Need advice

I am new to this site as a poster but have been a long time reader.
I hope I am posting this in the right place.
Ok here's my problem.

To make a long story short, about 11 months ago a Mother cat and 2 babies showed up on our porch and we started feeding them and basically fell in love with them although we have never had cats, just dogs.

We live in the country, so it was pretty safe to just let them live on the porch and so they did.

We went through the winter and made them warm shelters, took them in for shots and had the boys neutered and spoke to the vet about having the mother spayed.

He said to get her in before spring to have her spayed because mother nature wouldn't let babies be born in the winter.

So although she was a feral/friendly to us cat and always seemed to stay on the porch on in our yard.

Lets just say she didn't get the memo about not getting pregnant before spring because it would have been late feb when she got prego, and it was still freezing weather!

So when we took her to the vet to get spayed we did not know she was already very prego!!

I will admit it we were cat dumb and did not have her fixed in time.

So the end of last month we woke up to her and 3 more babies.

So that brought our total to a mom, 2-boys almost 11 months old, and now 3 new babies!!

Well although we put up a big kennel on the porch for the mom and 3 babies we could not keep her safe since several stray tom cats had tried to get to the babies and we have raccoon out here and other animals that made it really hard to ensure their safety and moving them in the house was out of the questions since we have 2 big dogs that dislike cats.

Not to mention all of a sudden we saw 2 tom cats coming around that we had never seen before, and she did not need to be outside to get pregnant again!!

So We found a lady that would take the momma and the 3 new babies and keep them inside her home & let them get to the weaned age , then she would have the mom spayed and find homes for the kittens and she would keep the mom.

So we took the mom and babies out to her and she had a lot of animals and that is her life! We took her out enough food to last many months and have offered to pay for mom cat to be spayed the minute she's done nursing.

My problem is I got very attached to these cats and cried all the way home and 24 hours later, i am still heart broken.

I don't know how cats feel or if they grieve but I am a mom and my heart breaks for this mom cat who now has lost us, and her 2 older sons that she had for almost 11 months that were so close to her.

Not to mention It breaks my heart to think how the boys must feel coming up to the porch and mom is suddenly after almost 11 months NOT there anymore.

I know they have each other but please tell me how to help them get through this.Will they be ok?

I have talked to the lady that has the mom and kittens now for almost 2 days and she is doing ok and warming up to her and nursing and eating just fine.

Will she be ok? My husband is about ready to go back and get her and the babies so I will quit tearing up and worrying so bad about her and her sons, but I know her getting a home indoors and not having to live outside is really best for her.

Any advice please? I have been showering her sons left here with attention and have noticed them looking for her where her bed was on my porch, but I just want to know how to help them through this.

Thank you for listening! Jean

My dear, you have done the right thing for all concerned. Time will heal the hurt. The boys will be fine and Momma and the Babies will settle in at the new place in no time. Comfort yourself in knowing that they are safe and warm and well-cared for - you did the right thing.

Originally Posted by gayef

My dear, you have done the right thing for all concerned. Time will heal the hurt. The boys will be fine and Momma and the Babies will settle in at the new place in no time. Comfort yourself in knowing that they are safe and warm and well-cared for - you did the right thing.

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Thank you so much for your post. I am a big softy and just the thought of the mom being sad or the boys hurting and missing her breaks my heart!
I am the type that has always got a puppy at 12 weeks or so and kept them until they died! So this driving her over and leaving her was horrible!!

My husband keeps reminding me that when she showed up on our porch that we took her and her babies in and gave them 11 months of love and care, and her boys will be with us as long as they are alive. So I hope she knows we did the best thing for her.

Thanks Again ! My new project is to now catch a couple of the feral cats I have seen lately and get them fixed and return them to their space.

I am a big softy like that too ... I cry for days after my kittens leave for their forever homes and then I pester the living poop outta the people to tell me how they are doing. Lawdy, I do have patient people purchasing my kittens and I am ever so thankful for that!

You might look around in your area for an already-established feral program and see if they can assist you. I went on a couple of "ride-alongs" with some of the local volunteers in my area so I could see how they do things. They are chock-full of good advise and suggestions. Ferals can be wily and for the first few weeks I tried, I trapped everybody in the neighborhood BUT the one whole male I was trying for. My next-door neighbor's cat was the most-trapped cat in the land those few weeks, I'll tell ya!

Best of luck,

~g~

I want to offer you a hug

You definitely did the right thing...we don't do these things because we're big meanies...we do them out of love! Everything will be just fine...just know that what you did was because your heart was in the right place.

Originally Posted by gayef

You might look around in your area for an already-established feral program and see if they can assist you. I went on a couple of "ride-alongs" with some of the local volunteers in my area so I could see how they do things. They are chock-full of good advise and suggestions. Ferals can be wily and for the first few weeks I tried, I trapped everybody in the neighborhood BUT the one whole male I was trying for. My next-door neighbor's cat was the most-trapped cat in the land those few weeks, I'll tell ya!

Best of luck,

~g~

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I agree with Gaye's suggestion of contacting a feral cat group. That way...all the neighborhood strays can be fixed and are given a better life. If you would like to find an organization, just click the link below and click on your state:

http://www.alleycat.org/orgs.html

It really is a marvellous thing to give these cats a better life by getting them the shots and the spay/neuter they deserve.

Katie

Thank you all for your post.
I talked to the lady that has the mom cat and babies this morning and
they are doing fine.
I went out this morning to feed her boys that are still here with me.
I keep dry food down for them all the time but each morning I go out and give them a can of wet food.
Usually I am met with lots of meowing and happy little faces but this morning they just laid around looking out over the porch as if they are watching for mom.
One of the boys slept on the porch steps all night too.
It has to get easier, its so hard watching their little faces look sad.
Some people just don't get it.
My grown son said to me this morning, MOM They are animals!!
I am going to look into the feral cat groups to see what I can do to help.
Thanks again.

Sorry your heart is breaking but you did the right thing. The boys will adjust, it has only been a little while. Remember they still have each other a most important they have you and your family

The boys seem to be doing ok. They have been clinging to each other more than ever. So at least they have each other.
They caught a mouse outside last night, and are still playing and eating as normal.
I was sitting on the porch last night watching her favorite son sit on the front steps looking out, as if he was waiting for Mommy to return and I was in tears. It was hard to watch, knowing they were sad.
I ask my husband the same question I have ask him at least 100 times since Monday. "Do you think they boys are going to be ok"?
He said really I think your having a harder time than the cats!!
Its just so amazing to a lifetime dog lover how much these cats have got me attached to them!!