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What would you do?

post #1 of 15
Thread Starter 
My best friend since early childhood.We have been best friends since todlers going on 45 years! We see each other daily. Are kids grew up together she lives a mile from me we work together often .Landscapers. Weare closer then sisters!!
She has a female doberman that she is breeding and is giving me one of the puppies. I have always wanted one. No heres the kicker. I mentioned last night that I am not going to have the dobermans ears or tail cut.I believe thats cruel. Well she went ballistic on me . She said then why bother and have a doberman if you not going to have it look like one. Well I feel god made them with tails and ears and thats what they are supposed to look like.The cropped ears and tail. Are done to them to make them look like this. She really was insistent that I have to have the puppies ears and tail chopped off. Well no way.! If its my dog I should go with my heart and leave the pup the way he was born.
I don"t want this to cause problems with are friendship. We have never ever had a disagreement till now. What would you do? I guess its best if I just pass on the free pup. Even though I really want one. She almost said "if your not going to cut the pups ears and tail then I really don't want to give you one" Not in those exact words but that was her meaning.
post #2 of 15
Ask her outright if she will still give you a pup if you dont cut its ears and tail. If she says no, get a pup from someone else and make it clear theres no hard feelings.

When it comes down to it i think she would rather the pup got a good home than was docked.
post #3 of 15
I wouldn't take the pup if she can't agree with you not doing the ears and tail... otherwise, that might always be an issue between you both.

That's too bad that she can't see your point. If you don't care about the looks of the ears and tail, she should honor that.
post #4 of 15
My gosh, what a reaction from her? I don't understand it at all. I have clients with a pair of doberman's that aren't docked, and they are adorable.

I'd say, if she is going to be like that, you shouldn't take the pup from her. Or, offer to pay, and then she can't dictate the terms.
post #5 of 15
I agree with everyone else so far. If she feels that strongly that the pup's ears and tail should be docked, and you don't want to do it, it's only going to create a rift between you.
For the record, I think Dobies are cute with ears and tail intact.
post #6 of 15
I do hope that she will let you have the Dobie anyway. Years ago, my sis' ex-husband had their Dobie's ears & tail cropped and it was so sad how that poor dog suffered. She'd bump a bandaged ear & scream & yelp & then whine. I really hope that you get the puppy, for both your benefit & the puppy's....
post #7 of 15
Personally,I've always thought it barbaric to continue the practice of tail & ear cropping. But it's such a standard practice that the opponent's are outnumbered and the proponents really don't see it as something cruel.
You don't want this to cause a big rift in such a valuable friendship. I agree with the advice that if your friend absolutely won't budge, then don't get the puppy. You shouldn't compromise your principles for her by getting it docked because she insisted, you would always be unhappy about it.
post #8 of 15
I've always thought that docking ears and tails is a barbaric practice. I'd agree with Nicky... if she won't give you the pup if you won't dock it's ears and tail, then get one from elsewhere.
post #9 of 15
I'd say to her, I'd really like to have one of your puppies, but I need to be clear with you that its tail and ears won't be touched. If that's a problem for you, please say so. We're each entitled to our opinion, and if that's going to be a problem for us, I'd rather just not go there. I'll think about getting a puppy from someone else.
post #10 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by maverick_kitten
Ask her outright if she will still give you a pup if you dont cut its ears and tail. If she says no, get a pup from someone else and make it clear theres no hard feelings.

When it comes down to it i think she would rather the pup got a good home than was docked.
I agree 100%!!!
Linda
post #11 of 15
Could it be she regrets offering you a free dog and is looking for an excuse to not give it to you? Whatever the reason, if you want to keep her as a friend, you two will probably have to work it out regardless of whether you take the dog. If she visits you and the "uncropped" dog, she will always be reminded of you not following her advice. If you don't want to get into it, and you want to keep her as a friend, I would tell her I changed my mind, don't want a dog with or without a tail. Just my thoughts on the subject.
good luck
post #12 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by gardenandcats
I don"t want this to cause problems with are friendship. We have never ever had a disagreement till now. What would you do? I guess its best if I just pass on the free pup. Even though I really want one.
Just tell her that. It is odd to not have any disagreements after 45 years together! It was bound to happen eventually. And this is a very touchy subject, because to her, those dogs are perfect when cropped. She is probably seeing you not wanting to crop as a slam on her decision to crop.

I used to foster kittens, and even though they weren't bred by me, I did become rather protective of them. I became very uncomfortable with anyone who wanted to adopt and considered declawing. She is the same with her pups...knowing they can be show material, and if not docked and cropped they probably can't be shown, and just don't look right to her.

Let her know that you think her dogs are fabulous, and that is why you want one. But if you get one, you really don't want the docking and cropping. Let her know the dog will be loved for a lifetime. It is possible that she is planning on giving you the lesser quality pup of the litter...knowing you just want a wonderful pet and not a breeding quality animal. Maybe she plans on waiting until they are a few weeks old before deciding which one is best for you, and they are docked very young (I think).

You have been friends for 45 years...you can work this out. You are not condemning her...just saying you don't want your puppy to be cropped! If she won't give you a puppy without cropping, you just won't get one of her puppies, right? But you will still be friends.
post #13 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beckiboo
And this is a very touchy subject, because to her, those dogs are perfect when cropped. She is probably seeing you not wanting to crop as a slam on her decision to crop.
I think thats it exactly. Stick to your decision though, just because its socially acceptable and because its been done for years doesn't make it right. Women's feet were bound in the Orient for years too.

If she can't agree with your decision, get a dog from sonmone else so there won't be any hard feelings. Tell her that her puppies are beautiful, you just prefer them the way they were born.
post #14 of 15
I agree, I don't believe in cutting their ears. Tails aren't as bad, at least they're only 2 days old when they have it done and supposedly the pain goes away really quick, I don't know if I believe that but anyway, I think it's cruel to crop the ears. Stand firm, but I'm sure you'll work it out.
post #15 of 15
I don't see why tails should be docked either. What's the reasoning behind this anyway? And how on earth would any human know how and when the pain goes away? Tails are an important tool for communication for dogs, docking them gives them a disadvantage.
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