Rudeness: The New Norm?

I hate it when people invade my personal space. Nobody but my SO needs to breathe down my neck, or even worse, screeching into a cell phone while breathing down my neck. I guess loud, foul languge is not considered rude any more, either. I hear so many people around here that cannot string a sentence together without using the "F" word 5 or 6 times. I am not easily offended, but that is just ridiculous!

Because of the prevalence of chemicals in the environment, more and more people born today are born with autistic tendencies.

It could be purely biological.

Yes, What Sheng Mei is trying to say is that alot of people with Autistic tendencies do not understand basic communication rules (ie: interrupting) and don't understand the meaning of personal space. My daughter will interrupt people who are speaking. She doesn't understand that they aren't finished. And she will get right in your face to talk to you....as in breathing in your air. It can be frustrating. And also, the prevalence of Autism has increased in the last few years.....and is predicted to continue to rise. And autism comes in many forms, PDDs, High Functioning, Asperger's to name a few.

And that may be some of the people you are running into on day to day living, there may be many people out there that have Asperger's (esp) and don't even know it. It wasn't highly diagnosed a few years ago. And those people were simply thought of as socially inept or awkward.

I work with a couple who i've heard cut other employees off in mid sentence and their not autistic, far from it infact, i call it ignorance.

I agree! IMO everyone tries to come up with a medical reason for everything. Not saying that there isn't a rise in autism, but a medical diagnosis for everything isn't the answer.

Yes I encounter tons of rude people all day everyday. Most of it is in stores and on the road. Everyone seems to think that they are more important than everyone else. Instead of letting someone go in front of them the try to cut in lines, or zoom past them in the slow lane even though there is a line of cars in front of them going slow too. Or people moving your stuff while you are standing there without even saying excuse me or anything. I am really getting sick of it.

Confirmation that this is the "Me Generation". I cannot stand ignorant, rude people and I agree that trying to put fancy medical names on it doesn't cut it with me. Rude and ignorant is just plain rude and ignorant.

When folks use foul language around me (and I'm no prude so it has to be pretty bad for me to react), I simply turn to them and ask them if they also eat with that mouth.

When I hold a door for someone and they neglect to say thank you, I simply say (in a little louder than usual voice), You're welcome.

I've done that! I have to make a conscious effort to say please and thank you at every opportunity, and hold doors for people, etc just because I am a bit scatter-brained, I kinda walk around in my own world but I also KNOW that I do this, so therefore I double my efforts so I don't appear rude. I think most other people just don't care

I agree that there are a TON of rude people out there. I get interrupted many many times every day on the phone at work. But I think we can't always assume the worst of everyone. Sometimes people do have medical conditions that we don't know about, and sometimes people are just stuck in their own world and forget to be polite.

If someone is rude to me, I try to figure out if it's intentional first. Most of the time it is though.

I see the most rudeness when I am shopping at Wal-Mart. People will stand in the aisle and chat for 15 minutes when it is obvious you are waiting to get around them. I have personally put in a request to Wal-Mart to widen the aisles (I know a store layout person ). Also, when you are standing in line people will come up right behind you practically hitting you in the rear with their carts.

Foul language doesn't generally bother me unless I am with my kids. Luckily (or unfortunately) my daughter can recognize, but does not repeat bad words. She will tell strangers as well as mommy or daddy when we slip, "You shouldn't say that word, its not nice!) I think that effectively puts people in their place, being admonished by a 3 year old!

I am old enough (52) to think that the past couple of generations are not being taught proper manners and respect for others. Not to say that elders never annoy me, but usually it is a younger type.
"In my day" there was a time and a place. We curse amongst ourselves and friends and family to be sure, but never ever within earshot of a child, or an older person, or frankly- someone we did not know.

I was taught to hold a door open for whomever was behind me too. I had to (and still do) hold doors open for my Mother regardless of the situation. She would stand quietly outside a door forever if one of us forgot to open it for her. It just was not done.

