Can a cat be too affectionate? Can it be a problem.

Hi,

One of my cats, Wesley, is way too affectionate, which is sweet and I love him. But what annoys me about his behaviour is the fact that he always gets in my face. And I mean it literally. He sticks his wet nose into my nose, cheecks, mouth, etc. He likes to hang around me when I watch TV and I appreciate it, but he won't always just curl up and sit still. He has to stump all over me, get in my way, stare at me which can get disturbing at times. He gets aggressive and posessive at this too. When I cook in the kitchen he hangs around my feet which makes it hard for me to move around without stepping on his paws or tripping. Oh yeah and he follows me around anywhere I go, bathroom including. Chichi is nothing like that, she is independent, affectionate at certain times but is always respectful to my personal space.

He is now 9 month old and has been fixed since I got him at 3 month. Oh yeah, when I have guests in the house, he "targets" them as well which sometimes makes me feel embarassed for him as they don't always appreciate it. How do I train him to be more independent, self sufficient and have some respect for human personal boundaries? Your insight and advice would be appreciated.

Sounds normal to me?!. Where i go theres always one of mine right behind me.

I no longer sit down to breakfast when Rosies on my lap because she knows she gets a treat after i've ate, but i love it

Wesley sounds like my Willow!

Willow will rub all over my face and everywhere even when I'm sleeping! The only difference is that he will not go to others, he just does this to me!!

If Wesley is doing this when you don't want him to, you can pick him up and put him on the floor and repeat if he gets back up. You could also try to distract him by throwing a toy for him to chase! (it'll grow into a game of fetch, but you should be able to get some time appart!)

I love Willow even when he wakes me being in my face, I wouldn't change his ways for the world! (Tibby and Molly are both similar to this, but Willow's is highly amplified!! )

Well, treat it like any other annoying behavior you want stopped. But you should be consistent. Cats will go as far as you let them.

Thanks guys,

I love Wesley to pieces. And most of the times I like his affection displays as well. It's just that sometimes I would rather him leave me alone. When I let him know that in a loving way by just gently putting him on the floor, he doesn't get it. I have to actually raise my voice or sqirt him or push him away.

And I would really prefer him not to harrass my guests, particularly the ones that want to be left alone. I don't want anybody to be mean to my kitty and trow him on the floor. (it happened before) Not everyone is crazy about cats like we are.

My biggest question here is, why is he in such a desperate need of affection? Is it because I give it too much to him and he is used to it or is it because I don't give him enough of it? Should I approach it by smothering him with love and attention, spoiling him rotten untill he gets enough of it and desides to be more independent (if that's what's going to happen). Or should I disipline him more, like saying "NO", time outs, squirt bottles, etc.

The problem with the guests is easy to solve, just keep Wesley in another room until they leave.
With you, I think Wesley will get it after a while. Keep on putting him on the floor when he's starts overdoing it. I don't recommend the squirt bottle. Time outs may make him more clingy. I think NO is okay (if he knows what it means ) I know Wesley will be able to control his show of love to you in time. Good luck!

I have found that if Willow is getting too much (like when I'm working) I consistently put him on the floor and he's eventually getting it! He will sit on the floor and look at me for a while and then bring a toy for me to throw!

I'll admit that often it takes numerous times for me to get the message across, but it does work....eventually!

You should try reading a newspaper with my cat around!

One of the problems with guests who don't appreciate cats is that cats signal that it's ok to approach them by looking away. It's universal for felines, from domestic cats to big cats. Most of the time guests who don't want to be clambered all over will avoid looking at the cat who is eyeing them up as a seat and thus sends a clear signal that they welcome it!

In constrast people who love cats often look directly at the cat hoping it will come to them but to a cat it's a sign to stay away unless there is a strong bond there already.

Not sure my cat understands cat psychology though, she'll roll around in front of anyone with the potential to feed her!

omg i cant believe another person has a cat named willow! i have one named willow, and the other birch

I've just been trying to work and my girl did her usual trick of walking back and forth over my paperwork.. it's so deliberate.  I just keep moving her and firmly say no and she finally gives in.. It happens every time; she doesn't stop giving it a go, we just have to go through the little ritual every  time.

I once had a cat who sounds just like Wesley. 

She was with me for ten years (she was three when I got her).  I remember she used to drive me mad, but I loved her incredibly.  She was my pussycat soul-mate, and I still miss her terribly all these years later. 

I guess what I'm saying is that Wesley may be over the top, but I'll bet you adore him all the same; how special it is to have such a loving boy.

On a the practical side, Yayi gave good advice!

I don't like to tell anyone how to raise their children... err... cats, but any form of punishment I.E. squirt bottle, time out, etc is only going to confuse your little friend. A firm NO is all that is really needed combined with behavior modification. Cats don't respond well to punishment. Don't do it.

Or cat Zeppelin is like that sometimes. In the night he will get on the bed and crawl on tip of me, all the easy up in my shoulder and state at me while purring until acknowledge him. If I don't, he will stand on me or put his paw in my face/mouth and try grabbing at my face. He is declawed do I don't get scratched, but he's a heavy cat. Over 15 pounds. My bf encourages him since he find it amusing and isn't the target. I love him to death l, but it's a bit much sometimes. Not to mention creepy.

I agree that cats can be too affectionate, that's because they tend to use their own cat language to express it, not human language.

I strongly agree with the person who said to throw a toy for distraction, and that it could turn into fetching games. I had two cats, both rescued as young feral kittens that got sick and injured, so they really bonded with me and saw me as "mom" or something which was annoying. They would crawl up me, grab onto me, sleep on my face, all sorts of things.

I distracted fluffy with a ball... and then he LIVED for the ball. Slept with it, played fetch for hours, sometimes by himself, dropping it down the stairs. Everyday, for two years. Instead of grabbing my leg, he'd mostly sit, with the ball at his paws, and stare expectantly.

Didn't work for bobo. I taught him and fluffy to sit, it worked the best. It was tricky giving two cats treats at the same time since they'd jostle each other. But once they sit for treats, they'll sit for other things. I find that once cats sit, they go in observing mode.

I trained mine by using both palms in the stop gesture, saying sit, and guiding them back with my foot. Once he/she sits, immediately reward with a treat. Repeat, repeat. They tend to get the idea quickly where there's food involved.

Or you could just carry your cat around til he's sick of it haha.

Oh my gosh ! My cat is exactly the same he won't leave me alone and he claws all the time in my face we love him but it stressful it all the time and he won't take no for an answer he gets straight back up there he is also traumatizing my female cat who has been spayed but he just doesn't leave her alone and attacks her playfully i think and he is too young for it to be sexual ( 4months old ) I feel mean keep putting him off me ! Any tips ??x 

U realize this thread is from 2006, right?

I wish I could find a cat that wanted to be around me all the time In my opinion better then a cat that you can't find for days because he has found every hiding place in the house Note: I don't own my own cat as of yet, only foster so I've seen all kinds