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Beating ourselves up..................

post #1 of 20
Thread Starter 
I have read and read, in the forums until I am dizzy. Trying find an answer.

It's been just about 72 hr. since we lost our beloved "Spud". The most beautiful Maine Coon kitty we have ever seen. We had our "woody" gray tabby for 17 healthy years. When she passed in March of this year, we said we could never go through the pain of loosing another love one like that.

Well, it lasted almost a month and we went to the shelter to rescue another kitty. While we were there, we had picked out another Tabby (much different markings of course) there was the most beautiful Maine Coon in the cage next to our new girl. The Coon kept sticking her paws through that cage as if to say, "take me, take me". Well we came home with 2 cats that day, and were so happy again. The tabby had had a URI while she was in the shelter but came home with a clean bill of health and the vet said to keep an eye on it. Over the the nex 4 1/2 months the tabby had a few flare up's and I treated them with lysine and it went right away. Spud (maine coon) never had any signs of contracting the conjunctivitus. A little over a week ago, I noticed her eye was showing signs of the virus so I tried the same treatment-to which she was having no part of-not eating. I took her into the vet and they prescribed oral antibiotics and the Lysine paste. After 2 days of these prescriptions the URI appeared to be gone, but she still wasn't eating. She showed signs of depression, coat was mangy and she had a foul odor about her. I called the Vet and she advised to keep up the meds and keep an eye on her. Spud was still drinking water, but was having a tough time keeping it down. I tried force feeding, that worked the first few times-she didn't vomit. Then she couldn't even keep that down.I got her into the Vet right away and the decided that they should keep her-to which they felt she need ed more antibiotics. The Vet called me later in the day, and said she had an Kidney infection-and I needed to stop by and leave a deposit since she would need to be with them a few days. I stopped by on my way home from work, to leave the $300 they requested. I popped in to check on my baby- this day I will never forget. She was huddled at the back of her cage with an IV in her little paw, and she cried out to me over and over as if begging to come home. I wept openly as the Vet came into talk to me. The original Vet had left due to some emergency, and I spoke with Doctor rubber mouth a what seemed to be a less than concerned party that struggled with the english language-middle eastern. I went away from there feeling so lousy, my wife and I cried and worried all nite. The next morning, I called to check on Spud and Dr. rubber mouth advised me that "she didn't make it through the nite".

We are both so torn up by the passing of Spud, we break into tears throughout the day. Our other cat "Cosmo" Spuds sister seems to know something is amiss.

I have read about Coon's and Kidney problems
I have read about Kidney problems and Antibiotics
I have read about Vet misdiagnosis

Could the meds have brought on the Kidney problem's?
Was she misdiagnosed?

She was so young, and all I have read about the kidney problems refer's to older cats.

We just keep beating ourselve's up as to what or how we could have prevented the loss of our beautiful less than a year old baby?

We have adopted another kitty that comes home tommorrow, that we hope will cheer all of us up a bit-myself/wife and Cosmo. Spud cannot be replaced, but she would have wanted us to save another kitty's life at the shelter.

But when will the pain subside? This really seems harder than human losses I have had in my life. Is this wrong?

Godspeed, our Spud!
post #2 of 20
Im so very sorry for your loss of Spud. I can feel your pain. May Spud rest in peace over the rainbow with no sickness until you see her again.
post #3 of 20
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by Pami View Post
Im so very sorry for your loss of Spud. I can feel your pain. May Spud rest in peace over the rainbow with no sickness until you see her again.
Thank you, Pam

I wanted to share, just how beautiful the "spud" is. I say is, because even though she is not with us physically-she will forever be in our hearts. Truly a "one of a kind" cat. We felt that we were so lucky to have rescued such a beautiful cat from the shelter, that was to be euthanized the next day.
Our pretty girl-
post #4 of 20
She is so beautiful with soulful eyes. She was lucky to have you, too. She knows you did what you could for her, Im sure. And thats really all that we can do. What a sweet baby girl.
post #5 of 20
RIP little kitty.

There is no reason to beat yourself up, you did all that you could to help.

I do have a question, i have never seen a vet ask for money when you drop off a pet.
is this normal?
post #6 of 20
I'm so sorry for your loss. Spud was a truly beautiful cat. I know your time with her was too short, but hope you can find comfort in knowing that because of you she knew so much love. RIP Spud.
post #7 of 20
Originally Posted by vorra65 View Post
But when will the pain subside? This really seems harder than human losses I have had in my life. Is this wrong?

Godspeed, our Spud!
No, it isn't wrong. It's just the way it is sometimes.

I am so sorry for you painful loss.

I don't know when the pain will subside - I think maybe it never does, we just learn to live with it better, to soldier on. Adopting another kitty is a beautiful tribute to Spud.

No matter how long or short their lives, you have saved them from spending it in a cage.

