I really need advise....

Well alot of people have posted and I thank you all. I've come to realize I deserve more. long before I posted. and I actually was more worried about where he was gonna go.....what I was gonna do about paying rent and bills. how I was gonna make it without him... But honestly I decieded I don't care to worry about any of that right now. It's time to start worrying about my well-being. About how I feel and if it means I HAVE TO move back in with my mom... atleast I will be happy.
As for counsling... we are pretty poor already. and he needs more then that....




Oh btw I broke-up with him about an hour ago... and he didn't seem to care really.....

Originally Posted by JavannaLynn

Well alot of people have posted and I thank you all. I've come to realize I deserve more. long before I posted. and I actually was more worried about where he was gonna go.....what I was gonna do about paying rent and bills. how I was gonna make it without him... But honestly I decieded I don't care to worry about any of that right now. It's time to start worrying about my well-being. About how I feel and if it means I HAVE TO move back in with my mom... atleast I will be happy.
As for counsling... we are pretty poor already. and he needs more then that....




Oh btw I broke-up with him about an hour ago... and he didn't seem to care really.....

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That's great that you had the courage to do what is right for you. I'm sure the money issues will be resolved soon and your life will be better than ever.

Good luck!

I'm sorry I didn't see this until now. You were right to break up with him, and his reaction solidifies that. You'll make it through financially - somehow, some way, you'll make it. You're a strong woman, I can see that in your posts. You DO deserve more than that in a relationship - that's not even how roommates treat each other, let along someone who is supposed to love you. Just keep moving forward and don't look back.

Originally Posted by JavannaLynn

Oh btw I broke-up with him about an hour ago... and he didn't seem to care really.....

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Dude. That was cold. If I tell hubby I want a divorce he would off himself.

Man. What a jerk!!!!!

Originally Posted by shengmei

Dude. That was cold. If I tell hubby I want a divorce he would off himself.

Man. What a jerk!!!!!

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I agree. If I told hubby I want a divorce he'd go nuts in a heartbeat.

Hun, that reaction of his is enough of an answer about whether you did the right thing or not. And I say, Go Girl! You did the right thing!!!!

My hubby is scary on this subject. He simply looks at me and says I will never leave you...
Its romantic..but could be creepy!
He didn't love you.
Time to find the love you deserve.

You've done the right thing breaking up with this loser and when you meet a man who loves you and tells you everyday that he does, and that you're the most beautiful woman in the world then you will kick yourself for even wasting 2 years with that guy.
Good luck to you

Oh sweety, I'm sorry you're going through this. It's definately not easy to have these doubts about a relationship. I just ended my 3 year relationship because I didn't feel it was right.

I encourage you to look into the future and try and imagine you marrying this guy. Can you picture that? If you can't, then really there is no point staying with him.

When you say you can't stand him anymore, it kinda seems like you've answered your own question, and you know what needs to be done here.

A true gentleman will help his lady with the housework, and only look at questionable material when she is no where around! And all men look at porn, but it is the normal ones that do it when your not around..They can't help themselves, they are perverts.

I know this is very hard for you as it is weird to think of being on your own after living with someone you love, but you HAVE to do what's best for you, or you will just grow more and more bitter and that's not good for you.

I'm glad you broke up with him, you are right you deserve way better

Hun, we are in the same boat, let me know if you ever need to talk.

Good on you girl!!, you deserve better!

I wish you all the happiness in the world, and I'm sure that you will find a wonderful man someday soon that shows you what a real man is.

