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D.T. for Tuesday

post #1 of 17
Thread Starter 
Where is everyone this morning? No one is posting and it's almost 10 a.m. EDT. Debra and Bodlover aren't eating poptarts! I feel as though I'm in the twilight zone! I know you're out there because I saw your names when I logged in. Tell me you are not suffering from post-holiday syndrome! We had a nice family cook-out and the weather in Western PA was and is lovely! I think Spring has finally settled in. Come on in; the water's fine!
post #2 of 17
Don't worry Jeanie, things aren't as strange as they seem love, Debra and I have already polished off a few boxes of PopTarts today!!
But you could do me a favour - gimme some of that there sunshine!! C'mon!! Don't be greedy!! We haven't got ANY here at the moment!! Its rainy and dull and you're hogging all the sun!!! HMPH!!!!! :laughing:
post #3 of 17
Good morning everyone! I'd send you some sunshine Rhea, but I don't really have any here either. We are suppossed to get rain today. The temperature is nice though. Upper 70's forecasted for today. :flower:
Hubby and I went miniature golfing yesterday and I also saw the movie Enough (the new JLo movie) with my sister and I also went to my parent's house on Saturday for a BBQ.
post #4 of 17
Good morning! I could really use another day to recover from the 3 day weekend. I went to the zoo yesterday with a friend and her 18-month old. It was a lot of fun, but my legs are sore from all the walking and I have sunburned forearms. At least I got to enjoy the sun-today is rainy and grey here in Cleveland. Sigh. At least I get to pick up my copy of "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone" tonight!
post #5 of 17
Well hellooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

I had a fairly nice holiday weekend. Friday night was nice. Hubby and I went driving around to see the historical area we live in but discovered that I needed to have my front brakes replaced a.s.a.p. We were driving around with the windows down and heard the squeeling and then the grinding noise that let us know. Evidently my Ford Focus is very sound proof because I had never heard the noise before. I had noticed that it was getting a little difficult to stop but I just figured it was getting close to needing them changed. Well hubby decided to not do it himself and ended up taking it somewhere to get it done on Saturday. What was surprising is that I only have 24,000 miles. I mentioned that at the shop and the guy said that the Ford Focus is making him rich! He said they are good little cars but are horrible on brakes, most cars don't need their brakes changed until around 40,000 miles.

Sunday we celebrated my FIL's birthday which was Monday. He is a very hard man to buy for. We bought him one of those massagers that you attach to your chair where you can adjust the speed and placement of the pulses. He really liked it, whew

Yesterday, we went to the zoo and I swear everybody else in the city of Houston had the same idea! After we got in the vicinity it took us an hour to find parking. Let me tell you, I was a pretty tense and frustrated driver

I'm working today and then I have tomorrow off. I think hubby and I are going to see About A Boy tomorrow.

Hope everyone is having a good day!
post #6 of 17
Thread Starter 
I haven't been to the zoo for such a long time! My daughter is a member of the Pittsburgh Zoo (no, not a resident!), so she can go any time. The next time she tells me she's going I think I'll go too. Thank goodness the zoos have natural habitats now. It used to be sad watching the big cats wander back and forth and the elephants shifting their weight from one chained leg to the other.
post #7 of 17
Since I've been off the computer since Friday around noon, it has taken me this long just to get through everything, and I've only looked at The Cat Lounge so far! I just didn't feel like being on the computer at all this weekend.

Other than not having to work, it was a pretty bad weekend for me. I am completely freaking out about my financial situation. My husband isn't working, and although I have told him that I can't support us on my measly secretary's salary he decided that he didn't really need to look for a job until maybe this week (he has to start working by next week or some things are going to be shut off). He hasn't really been working for about 1 1/2 years because of his auto accident. Well, up until the beginning of this year that was valid. Now I think he's just lazy and irresponsible, and I really don't know how much more of this I can put up with. Even spending the weekend with him was miserable for me because I kept thinking about how bad off we are and how he could get us out of this if he would even put forth half an effort. And to top it all off, there was something in the air of my apartment building that made me have asthma attacks all weekend (I'm sure the stress didn't help that either, but if I left the apartment even just to the balcony I could breathe).

Here I go ranting to all you again! I'm sorry.

Glad to hear everyone else's weekend was better than mine.
post #8 of 17
Thread Starter 
Dear Heidi, I like Hissy's saying: "been there, done that, got the t shirt!" I have asthma and scar tissue on my lungs so I can empathize. Also my husband had a business he didn't know how to run for the first 10 years of our marriage, and I had creditors threatening all the time. However, if your husband was in an accident and might get a settlement, you have to be patient. My son was in an accident, had to have back surgery, was off work so long he and his young wife couldn't wait much longer, so he worked and got paid under the table. He was just estimating jobs for the boss, but the insurance company found out and he got nothing for a permanent back injury. He's in constant pain. I'm sorry that I have no answers, but know that I understand.
post #9 of 17
Heidi, if you aren't waiting for a settlement like Jeanie suggested, maybe let the lights get turned off so he knows what it's like to spend all day in a place with no electricity. That might just open his eyes.

