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Attitude

post #1 of 18
Thread Starter 
Ever since we've brought Davidson home, Harley has been acting a bit different. He's not as playful with me and John, but he loves to play with Davidson of course, they are always off doing something causing trouble

He just seems like he has more attitude with us, more so than normal. He's always been like that, but it just seems like its escalated. He's not mean or anything towards us, still very loving, only on his terms. Maybe distant is a better word. He still purrs and enjoys his kisses and scratches from me, but thats about it.

Could this be from bringing Davidson home? I just want to make sure my big lovebug is happy. I spoil him rotton, treats - food - everything, and I give him TONS of attention. As much as he'll stand anyways.

As anyone else experienced this before? I just want to make sure he still knows that he's loved
post #2 of 18
I think he's happy - I think he's probably just meeting most his cuddle needs with Davidson.

I don't think he resents you for bring Davidson home (and please don't be jealous of his affection for Davidson) but I think he's probably just more a cat's cat than a people cat.
post #3 of 18
It's tough on cats when a new addition comes home. By giving Harley lots of attention you are showing him he's no less important. I'm sure he'll come around when he fully adjusts.
post #4 of 18
And here I thought we were the only ones.
Blaze will not come to me now.Neela will come for lovings ONLY when she wants them.They both play with Corwin and groom him.They act like they are his Meowmy.I just let them go.But, it was kind of a heart break for me to go from Blaze and Neela being by my side for the most part, to NOTHING from Blaze and little from Neela.Oh, you open a bag of food and all of a sudden you're their best friend though.
I've started letting Blaze and Neela have some "down" time.I have been letting them sunbathe on our deck and steps ONLY while I am standing/sitting with them.They are out there for about 15 mintues and they love it.I do this about 2 times a week, just so they know I still love them.
I am almost affraid to see what will happen once I let the kits out.
post #5 of 18
I remember that Susan (rosiemac) has posted about this.. Apparently Rosie wasn't too happy at first about Sophie. She may have some ideas for you.
We brought Rocky home when Zakk was about 10 months. I think he may have lost some of his initial affection, but also he was growing and maturing and maybe getting a little more independent anyway, which may be what is going on with Harley. He also may be replacing some of his companionship needs with Davidson, but don't you worry, you have a special place in his heart and he knows it. Zakk still has "nightly purry snuggle time" with hubby and sometimes me, but other than that he is a very independent kitty who only shows his needs in the food department. Maybe if you thought about it this way... say it was you and your only child.. a 6 year old. Then suddenly you got him a 4 year old brother who thinks he is great and follows him around and plays with him and even speaks the same special language.. he's probably not gonna spend as much time with you, but he still needs you.
post #6 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by Satai
I think he's happy - I think he's probably just meeting most his cuddle needs with Davidson.

I don't think he resents you for bring Davidson home (and please don't be jealous of his affection for Davidson) but I think he's probably just more a cat's cat than a people cat.
Pixel is a cat's cat. she wants to be near me, but not on me like Chip. she enjoys snuggling with Cable, like she did with Mouse. Mouse liked to sit with me much more than Pixel. Java doesn't sit with me at all - but meets me at the door when i come home for a kiss without fail they're all different, but all lovable. i think Harley's just enjoying being the 'big brother'!
post #7 of 18
Thread Starter 
Thanks everyone for your help and suggestions
I just worry about my big 'ol guy!

Davidson is so opposite, he loves to cuddle, and lay on my lap whenever I'm sitting down - I guess Harley is just a cat's cat!
post #8 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by babyharley
Thanks everyone for your help and suggestions
I just worry about my big 'ol guy!

Davidson is so opposite, he loves to cuddle, and lay on my lap whenever I'm sitting down - I guess Harley is just a cat's cat!
That's one thing I have noticed now that I have 5 cats...each one is so different! Twitch is a cat's cat...Lily is MY cat, Ophelia is an interesting(it's the only word that can describe her) cat, while Damita & Chico are lap cats.

It may not even have anything to do with Davidson. Twitch doesn't come to me for as much attention now that I have Lily, & Lily doesn't come to me for as much attention when Twitch is awake & playing with her all day.
post #9 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by zak&rocky
I remember that Susan (rosiemac) has posted about this.. Apparently Rosie wasn't too happy at first about Sophie. She may have some ideas for you.
Oh was she not! Rosie stayed up in her room most of the time, even though she bonded with Sophie

She stopped coming on my lap, didn't want to play with me like she used to, and we always played peekaboo on the stairs, and she stopped giving me headbutts

It was a year before i got my little girl back to the way she used to be, but it was well worth the wait.

