as much as I love the one that can't get along, I'd have to find him another home. He would be much happier too, I imagine.
I understand your boyfriend's feelings but even he must know that his boy isn't happy. Happy cats don't attack each other. And wouldn't he rather have him be a content, well adjusted kitty?
If nothing seems to work, then my only option would be to give up the cat that causes the problem. It's not really "giving up" though, it's more like doing whats right for the cat. To me thats what should be considered more than how much he'll be missed. Do what's right for the kitty. Maybe if you approach the subject this way, your boyfriend will understand? Wishing you the best
 
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