I hope all of this gets worked out for you soon!
post #10 of 17
Heidi, be glad you aren't here. We have a 15,000 acre forest fire in the mountains, just north of us. You can smell the smoke throughout the valley and the whole range is obscured. I'm glad Bill got that new breathing medicine, last week. I'm off today. We're picking up my new purple sofa, this afternoon. Bill wanted to move the old one, alone but I put my foot down and told him to wait until he can get some guys from work. Its a 7-foot sofabed and it weighs a ton! Let those young dudes do the heavy lifting. Rowdy slept through the night, again! She's, even making friendly overtures, toward Ike. The household is, finally, calming down. Have a good one, everyone!
post #11 of 17
Jeanie, thanks for the empathy. It's nice to know someone else has been through this type of thing. Sabra - that's exactly what one of my friends told me! I figure if the internet gets shut off he won't be able to function. I have it here at work so it wouldn't bother me that much.

I don't think he will get any kind of settlement. It was a single car accident, when he threw a temper tantrum (seriously) and ran his car into a telephone pole. He has been released to work by his Dr., and the insurance money for lost wages ran out last Sept. His back isn't that bad. He just plain doesn't want to work. He would much rather do favors for friends for free. He produces a radio show and doesn't get paid for it, but that is much more important than looking for work.

I know I shouldn't villify him, but right now that's about all I see in him, and I know that's really bad.

Thanks for listening again.
post #12 of 17
We are having major computer problems at work today. Our main systems aren't working and out back up system is pathetic! Oh well. I can't wait - I get to watch the Mole 2 tonight and get my Harry Potter DVD with 7 deleted sceens and games. Wooohoo - I love DVDs. I hope everyone has a great day!
post #13 of 17
I have returned to school for one more month before I finally finish for good. I have to take Rascal to the vet because I think he has ear mites or an ear infection because he's been scratching his ears and I've notices red scabs in his ears. I don't see any black dots that look like mites, but I will know when I see the vet. Nothing special going on with me, just working. Hope everyone has a great day!
post #14 of 17
Thread Starter 
Oh good! The Mole! I forgot. Thanks, Adymarie.
Heidi, I agree with sfell. You will have to prepare for the turnoff, and the electric co. will charge you to turn it back on, but it might work. He will be furious with you for not paying the bill, but you should have all sorts of receipts, reminders, and termination notices. Show him in black and white that you will have to turn off the cable in order to pay the bills, and that you have called the cable company. If he isn't willing to discuss things then, or consider getting a job, I wonder where his values are.

If he has a pager, give that number to all of your creditors, or tell them the man responsible will be home at a certain time. Ask for their first name, number, and extension, and tell hubby "so and so" called; I told him I'd have you call back." Let him feel the pressure. I was raising three children when we went through this, and I gave every creditor his business number. Some still called and harassed me, but fewer than before, because I told them I knew nothing about the finances. I recommend marriage counseling. Many charitable organizations offer it. My husband refused, but.....marriage is worth working at.
post #15 of 17
Well, we did have a little talk this weekend about everything. He just seems to think that everyone will give him what he wants or needs just because. Apparently most of his life this has worked. He did apologize for putting me through all of this, and he is actually going out to pound the pavement this afternoon. I did also tell him that it would be his things that will be shut off - his cell phone 1st, his internet, etc. I think that put the fear of God (or the fear of the wrath of a woman) in him.

Thing is, I can mostly cover the bills, and I am not going to put myself in the position where something essential to me and the kitties will be shut off (like electricity), or go without for the kitties. They will be taken care of even if I have to live on Ramen noodles.

So far, the creditors haven't been calling yet since I've been able to keep our heads slightly above water (not more than 30 days late), but June consists of two short pay periods for me so I won't be able to make it work.

Thanks for the support. I really needed to vent.
post #16 of 17
Thread Starter 
I am so glad he is going to pound the pavement. My husband is a wonderful person. He just wore rose colored glasses; ignore the problem and it will go away. He's still like that. They have to find out first hand what it's like to deal with life's problems. I hope he gets a job. Marriage is a two-way street. You can't do it all alone. Good luck and prayers.
post #17 of 17
Your hubby sounds a lot like mine. He really isn't doing this to be malicious or sponge me (no matter how much it feels like it on my end). His real problem is that he does not get money at all. It is like talking quaantum physics to most of us. It is a totally foreign concept to him. We go shopping and spend $20 at 5 different places, and he cannot figure out what happened to all of that $100. He's not stupid, and he's not playing dumb. He truly doesn't get it. Granted, I still think in general he has been lazy and irresponsible these past couple of weeks when he should have been looking for a job. But at least I know he's really not a bad person. Knowing his luck he will come home with a job today. He's that kind of person. Things do seem to work out for him when he really needs them to.

Thanks again Jeanie, and to everyone else for letting me take over the DT. I helps so much to "talk" about it.
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