Just keep giving Harley attention and spend some quality time with him to tell him how much you love him etc... and he will come round, but the main thing is that he and Davidson get along which we all know they do
post #10 of 18
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by rosiemac
Oh was she not! Rosie stayed up in her room most of the time, even though she bonded with Sophie

She stopped coming on my lap, didn't want to play with me like she used to, and we always played peekaboo on the stairs, and she stopped giving me headbutts

It was a year before i got my little girl back to the way she used to be, but it was well worth the wait.

Just keep giving Harley attention and spend some quality time with him to tell him how much you love him etc... and he will come round, but the main thing is that he and Davidson get along which we all know they do
Sounds just like Harley. He's not playful with me at all anymore, which made me feel horrible - like I did something wrong

He's getting a bit better, but for awhile there, he didn't want anything to do with anyone - except Davidson!
post #11 of 18
When the novelty of the kitten wears off, I'm sure he'll be back to his old self!

(Now I'm wondering what else I should worry about when bringing home a new furbaby...)
post #12 of 18
When I first got Polly, Prego was that way for awhile. He wouldn't even sleep with us on the bed. I was really sad for awhile, but after a couple months, he got used to having Polly around, and he's back to his old self.

I think Harley will come around. He's just getting used to the new addition.
post #13 of 18
The same thing happened with our Max when we brought Speedboat into the house. They bonded with each other. Max quit doing a lot of the fun things he did before. It definitely made him more independent. So I think it is natural for that to happen.
post #14 of 18
Marlee is doing this a little bit, but not much luckily! The first day or so she didn't want me to pet her, she would let me touch her, but then run away. Now if she is in the mood, she will let me pet her as long as nothing more exciting is happening. She doesn't stay in the bed all night with me like she did before Milo came home, but before I go to sleep she does come lay with me for a minute, then comes back and visits again in the morning. I guess she must be off playing with Milo during the night. All in all, I think things are going well, and will hopefully continue getting better!
post #15 of 18
Well, Fergus actually likes my kitten (Captain Steuben)...I brought Steuben home at 7 weeks, and the little squirt is now 5 months. Ripley (my female) still doesn't like the idea of Steuben...and Steub generally tortures her. He pounces on her when she's trying to take a beauty rest, butts her out of the way to grab a nibble of her food, jumps on her back and wraps his front paws around her neck and bites her...

Ripley has been a bit different since bringing Steuben home. She's more avoidant of me and less chatty...she's always been a talker. I just make sure that I'm treating her like she's the queen of my heart as usual, and I do feel confident that she'll adjust, especially when Steuben calms down and matures a bit more. Sometimes when she's getting picked on by Steuben, she gives me this look like, "Meowmy, DO SOMETHING!!! I can't take this torture!!!"
post #16 of 18
I experienced a similar thing with Gizmo when I brought Tinkerbelle home. For about a week after we first got her, Gizmo was a little distant..not angry but acting 'hurt'..like he was upset that he was not enough cat for us (sensitive old soul). Not agressive, but sad. He started to form a close bond with Tinkerbelle...very cute to watch but we were missing our old affectionate Gizmo.

As soon as we realised this, we went into overdrive with 'making Gizmo feel loved and number 1'...and soon he was back to his old lovable self, all over us....but still all over Tinkerbelle too! He has the best of both worlds!
post #17 of 18
I also experienced a change in behavior with Kabou when I adopted Brandon. Kabou had to be where I was at all times, required lots of play time with me as well as lots of loving. Boy, did that change in a hurry. All her attention was turned on Brandon and quite honestly, I missed her so much. I wondered just like you if she was happy and if I had done the right thing.

It has now been four and a half months since Brandon joined us, and I am happy to say she is slowly returning to her pre-Brandon self. She still doesn't play that much with me (She has Brandon for that), but she comes for her loving and special times with me. It just takes time.
post #18 of 18
Emily has been more distant since we brought home Chessy almost 2 months ago. I know she is probably still adjusting, but it is hard. Chessy more than makes up for Emily's lack of affection though.
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