I still M'am and Sir all of my clients whether they are older or younger than me.
If I am supposed to be somewhere at noon I am there at five til.

And so on...

Not to sound like too much of an old codger, but I believe that many people focus too much on the reactions their words and actions will receive- everybody wants to be a comedian. You try to get the first snark in, the first rude analogy, the first laugh.
And don't get me started on cellphones. On of the ladies I work with talks on a cellphone nearly all day long, and in Portugese to bat. To my way of being raised that is rude on two counts. You excuse yourself to take a phone call, not subject everyone in the room to your chatter. I can kinda sorta excuse the non-English aspect, but to hear it day after day all day makes me feel as if I am working in Brazil. I'm working on accepting it.

Life has become a free for all. No one remembers to "walk a mile in my shoes", or "never judge a book by it's cover". It's a shame. Life is so much more pleasant when folks just try and be aware of what type of effect their behavior has on other people. That does not mean not being true to yourself, or not being honest in your emotions. It just means being considerate.

That same basic thing happened to me last night. He didn't say "Hello, did I LOOK like I was done talking?!" but he did inturrupt and when I tried to get back into the conversation, he just kept talking over me. This is a guy who prides himself on being cultured and refined. HA! Guess not!

LOL, I completely understand, one of my things is the friendly wave. If I let you in traffic I expect the friendly thank you wave dang it!!!

Umm...then 9 out of every 10 people I meet have this.

I believe what Yosemite says...this is the generation of "Me". We've seen the generations that demanded equality, civil rights, then the materialistic generation, the Net gen and now the Me gen. We're so focused today on discovering who we are that we forget about other people.

For example, a child that may be somewhat socialy isolated at school may turn to the net to meet people and have someone to talk with. But because the net is so different from human interaction, that child may not understand the need to wait their turn.

Plus I think that many parents are so apted about bringing their children up with whatever they want, compared to their own childhood where they didn't get that particular toy and still have issues over it, that children are now being brought up with expectations. "I can get whatever I want and I expect things from you" is the attitude.

I personally am younger than the "me" generation and I think that both people older and people younger are generally more polite. People my age hold doors for each other, say thank you, chew with their mouths closed, apologize for interrupting on accident, etc. I don't understand why people think we're impolite because I know I'm not, and none of my friends are either. When someone gives you a ride you say thank you every time, etc. My friends parents often comment on how polite I am, but really everyone I know is the same way. In my high school if you even tried making fun of anyone else nobody who heard you would ever talk to you again, you just didn't make fun of people for anything. As for cursing, there is nothing inherently wrong with any word, so it doesn't bother me, but I don't do it within earshot of children or people who look like they might be offended.

My personal pet peeve:
People in cars who act like they are more important than a person walking. I'm sorry, but we are both one person, I waited my turn to cross the street in the crosswalk, and just because you are in a big, polluting hunk of metal does not make whatever you are doing more important! Really, people will almost run you over because of some ridiculous mindset that one person in a car should take precedence over one person walking. Why? I understand when it's frustrating if someone just walks across through traffic, but when you're in the crosswalk and have the light, it's your turn.

One time someone ran over my mom's heel one too many times in the checkout line at the grocery, and she turned around and flipped out. It was hilarious, my mom is like me and very non-confrontational, but her ankle by that point was bleeding and the woman was oblivious. She was crying by the time my mom was done yelling at her.

I also hate those people who don't even look before crossing the road or parking lot when there is not light or anything. I don't mind stopping for you to cross the road or parking lot. But atleast stop and look both ways befoer just expecting everyone to stop for YOU!

