Major vibes please for my ex-daughter-in-law

I had a terrible phone call from my daughter, Faith, tonight. Her half-brother Graham's wife, my ex-husband's daughter-in-law, is suffering from terminal cancer at the age of 39. They have been keeping it secret, but Debbie had a double mastectomy in September and has been on chemo ever since. Now she has had bad headaches and they have confirmed that the cancer has moved to her brain. They have two daughters, aged 17 and 15. The extra really terrible thing for both Graham and for my ex, is that Graham's elder brother, Neil, died from leukaemia at the age of 13. I lived through it with them, and now they have it all over again. I cannot imagine what it must be like to have this happen twice. My ex has a new wife to help and support him, and Faith will do her best for her brother, but I know what they went through last time and I feel so helpless as not part of the family any more. There is absolutely nothing I can do - my ex's wife has always refused even to meet me (I have never understood why, as she met him years after we split). Please remember them all in your prayers and thoughts.

Sending loads of good vibes her way

It must be so frustrating to want to help and not be able to. The new wife must not know that you are a very special and kind person. Debbie and all are in my thoughts and prayers.

Sending lots of Vibes

Oh, Jennie, how sad. My thoughts and prayers are with you and this family.

That's such a difficult thing for any and every family to have to deal with. My thoughts are with them and you, Jenny.

How terrible. I will be praying for her and the family and for you too. Hugs

Oh how very sad! You may not be able to help directly, but your support of Faith at this difficult time is so important. I am sorry the family is going through such a horrible illness, and that your ex's new wife is making it worse. Prayers for all concerned, and especially Debbie.

Oh no, how terrible

Sending lots of Sending lots of Peaceful, Calming and Health }}}VIBES{{{ to Debbie and the family.

They are all in my thoughts

and lots of for you, Jenny!

Jenny thats so tragic, i'm so sorry

I too am sending vibes{{{{}}}} I hope her days are peaceful.

Jennie, I'm just catching up with this. I really wish them a lot of strength to get through this ordeal.

I am so sorry...I know you will give your daugher a lot of support as she supports them.

That is such a terrible thing for her to have to go through...many vibes her way.

Thanks everyone. My daughter spent yesterday with her dad and they talked about it all. I talked her through what happened with Neil so that she really understood things in advance and I think that helped as her father can barely, even over thirty years later, bring himself to mention it. She will go and see Graham and Debbie at school half term (they live over 200 miles away so it is not easy as my daughter teaches on Saturdays). She has also offered to take the girls if Graham and Debbie want some time to themselves, though at the moment they want to stay all together. They are a close unit, and that is good. I shall see Faith in February and see if there is anything I can do, though I doubt it, beyond just being there on the phone when needed.

Oh jenny that's very sad news so young also, My Heart goes out to all of you. My sis-in-law lost a neice to Ovarian cancer last year about the same age. Bless all of you, your in my Thoughts and Prayers.

I'm so sorry, Jenny -- that's just tragic for Debbie and the family, and very difficult for you to be in a situation where you don't have much opportunity to be supportive. Your willingness to be an ear and a shoulder for your daughter may be all you can offer in the circumstances, but it will be important to her nonetheless and, by extension, to the others. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.

That is so tragic. I am so sorry. She is in my thoughts and I am sending vibes.