Gender Bashing

I must admit I agree, ive seen it in a few places

Women get 'bashed' and discrimiated against in every aspect of society!

You can't blame us for letting off steam now and again in a mainly female group.

Still, we have some really great guys here and I think there are posts which just aren't very respectful and too generalized. We don't want to lose their respect and participation.

To be honest, I havent seen any disrespectful posts so maybe thats why I dont feel so strongly against it as you guys do?

I agree its nice to have male participation here but I bet that male dominated forums would be equally full of 'gender bashing' but maybe in a more subtle way.

Just because females are in the majority here doesn't make it ok.

I think the odd non PC joke here and there is ok, but the trouble is it's so hard not to offend someone out there. And I agree, if you switched the genders in the comment, would it be so funny?
I just think for the sake of keeping the high standards of this board, we have to be more censorial about such touchy issues. It is nice to have some men participating too, and I wouldn't want to see them scared off!

Okay, I have done that once here, and I was a little overtired but I suppose that is no excuse. It wasn't meant to be taken personally, and I considered deleting the post even though it was just a joke. Lots of people make little jokes like that, it's very common here, so I didn't really think about it. Usually when I see others posting stuff like that, the guys just laugh or fight back jokingly, and it seemed harmless enough. I had no idea some guys were taking things like that personally, though. I don't know, guess I'm just clueless like that. I usually don't take things about women personally, so I guess I figured men wouldn't either. It wasn't even very bad at all, but I do apologize (it was awhile ago though).

(I think I just said something about some men being lazy. Nobody said anything, except a few female TCS'ers made comments and agreed and stuff. In fact I think one male poster did just laugh or something.)

THANK YOU for making me aware that it does hurt, most of the time guys don't make that very obvious & laugh it off like it means nothing. I'm glad you spoke up.

I do agree with you, it isn't right, I'll be careful not to do it again!

Sorry!

Nial, I think you bring up a good point and one that is often much more subtle than the occassional joke at either gender's expense.

I've seen very often when a female member vents about her SO, the response is a vehement "LEAVE HIM!" as well as questioning if he is abusive or assuming he is, even if nothing has been mentioned about that. Sometimes, we just get upset and need a place to vent, but that doesn't mean that the whole relationship is bunk. It doesn't mean that the woman in question, even with valid gripes about her man, is being abused in any sense. And I also feel that seeing that response in relation to just about every griping post made makes that response have less impact when there is evidence of abuse in the relationship.

Just my two cents.

There is definatly adouble standard at work, But its in mainstream society as well. the man is always represented as either the bad, evil or weak and spineless.

Dx

Bashing isn't acceptable for either gender, race or religion as far as I'm concerned.

A little respect goes a long way toward good will, peace and harmony.

Well Said

I agree with the OP. There is no reason to gender bash for either side.

Im not trying to take sides or getting anything flamed up but there are people out there ( no one in particular) that need to be a little more thick skinned.... again, Im not pointing any fingers

Are you saying people should just except what is said? We have to remember what may offend one person may not offend someone else. As this is a family board we need to keep it at that level. If obvious sexism or racism etc is let go then we are not setting much of an example for any minors who read this.

treat people how you would like to be treated, if we work on that there would be few problems. Maybe before we Post something we need to sit back for a few moments and consider what we are saying. Im as much of a reactionary as other people maybe we need to just think a little more about how we come across. As i said i'm just as much to blame as anyone.

I like these sort of posts as it gets us all to think a little bit more about how we are percieved and how we treat people be it in real life or on the net.

Dx

I've read the forum rules, and it seems to me that there are proceedures in place for dealing with unacceptable postings in the forum. So we can report posts that are against the rules. But if we all simply agree to examine what we say before we actually post it, we'll save the mods, and everyone else, a lot of grief. I am as thick skinned as the next guy, but I also appreciate being in a forum where everyone cares about each other. That's why I'm here so much more than other boards I belong to. It's just nicer here.

Thank you for underlining that, Jeff. If anyone finds a post or thread objectionable, they should report it. That's easily done by clicking on the exclamation mark in the little red triangle. Although TCS is fairly closely monitored, it's obviously impossible for the relatively small team of volunteers to keep up with all the posts in all forums 24/7. If none of the mods responsible for a particular forum are online, other mods can temporarily pull the thread for later review.

It seems that male bashing and blonde jokes are widely accepted. I agree that we shouldn't contribute to that.

I have to agree with this post.

Also, if there is a thread by a woman and her man has supposedly done her wrong, there is bound to be the snide "man" comments. Doesn't make it right but it is the way it is.
I guess what I am asking is, are those kinds of threads against the rules?

Also, it doesn't bother me if a guy makes a gender specific comment, but that is just me.
IMO, the PC stuff has crossed the line.
but generalizing "all men" as bad is wrong. I have to admit I have done if myself.

