bonding with my cat

I love my brand new little tabby cat. She's 7 months old and I got her from a college kid. She had been passed around from dorm to dorm because people kept getting caught with her and she had no permanent home. I wanted to take her in because I heard she was really sweet and affectionate and I wanted to give her a good home.

When I first got her she was very affectionate and would sleep with me at night. Now, it's been about 2 weeks, maybe more, and she has gotten a lot more aloof. She doesn't seem like she's bonded with me at all and I wanted her to be as affectionate as she was right away. I just got her spayed last week and I think she's recovered from that.

How can I get her to like me more? I really wanted her to be a little lap cat and to approach me like she did in the beginning.

I'm not sure because I have the same kind of cat. I think you just have to leave them be, and when they want attention they will let you know. You can't force them.

it most likely has a lot to do with her being spayed...just give her time, to get over that-you probably are teh one who took her to the vet, no? well she remembers that, and that could be part of the reason she's being aloof-that and she just probably doesn't feel her best, cos she's recovering.

just be patient with her, offer her lots of snacks and treats but don't force her, let her come to you. i can't stress it enough-patience. as long as you're loving to her, she'll come back to you

Female cats sometimes just won't get cuddly with female people, even if they're 'friends', which I guess if you think about it might be understandable! At least two of ours have not been lap cats for me, but will roll over and play dead for my husband... and the males come to me for serious affection and treat my h. like a pariah! They are 'adult' animals who know the diff. between us, after all. But a couple of our fems have been ok, and the males with my h., so go figure!

It could also be the weather. My cats are less cuddly when it gets really hot out.

Do you play with her regularly? groom and reinforce her with treats?

Cats get more independent as they get older but you can entice them to see you as the special loved one you want to be by paying them attention of the style they want... play, chasing, food etc.

She's gotten used to her new home, so she's more sure of herself and is less dependent on you to be her security blanket. Try to establish a routine with her (cats love predictablity) and make sure you spend LOTS of time playing with her, grooming her, and even maybe even sitting on the floor with her while she eats, talking to her. Like others have said, when it warms up, my cats don't want to really be near me. They prefer cooler spots than my lap.

Don't give up and just be patient.

Stephanie

Originally Posted by Larke

Female cats sometimes just won't get cuddly with female people, even if they're 'friends', which I guess if you think about it might be understandable! At least two of ours have not been lap cats for me, but will roll over and play dead for my husband... and the males come to me for serious affection and treat my h. like a pariah! ....

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Same at our household!!!! I am glad someone else has experienced the same thing.