i need everyones advice please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

kittyprincess

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As some of you know I am getting a $1,000 loan for me and my boyfriend mostly for my boyfriend. Oh which i got it today
But I have a question. Now before i ask my question I love my b/f to death and we have a good relationship, but i watch judge mathis. Should I make him sign a contract saying the loan was for him and that he will pay on it monthly just in case something happens? dont think anything happens but there is always that what if..... ya know i dont know what to do.........
 

phenomsmom

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Yes. Just to be on the safe side. My parents loaned me money to buy a car and my dad had me sign saying I would give him 200 a month until I paid it off. So yes just incase something terrible happens and you are out $1000.
 

sarahp

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Definitely. If he's any sort of bf he will understand that you need to cover yourself. That's very kind of you to go into debt for him, but you don't want to get burnt for your kindness.

When my now hubby and I moved in together, I signed a co-habitation agreement that basically said what's his is his and what's mine is mine since he had a substantial investment portfolio, and I would be eligible to claim half of it once we'd lived together for 6 months or something. Of course I wouldn't, but I understood that he'd worked hard to get where he is, and you never know what sort of person would turn spiteful if things go bad.
 
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kittyprincess

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i know he will pay it back i ugh i dont know i just want to be on the safe side i am glad you guys understand tonight when he gets home i will try and have a talk with him if not i will just tell him to look at this thread, lol
 

mirinae

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Yes. It might not be romantic, but better safe than sorry, especially if you got the loan on his behalf because he was unable to get a loan otherwise.
 

rachey

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I would get him to sign something yes, hopefully it wont be needed, but supposing something did happen, you dont want to beleft paying for his loan
 
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kittyprincess

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i was just thinking if he plans on paying back like he said and stuff then he will have no problem with signing something. i just feel like a bad girlfriend if i ask him
 

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Absolutely- and have it notarized. It has nothing to do with "being a bad girlfriend". You took out the loan for him- it is a business arrangement, not a gift, and you need to cover all of your bases and make sure you have that in writing. Have it signed and notarized
.
 

mirinae

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Yeah, but you're not a bad girlfriend, you're a responsible one. $1000 is a lot of money to lend to someone, even if you love that someone very much. Financial issues are the #1 problem to come up between couples, and you're taking a risk that things might not work out and you won't get your money back. Besides that, you already have a loan with your bank; if your boyfriend doesn't pay you back, you can't meet your obligation to your bank, and that's all bad. This isn't just about you and him: it's about you, him, and the financial institution that lent you the money in the first place. I think asking him to sign a contract would be a very mature, responsible and reasonable thing to do.

If he takes issue with you wanting him to sign a contract, well, that kinda says a lot too, doesn't it?
 

satai

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Originally Posted by kittyprincess

i was just thinking if he plans on paying back like he said and stuff then he will have no problem with signing something. i just feel like a bad girlfriend if i ask him
Some people do get upset at the implied lack of trust - not necessarily because they were thwarted in their attempts to rip you off.

Some people would never ask for, or sign, a pre-nup, for example, because it seems to undermine the trust in each other.

He may be like that. He may not. He may be somewhere in the middle. Be sensitive of his feelings, and clear about why you want it.
 
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kittyprincess

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Originally Posted by Mirinae

Yeah, but you're not a bad girlfriend, you're a responsible one. $1000 is a lot of money to lend to someone, even if you love that someone very much. This isn't just about you and him: it's about you, him, and the financial institution that lent you the money in the first place. I think asking him to sign a contract would be a very mature, responsible and reasonable thing to do.

If he takes issue with you wanting him to sign a contract, well, that kinda says a lot too, doesn't it?
I have to agree with you but i dont think he will have a problem. im just gonna let him know that its the responsible and mature thing to do and if he doesnt want to sign the contract then i will just give the money back to the bank.....
 

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Have a simple document ready and when you get the money, hand him the document to sign, and with a smile say, Hon, sign right here and we're all set! If you don't make a big deal of it, he probably won't either.
 

lookingglass

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Originally Posted by kittyprincess

i was just thinking if he plans on paying back like he said and stuff then he will have no problem with signing something. i just feel like a bad girlfriend if i ask him
You aren't a bad girl friend for asking. You are a smart girl friend for asking. As Dr Phil says you teach people how to treat you. You want this debit paid back, and you want to make sure of it. It simply makes sense.
 

fwan

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I would do it, Ive lost 10,000 to my ex and i dont think i will ever see one cent from him again
 
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kittyprincess

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its to late to cosign i already got the loan and have the money in my wallat. he is home now and i think he might be a lil hrumpy im just scared and a lil nervous to ask him
 

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I believe it actually makes everything a lot easier. When you write something out and both parties agree to it by signing it, you both know exactly what you have agreed to. A lot of disputes come from different points of view. It isn't so much about trust as communication.
 

gailc

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Is there a reason he could not get the loan??? After working in finance for 20 yrs I saw alot of loans that were taken out in one persons name but the loan was for the another person. Relationships fall apart the then the person on the loan is stuck with the debt.
What is the intended purchase??? Is he capable of repaying the loan? part of the loan?? I would not spend any of the money until the details are understood about this. You are just starting to establish credit and your don't want to mess it up!!
 
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