The latest craze in this small town - Page 2

My parents did much the same thing. Alcohol was not used heavily, but WAS enjoyed, and I was permitted to partake in moderation from my early teens. I could have had beer, but wasn't interested in it, having surreptitiously tasted my Dad's when I was 7 or 8, and found it so awful I nearly tossed my cookies. So it was mostly wine on special occasions.

But it was always quite clear that there was nothing forbidden about the consumption of alcohol -- only the irresponsible consumption of it. And yes I did, once I was of legal drinking age, learn what a hangover felt like, and that I wasn't that keen on repeating it, thanks. But the earlier tolerance and guidance stood me in good stead.

I think you're right, Allie. Unfortunately, the trend is going in the opposite direction. There were no such things as "helicopter parents" when I went to college. They were happy to get us out! LOL

Now kids aren't allowed to have competition in sports, or be disciplined in school (or at home for that matter), fail in school (seriously - my step-nephew failed 8th grade twice and they were going to just put him ahead anyway because they couldn't let him fall that far behind his class. He's being home-schooled now.). In some places teachers can't even use red ink because it will somehow "damage" them.

Kids can't play outside unsupervised or coordinated by an adult, walk or ride their bikes around the neighborhood, or just play a pick-up game of kick ball. So the little things that little kids used to do, little stupid things that would get their knee scraped, they can't anymore. They can't test their boudaries when it's still safe.

They are so oversupervised that when they get a small chance at freedom they go nuts. And instead of sledding down "Killer Hill" (my sister did that - cracked her tailbone, but that was the worst that happened), they are "hill-topping" or doing this 21 Shots things and killing themselves.

Depends on the kid. My husband's little sis is almost 21, and she hasn't got her driver's license yet, mostly because she's scared to drive. Of course, that's not really the lesson we wanted her to learn ...

I totally agree with this.

I really think that kids have way more good in them than many adults give them credit for. Maybe we should be encouraging this, rather than being so mistrustful. As the Ellen fish in Finding Nemo said, "If you don't let anything happen to him, then nothing's ever gonna happen to him" I tend to agree with this. I think that the more adults hover over their children, the more the kids will act out and try to rebel. About half a century ago, someone my age (I'm 20) would be likely married and beginning to start a family. And yet, my parents won't even let me manage my own bank account (I do anyway...my big rebellion, haha!) It just seems like the longer we draw out this childhood thing, the worse the results are going to be. Being a kid gets old.

My family were like Denise's too. We were allowed alcohol from a young age and I think this set me in good stead for when I was going to parties and of legal age to drink.

I would go to regular parties on the weekend at a friend's house when we were between 12-17. My friend's parents were always in the house at the time of the parties and there was a rule that we could only have lager/bitter/guinness - no spirits. Obviously once in a while we would sneak spirits in.

We would also drink something similar to that 21 shot thing, but it would be made up of a selection of whatever was in a friend's parents drinks cabinet - but we did not have to down it, just share it around.

I think that as my friends and I all had parents who were allowing us to experiment with alcohol, we were set with a good basis for when we would be drinking on our own terms - most of us know when we've had enough!

I too remember the mixed up drinks thing - the idea was that it was poured into the glass in such a way as to create layers of different coloured stuff. I never drank any though, I'm too useless at drinking!

Re. the hill-topping thing, last year two local teenagers died when the cars they were passengers in crashed during a race on a hill. The drivers of the cars are now facing prison on a number of charges.

Sue

If i mix my drinks even though i don't have many i'm really ill

I like my wine but theres no way i'd be able to do the 21 shooters

I've always been honest with my mum so she has allowed me to drink from an early age, and if she knew whose house I was going to and the parents she would even buy me a few bottles of alchopops (which I can't stand now). I don't think this is irresponsible and will do the same for my children, providing they are honest with me. If my mum didnt buy it I would have drank anyway and god knows what I would have been drinking!
I've never mixed my drinks to such an extent as that and my friends never did it either. They got really really drunk, alot of the time but they drank beer.
Now I get so sick if I drink anything other than white wine that I never touch a drop of anything else! Wine makes me sick if I drink too much, but I would be sick after 1 vodka.
I watch a programme on Sky called 'Booze Britain' and it follows groups of young people round on a night out and you watch them go from nice and sober to disgustingly drunk idiots. They binge until they don't know what day of the week it is and end up fighting with their friends over NOTHING.
Whats the point?

I watch that Booze Britain as well and i cringe watching it

Yes, teens are more trustworthy than we think. They want to do the correct thing, they want to be good people, they really want to understand the world and themselves. But they need adult experience and supervision to achieve it.

I attribute the increase of this type of drinking events and increase in "hard" drug use plus the HUGE increase in violence of adolescent boys to the break down on the home and family unit in our "modern society".
There are generations of children who raise themselves, who do not know where food comes from (other than grocery store), and have little respect for themselves much less authority.

Not every home is like this (mine isn’t and I suspect most here are not either), but the trend is to:

take the discipline away from the parents and authority figures.
Put the burden of responsibility on teens olds to educate themselves on life’s realities.
expose these young people to all of life’s cruelties, lust and greed at a very young age and expect that they can decipher the differences in "fame" versus reality.

Just carefully watch prime time TV and commercials. Teens are assaulted by images and suggestions directed at age groups of 12+ years old. This market segment holds the most growth to advertisers. Its fact.
Children are being educated about what their parents can and cannot do to discipline them. The schools are helpless and take no stance.

Our government, Lawyers and media promote this type of “education†to our children while limiting the ability to teach them values or morals or Consequences of their actions.

As they grow outside the boundaries of our homes, they do what comes naturally to anything without bounds, Bolt and go wild.

must be a soap box day for me. sorry.

I just wish, and I wished this when I was in high school and I STILL wish this about college kids, that kids would be held accountable for things. Given some responsibility and held to it. That way, maybe they'd take some pride in something and learn to have a little self respect, which would then naturally be paid forward in the form of respect for others.

But what do we do? We mollycoddle these kids and excuse their behavior and parents are totally clueless and doctors and teachers and the world at large just want to avoid liability so these kids are held to nothing.

Ya know something, we could just enroll them all in music lessons. That whipped my butt into shape pretty fast!

Wow, I can't imagine doing that - that is so crazy!

Thats so scary that they are doing this - especially in the unfortunate cases when its too late to stop them