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needing to vent

post #1 of 12
Thread Starter 
I just need to vent because I have no one who will listen It's about my dad: he never listens to what I have to say on the phone. He cuts me off, doesn't listen to what I have to say, is always serious, blah blah blah blah blah! I absolutely hate talking to him anymore...... It's sad/mean to say, but that is how I feel. Half the time I end up swearing under my breath, because he's so irritating. I'd tell my mom, but that would probably start another feud. I have absolutely no desire to see them....
post #2 of 12
Tigger, I am sorry you feel that way. I can relate in my own way since my dad is famous for cutting people off and talking endlessly. When I lived with him we hardly ever talked because he got on my nerves so. Anytime I had a problem he would always have something to say about it and it always irritated me.

When he would have friends over he would try and get strict in front of them and act like a real jerk. I'd roll my eyes and call him on it then walk away.

Things started to get better when I stayed at Brian's house most of the time and now that I don't live with my father anymore we get along great. In fact I actually like to listen to his adivce now!!

I know that you don't live with your dad so moving out isn't an option. I would suggest telling him how this bothers you so but if he's anything like my dad it won't help. I'm not sure how close your relationship is with your dad but maybe you need time apart??

Don't have any good advice other than I feel your frustration.
post #3 of 12
I can so relate, you're not alone (if that makes you feel any better). I have 4 people who are like that: my parents and parents-in-law .

Solution: I moved to another country away from my parents (LOL, just kidding, I moved but not because of that!) and we're not on speaking terms with parents-in-law.

And isn't it annoying when others know your things better than you do and knows and tells you what you are supposed to do???

Ok, sorry, wasn't my thread, didn't mean to start venting like this....
post #4 of 12
Thread Starter 
I dont think it would help, as that is how he is. He sounds just like your dad I wouldnt say my dad is negative, it's just that if I try to tell him anything, he just well.... you probably know what I'm trying to spit out of my mouth!
It was just like before we bought our Lexus last year..... he didnt think we needed such an expensive car.....
post #5 of 12
Thread Starter 

Hey, go ahead and vent, too! In fact, let's make this a thread about venting about parents! It will make us all feel better, LOL. I've got the chocolate cake ......
post #6 of 12
I used to have this sort of problem with my dad when I was a teenager. He ALWAYS thought that he knew what was best, even though most of the time it wasn't. He talked a lot of crap and finally I just stopped talking to him or seeing him whenever I was home. Thankfully, I started to live with my then boyfriend/fiance (now hubby) and I guess he just gave up trying to tell me what to do. I can tolerate him now and I talk to him whenever I see him. So, I guess that moving out does help in some cases.
post #7 of 12
I'm sorry to hear your troubles Tigger!
I have the problem of my mom being very critical of everything I do, who I am friends with, and all that good stuff. My solution, ignore her if she does this. She lives in Texas and I live In Iowa so I am not as offended if she doesn't like what I do and don't do, who I am with (but she actually likes my S/O suprise and shock)my job etc. I think of it as this: I am an adult and i can do as I please and if she doesn't like it then she doesn't have to be here to watch it. She IS coming out in Sept and that is causing me alot of grief because the closer she is, the more friction there is. The hardest part is, that noone else sees this because she is very polite in person, but when we are alone, she is like Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. Ok, now I too have not givenyou any advice, I just added to the venting. anyone want some liquor to go with the chocolate cake? LOL!
post #8 of 12
Tigger - I am sorry that you have a difficult relationship with your father. Why is it the father's of a certain generation always think they are lord of all the survey. My dad and I are finally getting to have a better relationship. About 2 years ago I had a drag out fight with my dad (on the way to church) and I cried all thruogh church. I finally told him that either he could respect me and my hubby or he could see a lot less of me, because I was not going to have him trying to make all of the decisions in our lives. I think my mom lectured him when they got home and he has been better (with flashes of his old self) since then.
post #9 of 12
Thread Starter 
I think that it also depends on how a child is raised..... I could be wrong, though. His mother (my grandmother) is very similar to him, so he could have very well gotten it from her! I told him the other day he doesnt need to be so damned serious about everything, and he turned it right around on me, which I'm sorry, but I am not serious like him...... That is another thing that irritates me: when parents say crap like that to their kids, like how they are rude, go back to things they did when they were younger. Oh well Thanks for listening!
post #10 of 12
You say we can vent about our parents? Well how about this? My mother is such a ----- that I didn't speak to her for 5 years. After she moved it got easier, and we can talk now, but when it comes to how I raise my daughter, she thinks she has all the answers because she raised 5 kids. My kid is nothing like we were as kids, she respects us and will talk to me about everything. So how can my mother know what is best for mine? That really irks me off!
I only talk to her about once a month, and she can't afford to call me, so thank God for small favors!
Thanks for the vent space!
post #11 of 12
My Dad and I used to have a rough relationship, too. After my mom passed away, we both worked a lot harder on it, and I'm lucky to say that today, my Dad is my best friend.

However, he still does show flashes of his past behavior, too. Luckily, now I can tell him when what he says or does hurts me, and he actually listens. Sometimes he won't change his mind, but at least he's aware of it.
post #12 of 12
Thread Starter 
Sorry to hear that about your mom!
I know that when we have kids, hubby and I will raise them so they can talk to us about whatever they want..... I want them to be able to come to me and him. When I was growing up, I always went to my grandmother for advice on boys, etc My mother never really taught me anything that girl's go thru, either..... When I was in the 5th grade, I started shaving my legs without telling her, and she was upset when she found out She thought my friends had persuaded me to........ I had started shaving because I was made fun of because of my hairy legs.... I have dark hair, so it was much more noticeable than girls with lighter colored hair. You would have thought she would have understood, but I guess she didn't. Tigger2, I'm glad you were able to vent!

Anyone else need to get something off of their chests?
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