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What do you do when you feel you don't fit in?

post #1 of 17
Thread Starter 
Lately at work I notice that I really don't fit in with the other people my age. Some of it is because I'm not a drinker & I really don't like to go to bars, but I am totally differnt than most of them. Normally it doesn't bother me, but for some reason today I feel like I'm very much on the outside looking in. I will be looking for a new job very soon, but what do I in the mean time?
post #2 of 17
Just hang tough. I am in the same situation. I am settled down with the guy I want to marry and don't party and there is very little drama in my life. Almost everyone other girl in the office has some sort of drama. I am the youngest and the one closest to my age is annoying, her office buddy has constant drama that i hear 27 thousand times as she re-tells the stories to everyone in the office.

I just ignore most of them and keep to myself. I come here to get paid not to socialize. I do have some office buddies that I like to talk to though.
post #3 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rang_27
Lately at work I notice that I really don't fit in with the other people my age. Some of it is because I'm not a drinker & I really don't like to go to bars, but I am totally differnt than most of them. Normally it doesn't bother me, but for some reason today I feel like I'm very much on the outside looking in. I will be looking for a new job very soon, but what do I in the mean time?
I say try not to worry about it and look forward to getting a new job. Maybe concentrate on that a little more to get your mind off it. Not drinking among regular drinkers will really make you feel out of place. I've been there.
post #4 of 17
Life is to short to worry. Go make yourself happy. (I need to listen to my own advice)
post #5 of 17
I'm similar, but everyone here is married with kids. So MOST don't go out drinking.
Really? It's sad I know, but I just look at it as I'm here to pay the bills. You could try looking for a new job, but you run the same risk.

Try looking for people that do have similar interests as you.

If you're like me and looking for local friends, try volunteering or joining a social group. You should be able to find someone with similar interests there.
post #6 of 17
You just have to try and remember that it just a job, and like you said you don't get paid to socialize. So I would just focus on doing the job and just worry about friends and family that you care about and that care about you. Maybe your next job will have more people you can relate with.

I know how you feel...all the ladies at my office are married with a house and all established. I feel like I have nothing to relate with them as I have a boyfriend, rent an apartment and am nowhere near buying a house.

It's tough sometimes, but just think about the really important things in life..(not your coworkers)
post #7 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by momof3rugratz
Life is to short to worry. Go make yourself happy. (I
Well said Jenny!
post #8 of 17
I am a big fan of being true to your own self. If you imitate just to 'fit in', you'll still feel out of place.
post #9 of 17
I start talking to myself a lot so people get freaked out and leave me alone!
post #10 of 17
Not "fitting in" with the group is perfectly ok and gives you all the more opportunity to shine with your own authentic personality! Good for you for not giving in a part of yourself or putting on a display just be a part of a group of individuals with whom you really don't feel you belong, you'll be the one who deserves admiration. Why seek to blend in when you can be your own shining star!
post #11 of 17
Come down to Chicago and be a non-drinker, non-bar crawler with me!
post #12 of 17
At my old job I didn't fit in well either as I was the only women out of 7 that didn't have children plus I was at least 7 years older that the next in age. They always talked either about their kids or their lack of $$. I learned to tune most of them out but I tell you lots of time I just wanted them to shut up!!!
Thankfully I'm not in that situation anymore!!
post #13 of 17
If you fancy moving my way we are looking for staff and you can join me in being the odd one out I need the company in my office

At least your coworkers just go out and party/drink, two of mine drink AT work.

But I agree, you are not at work to socialise (although it helps if you don't not get along with everyone as it makes it difficult to get along), maybe try to find something you have in common with your co workers that you can talk about... we talk all day about our animals because its the only thing we really have in common
post #14 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rang_27
Lately at work I notice that I really don't fit in with the other people my age. Some of it is because I'm not a drinker & I really don't like to go to bars, but I am totally differnt than most of them. Normally it doesn't bother me, but for some reason today I feel like I'm very much on the outside looking in. I will be looking for a new job very soon, but what do I in the mean time?
Well, you fit in with US, so just take frequent breaks and socialize here.
post #15 of 17
I know how your feeling! I've always been considered the "dud" of whereever I work. I mean, I like to have fun as much as anyone, but I've never been a partier, a person who goes out and gets drunk, etc. I'm a homebody and always have been, even through my 20's and 30's. Even Jerry knows that when I'm going out with the girls, it's totally harmless. Dinner and usually home by 9. Now where I work is different. There's just basically me and the office manager. We're both in our 40's and have alot in common, although come to think of it, Debi does have alot of drama in her life.

Just be yourself and that's totally good enough!
post #16 of 17
I think the problem in our office is the age difference, I am 24 the other 'non drinker' is in her late 50s/early 60s and the drinkers are late 30s early 40s and men who think we over react about everything because our customers are always oh so polite when they get a guy ~because obviously men know more~
post #17 of 17
I don't fit into a lot of situations. I'm different. I'm myself, and I love it!
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