Please help..cats don't get alnog

About two months ago I picked up a stray cat outside of a Denny's. She's very friendly and loves to be loved. However, my other female, Akasha, doesn't appreciate her at all. Now the new girl, Squitchy, won't come out from under my night stand. She's terrified of Akasha. I don't know what to do. Akasha loves the other kitten in the house. And so does Squitchy. Please help...I don't want to have to give up either of my girls.

You might try separating them and reintroducing them. Make sure there are plenty of hiding places in your home so they can get away from each other when they need to.

My three girls only just tolerate each other. All three would probably rather be only cats. However, animals WILL adapt. Don't get rid of them. They will work it out.

You shouldn't have to give any of them out unless they are fighting so severely that you are rushing them to the vet. Suggest you read Amy Shojai's new book PETiQuette that deals with multi-animal households.

I've tried seperating them...doesn't work. I am ashamed to admit I've even locked them in the same closet together...alot of growling but not fighting. Akasha will go after poor Squitchy for no apparent reason. I just feel so bad for Squitchy...she won't even go to the litter box anymore and now she has an abscess on her bottom lip..Now I'm not sure if it's from Akasha or not but still..a trip to the vets. What about those pharamone things that plug into the wall?

If you have more than one cat, you need more than one litterbox, more than one food bowl, more than one water bowl, etc. Otherwise the "guarding" behavior that you describe will lead to problems with diet or elimination.

I promise you that if you lose your own anxiety over their conflicts, they will calm down some -- if only because they won't be sensing tension from you. Two months is not a very long time for cats to learn to get along when they aren't littermates. My three have been together only about four months and there are STILL dust-ups just about every day. However, eventually they will stay out of each other's way.

Here's the thing...yes I am very concered about injuries, but I've tried yelling..I've tried doing nothing..I've tried it all. These are not dust ups. I have three cats in the house...three food bowls, three water bowls, three litter boxes. However, the one set of bowls and one litter box is in my bedroom, where Squitchy is. Akasha uses the box but doesn't use the bowls in there very often. Maybe I can put another box in the room? Will that help? I just very frustrated with the situation.

Please do be patient! I know how difficult it can be!

I have had my new kitten, Willow, for three months and things are still rather unsettled! The problem is between Molly and Willow - Tibby is fine with both of them!

I can agree that you need to keep calm yourself! They can sense this and it makes things better! It will take time, but eventually, your cats will be able to tolerate eachother!

Please don't yell at them because this will stress them out

At the end of the day you just have to have some patience with them

could you try keeping the door closed when squishys in that room time for her to calm down and use the loo, when the other cats not around to annoy her or if the bossy cat gets outside , let squishy have free roam while the others are outside

I also had problems when introducing my two kitties. They fought very often and Bootsie suffered several scratches to her nose in the process. I think what helped the most was just (about 2 months of) time, but after that I'd say that getting them a multi-level scratching tree and taking time to play with them with their toys made a significant difference as well.

Furbum - those are excellent suggestions! Taking time out to play with each of them (alone in a room) really helps them feel better.

Also, having 3 dimensions is so important. Height is often a position of status, and having the ability to go up in their territory can really help reduce tension.

We brought in a sixth kitty - Ming Loy. She's handicapped, can't jump, and now 1 1/2 years old has developed enough co-ordination to climb a bit. She's fast-moving on the ground and loves chasing the other cats. It would drive them insane if they couldn't swing up six feet onto the top of a cat tree in a flash!

Yes - put another litterbox in your bedroom. If that's where Squitchy is and she isn't using the box and won't go out to use another box, I'd try adding a second to the room.

Confining them together in a small space is the opposite of what should be done. Confining the new kitty by herself to a small space (but large enough for a litterbox, food, water and room to play) would have been the way to go when you first brought her home. That gives her time to get used to a new home and the people in it. And it gives her time to get used to the new smells of other pets - and it gives the other pets time to get used to her smell.

But that not having been done, unless there are serious injuries, time will work out their relationships. The most important thing is for you to spend time with each of them individually - especially Squitchy.

Also, Susan is right. Yelling at them won't help - it'll add to their tension. If you've tried other methods of behavior modification (like squirting water at the fighting kitties), this won't help either.

Cats are territorial animals, and they also have a hierarchy. The addition of a new cat has upset the applecart, and until they get it all worked out, it seems there will be some fur flying.

Feliway may help. It did for us. You can either purchase the plug-ins, or you can purchase spray bottles (you have to reapply the spray every three days or so. In our experience it doesn't stain wood, walls, or material). You should be able to find either at a pet store.

You can also consider purchasing Bach's Flower remedy for multi-cat household. This is available at www.catfaeries.com. Put a few drops in the water, or touch a drop behind each kitty's ears.

We had five cats living in an RV. The addition of each one always came with apprehension and fighting somewhere. We found creating multi-level space and LOTS of extra play time to be the best cures for getting everyone settled again.

It's also been our experience that male cats are FAR more social than the females. The boys generally take to new kitties pretty quickly, and the girls hold out the longest. Spooky takes at least six weeks before she'll stop being aggressive to a new kitty. With the introduction of Ming Loy it took almost three months.

LDG- thank you for your input..I'll try spending more time with each cat seperatly..my roomie just got rid of her kitten(she is engaged to a man with is allergic and will be moving in with him soon). my biggest problem was that i didn't have the space to confine Squitchy to a seperate room. Akasha does have a cat tower (home made that is over 6 feet tall) but this isn't an issue since it's downstairs. I will have to try the sprays and see what happens. Thank you all for your suggestions!!! I am so glad I found this site.

There's a book that I found EXTREMELY helpfull called 'CAT VS. CAT' by Pam Bennett.

Try a Google search for more information....you might be able to find this book at your local library(I did!)