[quote=Zissou'sMom]I personally am younger than the "me" generation and I think that both people older and people younger are generally more polite. People my age hold doors for each other, say thank you, chew with their mouths closed, apologize for interrupting on accident, etc. I don't understand why people think we're impolite because I know I'm not, and none of my friends are either. When someone gives you a ride you say thank you every time, etc. My friends parents often comment on how polite I am, but really everyone I know is the same way. In my high school if you even tried making fun of anyone else nobody who heard you would ever talk to you again, you just didn't make fun of people for anything. As for cursing, there is nothing inherently wrong with any word, so it doesn't bother me, but I don't do it within earshot of children or people who look like they might be offended.
QUOTE]

My younger brother is in high school too (he's just starting), and I just wanted to comment that him and all of his friends are very polite. I hope that trend continues!

Don't even get me started on drivers...especially those that pay the $40K for the car and think that everyone else can get out of their way.

To put in plain text, I've been fed up with other drivers to the point that I was ready to crash my vehicle just so I wouldn't have to drive for a week or two.

Have you ever watched that movie Anger management? Breathe!!! and say "Goose-frabba!"

I love when they're singing "I feel pretty" stopped on the bridge!

I get a TON of rudeness everyday at work. I answer the telephone for the firm when someone is too lazy to dial the phone directory by name or doesn't know the last name, and constantly I get rudeness. I get at least 40 wrong #'s a day, and instead of just saying "oh, I'm sorry I have the wrong #" they hang up on me, then call back again, in which I have to say the whole intro over again, and they hang up again. It's hard to be positive when you get hung up on 40 times a day. Then they are rude when they say: "well I pressed in the ext #" and I say did you press 1 st? "no" well you have to press 1 1st. "Well it doesn't say that" Then I say "actually it says if you know your parties ext please press 1, then you can enter the ext, but I can transfer you from here" and they try to argue with me that it doesn't say that.

Also, here in the city, we have the ped cross walk problem. It goes both ways, when I am driving toward the green light, people will start to walk into the st. and I have to slam on the brake, then they stop, and I had the green light. Or, drivers will try to make a left turn fast to catch the green, and a person will be crossing correctly, but the car will blow through the intersection. And in front of my bldg, I've seen 3 people get hit since last July. Oh, and they love to not let you over when you have your turn signal on... Hello?! Don't you see the giant flashing light on the back of my car??? Keep speeding up so I get run off the road!

No..I've been meaning to see it too...
Actually if I get some free time tonight I pop in the movie "Freeway" with Reese Witherspoon. It's a lot of swearing, but I always feel so relaxed after the movie because she does all my venting for me

I think I'll do that when I'm stuck in traffic on my way home...WITH the windows DOWN!

I must add that I when I said that some of that are rude may have autistic like characteristics, I wasn't make that excuse for everyone. In this area especially well a bit further into DC you can find some of the rudest most arogant people on this planet.

It depends on the person and area of the country. The north east tends to be more grumpy, and the south tends to be more cheerful. If someone is being rude to me, I just walk away. It's better then getting nasty back.

And the people in Los Angeles just tend to be RUDE and very ME oriented. If you want to see the worst the country has to offer, just come to L.A.

Not that I don't doubt you, but I Remember being on a support line for a national company a year ago. The tekkie guy asked me if I was really from Michigan. I said "Yea, why?"
He told me that of all the people he has ever had to talk to on the phone the rudest were people from New York and Michigan. He also said that I was the nicest people he ever spoke with from Michigan.

Of course this is just one guy's personal poll, but I could see where he thought Michigan people were rude...many people I have encountered are very directive "You need to do this ...for me" People of all sorts of ages have the "Me" factor here.

My family is Southern and my pops is a retired Marine. "Please", "thank you", "ma'am" and "sir" were some of the first words, that we kids learned.

I work in a call center and most of the younger employees had to be taught rudimentary courtesy, before they could be put on the phones. On several occasions, I have observed supervisors asking employees to clean up their language, out on the smoking patio.

Kudos, to my DIL: from the time that they started talking, Sam taught the twins to say "thank you" whenever they are given something. At the end of their birthday party, this year, they handed each guest a little candy basket and said, "Thank you for coming."