Rest in peace Spud. Look down on your family at this sad time.
post #8 of 20
What a lovely kitty! I am very sorry she passed away, and how difficult to have so many questions. Maybe you can call your regular vet back and let them know of your questions and worries. That vet saw Spud, and should be able to review her chart and let you know a little more information.

Often there is just no good answer. Just know that you did all you could to save Spud. And remember she is at peace now.
post #9 of 20
I am so sorry to hear this, I think maybe ringing the vet and trying to get some answers may help you through this. And hopefully the new comer will help everyone to get through this. RIP spud, lucky to have such a wonderful owner, for however short a time.
post #10 of 20
Bless her little heart she's gorgeous And i like how you say "is" instead of "was"

Please don't beat yourself up, you did everything you could by taking Spud to the vet to get some help.

Rest assured that Spud is well over the bridge now and she was met by all the other TCS kitties who have passed You will see Spud again one day, but right now she's having fun over at her new home.

post #11 of 20
Spud was absolutely beautiful, you did the best you could do, she knows that. Cats don't look at death the way we do they aren't afraid to die. My Bella is sick right now with cancer and I feel guilty and we have done everything humanly possible to save her and she's not going to get better. It's only natural to feel the guilt and the loss is overwhelming, we don't get over it we learn to live with it and find a new normal. They live on forever in our hearts, I hope you will find comfort in your memories of Spud.
post #12 of 20
Condolences on your loss of Spud. Your courage to adopt another cat as a tribute to Spud is very noble. Spud will be looking down from RB with pride. And maybe Cosmo will find a diversion from missing Spud. May your whole family be blessed with comfort and healing very soon.
post #13 of 20
I'm so very sorry about Spud. I do agree with the others; I'd call my regular vet & try to get some answers.
[quote]She was so young, and all I have read about the kidney problems refer's to older cats. [/QUOTE

Unfortunately, kidney problems don't recognize a cat's age. We lost our beloved Belle last Nov. to CRF, and she was only 6 y/o. The vet said it could have been congenital or she could have gotten into anti-freeze before we rescued her.

You did the best you could for your baby; I hope you can find some peace soon.
post #14 of 20
I'm so sorry to hear about Spud. She was a real sweetie. It hurts like crazy, doesn't it? and it will for a while, who can say how long?

Something someone said in one of these sad threads a while ago, likening the loss to a huge hole that right now you keep falling into -- and as time passes, you learn the shape and dimensions of the hole, so that you can move around it without falling in. The hole never really goes away, but you learn to live in its presence. I've found that to be a useful image -- perhaps you will too.

Spud knows you did everything you could for her, and she's glad you're taking a new little person into your lives. Please be gentle with yourselves.

RIP sweet Spud
post #15 of 20
The pain may not go away for awhile, but one day, you'll find that when you think of her, you'll smile instead of feeling sad. Gradually, this will happen more and more.
post #16 of 20
I'm sorry to hear about your kitty Spud. RIP.
post #17 of 20
I am really sorry about Spud. I'm so sorry you had to lose her. No, it's not your fault at all. Please don't blame yourself! It's not wrong to feel more pain with losing a pet than a human. It happens and I totally understand that feeling. RIP Spud.
post #18 of 20
Thread Starter 
I want to thank each and every one of you, with your warm wishes and condolence's. We miss our Spuddy every day, and the tears seem to only well in the eye as opposed to running down the cheek. I have considered the advice of some, to talk to the vet attempting to find out more. I have decicded to not give this a go. For one, it won't bring our sweet kitty back-and Two, if I find out that the Vet had a hand in Spud's demise- I may lose it. Spud will forever be in our hearts and memories, it's just so sad that she couldn't be with us longer-she was like no other kitty I had ever been around-a real smooch bug.

On a lighter note, today marks one week that I brought home a companion for Spuds sister-Cosmo. Our new little kitty is "Toonz", and is a bit younger than Cosmo. She ran under the "tiger Lilly" name at the shelter, and I decided she looked more like a "Toonz" that would drive the car if you needed her to. It took a few days of allowing each other a wide berth, but when I left for work this A.M. they were chasing each other around the house and playing as cats should. I'm so glad, as it is quite obvious that Cosmo aged with the passing of her sister. We have been very attentive to give both kittys the same amount of attention. Toonz, appears to have some Ab and maybe a little Siamese (tail) in her-with a little Bengal thrown in for good measure. Whatever she is, we love her very much already, since she is very affectionate like our Spud was. As you can see, she carries some of the colors that Spud had. Sometime 's when they sit next to each other I could swear I see the "Spud".

Thanks again to all, and I hope all your buddies stay healthy so you can enjoy each others company for many many years to come.

post #19 of 20
She is lovely, and I am glad that she is helping you and Cosmo.
post #20 of 20
Originally Posted by vorra65 View Post
I just love her little white boots!
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