It sounds like you got out in time. It would be a shame to look back 20 years from now and realize you had settled, and wasted the best years of your life on someone that does not care. All relationships have their ups and downs, but there is no reason for you to be completely unhappy while he does whatever he wants. If he is still doing that at 27, it is not going to get any better.
I have been happily unmarried to a great guy for 21 years, and we have even been through the constant gaming, (him playing from the time he opened his eyes until he absolutely had to get up and go to work) and I thought I was going to lose my mind. I finally got across how much it upset me, and he keeps it to a reasonable amount now. We are in kind of a rocky patch right now, but he is good enough for me to want to work through problems with him. Leaving has not even been a real consideration. Most of our time together has been good, and I feel very lucky to have him. I still sit down about once a year, and review the relationship to make sure this is still what I want. I figure as long as I am still glad to see him every morning when I open my eyes, we are still good. He adores the kitties as much as I do, and that has been a big plus, too.
You should not have any less in a relationship. You deserve someone that will treat you well, stand with you in good and bad times, and not take you for granted. There are good men out there, sometimes in the places you least expect it.
I know this is a rough time for you. Breaking up, even from a bad relationship, is a huge upheaval in your life. I advise some "you" time. Read some good books, take some long walks, hang out with the kitties, pamper yourself as much as time and finances permit. Hang in there, honey! It will be ok.

*many hugs and much support*

It's easy for us to say that you did the right thing, and I truly believe that you'll think so, too... but it's still hard to step up and do what needs to be done. Good on you!

I know what you're going through, about 12 months ago I was in an almost identical situation to this. I finally came to the point where it was my happiness or him. With the help of my family and friends I came to realise I was more important and deserved to be happy, not someones door mat.

I have now moved forward, have just recently met a wonderful guy (I am being very cautious and taking things very slow) and couldn't be happier. He is now nothing but a distant memory to me.

I wish you all the best and all the strength in the world to get through this. Just keep telling yourself you're too good for him. And when he tries to crawl back.......which I don't doubt he will. Just tell him that "From now on, when you think of me, Remember I was the best thing you COULD OF had!"

Good Luck.

We're all proud of you! Stay strong and best of luck. It's a cliche, but when you close one door another one opens for you

Originally Posted by JavannaLynn

Oh btw I broke-up with him about an hour ago... and he didn't seem to care really.....

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JavannaLynn, I think you had already made that decision before you talked to us, but you just needed a little support. My guess is that although you may miss him, you are happier already. It sounds like there was nothing in it for you.

Hug them kitties!!!

so glad you got out while you can.... it's so easy to stay, but takes guts to leave! Best of luck to you!

*Hugs*

I'm glad you did what you feel was right...and if he didn't care, well that's just way too bad on his part. You deserve more than that.

Good luck moving on.

Originally Posted by aphrodeia

*many hugs and much support*

It's easy for us to say that you did the right thing, and I truly believe that you'll think so, too... but it's still hard to step up and do what needs to be done. Good on you!

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Good for you!

well... we talked alot last night... we decied I get the apartment because I also get the cats. althought demon was his and angel was mine. I told him I would fight him for the cats and he said no I can have him... he actually seemed more upset that I wouldn't let him have the cat then that I wouldn't let him stay with me. He is moving out. I am not making him hurry I gave him 30 days. I actually left after we broke-up and went to my sister's for a hug. and he got on the computer and was talking to her husband. I couldn't believe it and he didn't say anything to him about it. I can't say he really didn't care.... he just didn't try to talk me out of it. he cried I was kinda suprised. but he did tell me he knew it was coming.
And for what you said lilleah about getting back together. this is the back together. We broke up last feb (over a year ago) and got back together when we went to Ceder Point in may. he moved in with me in July. and things were the same as the first time. We broke up the first time for the same reason all we did was fight. I was unhappy and so was he. He had a fling with some girl he worked with that has had sex with EVERYONE IN TOWN! and I had a little fling with my bestfriend who I think might move in with me (Different Room). He (best friend) is completely in love with me. But I just don't feel it. He would do anything to have me and I know it (no I do not use it against him ever). Maybe something will happen now that I am not with my bf anymore who knows. Not right away I know that for sure. I guess I just take my mother's advise and take it day by day hour by hour.
I really have a hard time believe I really broke up with him. It still makes me cry, even though I know I am better off... I really do love him.... my Angel saw me crying and came to rub on my face... thank-you guys sooooo much....

Sorry to chime in late here but I really don't know if letting someone who is totally in love with you move in with you is the best idea. I think that just may lead to some problems. He may be your best friend, but I don't know. I just think I wouldn't rush into something like that yet.