If I have gender bashed, it's probably because of a man that wronged me in some way, but by no means do I ever mean it's ALL men, and I do apologize if I have EVER come across that way. I don't think I have ever said, "this guy did this and this to me, men are *%#@!!!" I've probably just said THAT particular man was *%#@!! If I thought all men were *%#@, I'd never date again! Plenty of women have wronged me too and I've bashed them just as much if they deserved it. To anyone who's ever seen a bashing post by me and been offended, and I'm sorry!

Wow I've never seen that happen here except as the odd joke thread or something. Didn't realise it was a problem? I would never `gender bash' anyone just because they were a man! I like it when guys join this site, it's nice to have a different perspective on some things. I thought for the most part the guys on here were treated with something akin to fond - almost motherly - affection.

I'll have to keep an eye out for it, but I gotta say I've not noticed...

One of these posts said that since women get bashed, then its OK for women to bash men. I disagree. It only makes the bashing between the two increase. Sometimes I have to think about my posts before I press that submit button.

One other forum that I'm on for work-related questions has a constant monitor on offensive material. I.e. the forum is much harsher as it deals with IT who can at sometimes be a little bitter and insecure. So often times I will see a response thar responds to someone's post "You're stupid for saying that". There's a link on each post that says "Click here to report any offensive material". Within an hour that "You're stupid" will be gone. TCS may want to consider something like that.

You can click in the red triangle in the upper right corner of the offending post and notify the mods. There is also a text box for you to describe the issue with the post.

This was in my E-mail the other day. In the interest of poking a bit of harmless fun at my friends......

Gender Poetry
I'M GLAD I'M A MAN
I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe.
I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese.
I don't bitch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts.
I can get where I want to - north, south, east or west.
I don't get wasted after only 2 beers,
and when I do drink I don't end up in tears.
I won't spend hours deciding what to wear.
I spend 5 minutes max fixing my hair.
And I don't go around checking my reflection
in everything shiny from every direction.
I don't whine in public and make us leave early, and
when you ask why get all bitter and surly.
I'm glad I'm a man, I'm so glad I could sing.
I don't have to sit around waiting for that ring.
I don't gossip about friends or stab them in the back.
I don't carry our differences into the sack.
I'll never go psycho and threaten to kill you
or think every guy out there's trying to steal you.
I'm rational, reasonable, and logical too.
I know what the time is and I know what to do.
And I honestly think its a privilege for me
to have these two balls and stand when I pee.
I live to watch sports and play all sorts of ball.
It's more fun than dealing with women after all.
I won't cry if you say it's not going to work.
I won't remain bitter and call you a jerk.
Feel free to use me for immediate pleasure.
I won't assume it's permanent by any measure.
Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a man, you see.
I'm glad I'm not capable of child delivery.
I don't get all bitchy every 28 days.
I'm glad that my gender gets me a much bigger raise.
I'm a man by chance and I'm thankful it's true.
I'm so glad I'm a man and not a woman like you!

I'M GLAD I'M A WOMAN
I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am.
I don't live off of Budweiser, Beer Nuts and Spam.
I don't brag to my buddies about my erections.
I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions.
I don't get wasted at parties, and act like a clown.
And I know how to put that damned toilet seat down!
I won't grab your hooters, I won't pinch your butt.
My belt buckle's not hidden beneath my beer gut.
And I don't go around "readjusting" my crotch,
or yell like Tarzan when my headboard gets a notch.
I don't belch in public, I don't scratch my behind.
I'm a woman you see-I'm just not that kind!
I'm glad I'm a woman, I'm so glad I could sing.
I don't have body hair like shag carpeting.
It doesn't grow from my ears or cover my back.
When I lean over you can't see 3 inches of crack.
And what's on my head doesn't leave with my comb.
I'll never buy a toupee to cover my dome.
Or have a few hairs pulled from over the side.
I'm a woman, you know-I've got far too much pride!
And I honestly think its a privilege for me,
to have these two boobs and sit down when I pee.
I don't live to play golf and shoot basketball.
I don't swagger and spit like a Neanderthal.
I won't tell you my wife just does not understand,
or stick my hand in my pocket to hide that gold band.
Or tell you a story to make you sigh and weep,
then screw you, roll over and fall sound asleep!
Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a woman, you see.
Forget all about that old penis envy.
I don't long for male bonding, I don't cruise for chicks.
Join the Hair Club For Men, or think with my dick.
I'm a woman by chance and I'm thankful, it's true.
I'm so glad I'm a woman and not a man like you!

Great poems jdpesz. Kind of puts things in perspective when we can laugh at ourselves. I know I can.

I don`t think I have done that...and if I have it would only be done in fun....but I want to apoligise if I ever have and have hurt anyones feelings. I`d never mean to do that....and I don`t approve of it when it`s done in seriousness
I guess my rule of thumb is....I would`nt hand out anything that I could`nt take back in return.
Linda